Reply #63: It does seem the most vocal antis are men.

[Deep N RedLand]

The very gender who does not have to worry about ever facing a situation this difficult.

This was hight-lighted by a conversation with a conservative co-worker the other day who seemed moderate on some things and I once thought I was influencing to see things differently.

His response to my challenge of someone else can feel it is their place to take away a woman's choice over her body provoked the usual Right-Wing crap I've come to expect from those who have no clue. His response was feigned indignation that I could approve of "murder" of "children", yet was against killing criminals (a penalty he felt should be expanded to include more types of crime and subscribes to the "Have to crack a few eggs" theory when it comes to those later found innocent after execution). He also couldn't seem to understand how I could place more value on the lives of those lost in Iraq since his response is our soldiers volunteered knowing the risks and how can I care about "terrorists" (which to him means all Iraqis, including civilians.).

But one response revealed all when in response to my question of injuries to female soldiers he said "The bitches shouldn't been over there. Is they didn't want to lose an arm or leg they should have stayed in the home and took care of their children". I should note that he has expressed similar biblical driven patriarchal views in the past.

So I agree a lot of the abortion debate does seem to be about power; the power the fundies feel they must have over the rest of us and men over women. I find the antis position especially hypocritically when in the case of this co-worker he has a on-off relationship with someone he only considers "a friend" and never has any intention to marry (yet believes so much in "saving" the concept from gays) yet admits to unprotected sex. When I asked how he would feel if this "friend" got pregnant that seemed to stop the conversation as he claimed he had to go and do something work-related. I have longed learned once some antis are faced with the situation themselves (or even start thinking about it), their commitment to the position seems to crumble.

Anyone who has never faced having to choose can never understand how difficult it is and how most women do not make a decision lightly. The majority do not choose abortion as he and the other fundies would claim for "birth control". They can never seem to get through their bible taught guilt skulls that pro-choice is not pro-abortion (there is no such position) and it is one of the most difficult and heartrending for all decisions for patients, their families and medical providers alike.

Another recommended book I just read that hight-lights this is "Caught in the Crossfire: A year on abortion's front lines". It is somewhat dated, but I believe presents an excellent view of how multifaceted the abortion debate is and the barriers women face to obtain one.

All the best to you and your sister, Fenris, as well as anyone else who must go through a choice that useless they are faced with can never truely understand.