Equal Time with Bob Boudelang
"So Long Almost Everybody But Concertina
Rice, We Hardly Knew Ye!"
November 13, 2004
By Bob Boudelang, Angry American Patriot
already the Second Successful Term of Our Great President is underway,
and nothing could show what a success the first term was then the
number of people who are leaving their jobs in such a hurry.
Pretty much every one is gone except Concertina Rice, who will
take over Colon Powellís roll as Secretary of State and will soon
be going around from country to country explaining to them what
George W. means when he says stuff like "We thought we were protected
forever from trade policy or terrorist attacks because oceans protected
us." She will also explain that he does not mean anything when he
walks around with his pants open.
Concertinaís first big test will be dealing with the mess in the
Ukrain, where the election was a fraud. That is as plain as the
nose on my face because the exit poles did not match the election
Secretary of Defensive Donald Rumfilled also has not been fired
yet. So the two people who did so much to protect us all from terrorism
(if you donít count September 11) and make the war with Iraq such
a success (if you donít count the bombings and killings and corruption)
will still be with us, do not fear.
However, our great Attorney General John "The Eagle is Sore" Ashcroft
who is not a dangerous nut has left us. During his rain he protected
America from such dangerous criminals as Marsha Stewart, Cat Stevens
and either Cheech or Chong. And no, he did not get a single conviction
of any actual terrorists but he did do a good job of protecting
Amendment rights when dragonian Democraps wanted to see if terrorists
To show what a jenius Our Great President is, he is replacing John
Ashcroft with a Mexican, which will mean the next Attorney General
will do more work for less pay, and doesnít that help hardworking
taxpayers like you?
Homely Secretary of Security Tom Ridge is also leaving, having
given America a swell color chart and duct tape, which was not funny
so stop that laughing! Without his important work, America would
not of known that terrorists were about to attack every time Our
Great Presidentís popularity went down in the poles.
Our new Homely Secretary of Security will be Bernard Carrot, who
used to work for the king of Saudi Arabia and will be an inspiration
to high school dropouts everywhere. And yes, he did swipe money
while selling cigarettes in prison,
but to be fair, there is hardly any cigarette sales in his new job.
Also Don Evans who they say was Commerce Secretary is leaving,
and who can forget all he did to bring about the Bush
what ever it was? He will also be replaced by a low paid Hispanish
person, Carlos Gutierrez. And yes, Gutierrez threw hundreds of people
out of work when he closed a cornflakes plant, but so what? Carlos
made millions himself,
and that is what is most important.
Meanwhile, Health Inhuman Cervix Secretary Tommy "Tommy" Thompson
has stepped down after a job well done. And yes, while he was in
office the country did not get flu
vaccine, and yes, while he was in office the FD & A okayed drugs
that were dangerous and then tried to hide the evidence that they
and yes, while he was in office Medicare got screwed up and his
department lied about how much it cost,
but gee wiz! The man is only human, or so it seems.
And so now all of America can look forward to another four years
of advances under the leadership of Our Great President and the
Republican Party. Let us give them our full support as they work
hard to make sure rat poison is no longer childproof
or that teenagers are told fibs
to prevent safe sex, or that millionaires can hide their money in
places like the Cayman Island without paying tax.
You would think that even a diehard LIEberal socialist DemoncRAT
like Mrs. Brown Rosenfeld would realize that it is time to shut
up and knuckle under to Our Great Presidentís every wim, but no!
It is still as bad as Communist Canada here at the Daisyview Trailer
Park. For example, when George W. showed how sincere he was about
reaching out to Democraps by going to the Klintoon library and not
kicking or hitting any, I was so proud of him I cut this picture
out and put it up on my trailer.
And she said "Guess Chelseaís not afraid of a little drip" and
would not explain what she meant.
I celebrated Thanksgiving by putting up this picture.
And she said "Most people like him choke a chicken" and would not
explain what she meant.
Well let her say whatever it is she says. I am proud to be a Republican
team leader. Support Our Great President, as it says in the Bible,
even when his pants are open, which could happen to anybody.
Bob Boudelang is a Republican Team Leader who has spent a great
deal of time thinking about the direction this country should take
in the next four years and was not just off getting drunk. He can
be reached at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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