Equal Time with Bob Boudelang
"The Republicans Are the Party for
Brain Dead People! Hooray!"
March 26, 2005
By Bob Boudelang, Angry American Patriot
who can doubt now that there is only one party for brain dead people
I am talking, of course about the Republican Party and Our Great
President. It is clear that the brain dead everywhere can count
on them, unless of course, unelected activist judges who will not
I blame the Socialist Democrap culture of death, which would deny
people life-affirming assault weapons and would stop torturing prisoners
if they could. Which is better, that women get to choose when to
be pregnant and people get to die with dignity? Or that Our Great
President interrupt his vacation and fly back to Washington to sign
an emergency bill passed without a quorum despite what some dusty
But fortunately happy days are here again, because God has sent
Terry Shyvo to die so that people will stop talking about all the
Our Great Republican Guy in the House of Representatives Tom Delay
(who is not a dangeous nut) is having. Which we know because Tom
Delay said so.
"One thing that God has brought to us is Terri Schiavo, to help
elevate the visibility of what is going on in America. This is exactly
the issue that is going on in America, of attacks against the conservative
movement, against me and against many others," Tom Delay said.
Another happy result of this lady dying is that she is a great
issue to attack DemocRATS with and will get people
And another wonderful thing about Terri dying is that it will bring
Republicans and conservatives lots more money. The Reverend Louis
Sheldon, who is not a crazy bigot, said happily
that many people are opening up their checkbooks and sending him
money so he can keep speaking out about gay people except when they
are prostitutes who are pretending to be reporters at White House
press conferences who got in without background checks and got ahold
of clasified documents.
That is how glad we right wingers are that this woman is dying.
And how desperate are the Democraps? So desperate that they are
trying to pretend that the cuts in Medicaid that Tom Delay and Our
Great President tried to put through have something
to do with this lady, just because part of her care is paid by Medicaid.
What kind of crazy person thinks the budget on health care has anything
to do with health care? It is just numbers on a page! It just shows
that leftists and moderates are disconnected from reality.
How can they ignore what a doctor who was nominated for the Nobel
Peace Prize in Medicine
says? They are also ignoring the opinion of great doctors like Senator
Doctor Bill Frisp who only stole a few measly billion from Medicare.
Doctor Senator Bill Frisp pulls the plug on his patients regularly
but then he believes in the culture of life. Besides, he does not
need to actually examine patients to know they are going to get
well or not but can just look at a videotape, which probably speeds
up whether he pulls the plug on his patients or not.
But then Senator Doctor Bill Frisp has values and is part of the
of life. Without the Republican culture of life, how will we
ever get the mercury
into the environment? Without the Republican culture of life, we
would have to stop torturing prisoners just because torture does
It is scary to think that if it were not for the culture of life,
the oil company could not work its magic
in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and polar bears and musk
oxes would run through the wilderness without being killed.
Just think, without the GOP, doctors might be sued for malpractice
and families might be able to declare bankruptcy
due to medical costs.
Fortunately America has escaped that nightmare thanks to Our Great
Presidentís leadership and the Republicans who follow his every
wim. Now families will have to pay every penny they owe to doctors
like Bill Frisp and Tom
Coburn (who is not a crazy bigot)
when they kill somebody. That is the Republican culture of life,
Bob Boudelang is a Republican team leader who would be happy to
take donations for brain deadness. You can send them to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Read Bob's Other Rebuttals