Reply #17: Ah, Kiraboo! I, too am a lonely artist

[jobycom]

I am affecting a slight South American gentleman's accent, just for you. Don't let my job as a bookkeeper at a tire shop fool you, I am a millionaire in my soul, where it counts. I could get you a job, too. Can you change tires? I am much younger than 60 (41), and not very fit, but these days I am becoming well-rounded. I could buy you a cell phone, too, though you may have to sign a ten year contract and give me a credit card number. Depends, let me check for specials first.

You and I are destined to meet, for you are beautiful, and I am male. (And that whole Maine-Texas thing is working, too--you know, like the Bush family). I am assuming you are beautiful, for I am a lonely male, and slightly well-rounded.

I, however, am not a well known artist or painter, though there is a man who painted my house who could maybe teach you to paint. And I could teach you to change your oil. Forget your male friend, though, for I am a lonely millionaire, and well-rounded, and have no spare change for guys.

And I almost speak several languages, having studied Latin, Spanish, French, and Arabic. You want to test me. Here, have a sixth drink first. No, that was not a sleeping powder I mixed in, it was a, um, spirit enhancer. It will make you see things as I do, like my million dollars, and my artist's soul, and stars. Wow, will it make you see stars. Aye carumba!

What do you think? Shall I show you the world? I have one on my desk, it won't take long... And like me, it is well-rounded.