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The
CoulterGeist
August 1, 2002
By R. Porrofatto
Ann Coulter, like others of her right-wing ilk, is a hate
monger, pure and simple. The CoulterGeist lives and loves
to hate, to froth, to rage against her enemies, to spew forth
mindless belligerence and intellectual dishonesty, and the
people she loves to hate most are her fellow Americans. She
wants the rest of us to hate these Americans, too.
Why? Because they are loathsome extremists, an evil "cabal,"
a "cult," the worst scum of humanity, and most importantly,
they don't agree with her. She calls them "liberals," and
it is a species which exists solely in what passes for her
own mind. Sure, half a million more people voted for one of
those liberals over what she calls our present "magnificent
leader" but dear Ann hates them all. Hate, hate, hate. It's
because "her" liberals are traitors, you see, treasonous villains
who want to destroy America.
In her benighted Hassenlust, facts are beyond her ken, and
she wouldn't want them to interfere with her lunatic rage.
It doesn't matter that Ron Dellums, one of those "liberals"
she excoriates for treason, is a decorated veteran of the
Marine Corps. And who cares if Charles Rangel was decorated
for valor in the Korean War or that George McGovern flew 35
bomber missions in WWII and earned a Distinguished Flying
Cross for bravery under fire?
It makes no difference that John Kerry won the Silver Star,
a Bronze Star and three Purple Hearts, five more medals than
the combined totals earned by George W. Bush, Dick Cheney,
Rush Limbaugh Dick Armey, Phil Gramm, Newt Gingrich, Tom Delay,
and all the rest of the right-wing chicken hawks. Kerry and
McGovern are liberal, and therefore they must be traitors
to America.
Of course, there are millions of other liberals who are combat
veterans, firefighters, policemen, rescue workers, Red Cross
volunteers, teachers, and so on. They are real Americans,
patriots, and citizens. What they are not is shrill, puerile
screamers who demonize their fellow citizens for cash and
televised infamy. Unlike these "liberals," what single positive
contribution has Ann Coulter ever made to our society? Does
she think that by making insane, inflammatory, malignant generalizations
about a fictive political enemy she is doing good work? Does
she believe that by spewing her evil animosity she is engaged
in a patriotic act?
An argument could be made that if she hates so many Americans
as much as she does, perhaps she is the one who is disloyal,
un-patriotic, and guilty of treason.
Below is a sampling of her words from various sources. Judge
for yourself.
"Being in league with known terrorists may be suspicious,
but it is not probable cause to believe that a particular
crime is being or has been committed by a specific individual.
Were the law otherwise, one could get a warrant to search
anyone who associates with the Clintons."
"Even Islamic terrorists don't hate America like liberals
do."
"If it wasn't for Linda Tripp, Monica Lewinsky would have
ended up just like Chandra Levy."
"Liberals always get a lot of credit for suffering, while
never actually being made to suffer."
"Liberals are always wrapping their comically irrelevant
charges in a haze of lies..."
"The FBI allowed thousands of Americans [in the WTC] to be
slaughtered on the altar of political correctness. What more
do liberals want?"
"We know who the homicidal maniacs are. They are the ones
cheering and dancing right now. We should invade their countries,
kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity."
"Women -- and I don't mean to limit that to the biological
sense -- always become hysterical at the first sign of trouble.
They have no capacity to solve problems, so instead they fret.
But despite the fearful fifth columnists whiling away the
war naysaying America's response, we will win this war."
"[c]onservatives always knew they had to win at the ballot
box; liberals prefer to skip voting and win by judicial fiat."
"A cruise missile is more important than Head Start."
"After Sept. 11, liberals are appalled by patriotism with
an edge of anger because that might lead America to defend
itself. "
"Anorexics never have boyfriends. ... That's one way to know
you don't have anorexia, if you have a boyfriend."
"Clinton is in love with the erect penis."
"For the record, it is not illegal for a third party to pay
legal fees. If it were, Bill Clinton would be bankrupt and
Barbra Streisand would be in jail -- which, come to think
of it, isn't a bad idea."
"God gave us the earth. We have dominion over the plants,
the animals, the trees. God said, 'Earth is yours. Take it.
Rape it. It's yours."
"I am emboldened by my looks to say things Republican men
wouldn't."
"I have to say I'm all for public flogging. One type of criminal
that a public humiliation might work particularly well with
are the juvenile delinquents, a lot of whom consider it a
badge of honor to be sent to juvenile detention. And it might
not be such a cool thing in the 'hood to be flogged publicly."
"I think [women] should be armed but should not [be allowed
to] vote."
"I think there should be a literacy test and a poll tax for
people to vote."
"If they have the one innocent person who has ever to be
put to death this century out of over 7,000, you probably
will get a good movie deal out of it."
"If those kids had been carrying guns they would have gunned
down this one [child] gunman. ... Don't pray. Learn to use
guns."
"If you don't hate Clinton and the people who labored to
keep him in office, you don't love your country."
"It's enough [to be impeached] for the president to be a
pervert."
"Juan Gonzales is Cuba's answer to Joey Buttafuoco, a miscreant,
sperm-donor, and a poor man's Hugh Hefner."
"Let's say I go out every night, I meet a guy and have sex
with him. Good for me. I'm not married."
"Liberal sneers about President Bush's intelligence suddenly
abated - at first for reasons of decorum, but then because
of the indisputable fact that Bush was a magnificent leader.
"
"Liberals can never just make a principled argument."
"Liberals are angrier at John Ashcroft for questioning angry
Arab immigrants applying for crop duster permits than they
are about the terrorists. These people simply do not have
an implacable desire to kill those who cheered the slaughter
of thousands of American citizens. "
"Liberals are up to their old tricks again. Twenty years
of treason haven't slowed them down."
"Liberals become indignant when you question their patriotism,
but simultaneously work overtime to give terrorists a cushion
for the next attack and laugh at dumb Americans who love their
country and hate the enemy."
"Liberals dispute slight reductions in the marginal tax rates
as if they are trying to prevent Charles Manson from slaughtering
baby seals."
"Like everything liberals oppose but don't have a good argument
for, all reasonable national security measures are called
"unconstitutional." Whenever liberals are losing on substance,
they pretend to be upset about process."
"My libertarian friends are probably getting a little upset
now but I think that's because they never appreciate the benefits
of local fascism."
"No matter what defeatist tack liberals take, real Americans
are behind our troops 100 percent, behind John Ashcroft 100
percent, behind locking up suspected terrorists 100 percent,
behind surveillance of Arabs 100 percent."
"President Clinton had crack pipes on the White House Christmas
tree."
"The Democratic message is "socialism, class warfare and
atheism"; liberalism is "the official government religion"
and is "devoted to class warfare, ethnic hatred and intolerance";
"God has no part in the religion [liberalism] of sex education,
environmentalism, feminism, Marxism and loving Big Brother."
"Name-calling has been the principal argument liberals have
deployed against conservative arguments". (2/22)"
"The backbone of the Democratic Party is a typical fat, implacable
welfare recipient."
"The infernal flag-waving after 9/11 nearly drove liberals
out of their gourds. For the left, 'flag-waving' is an epithet."
"The liberal catechism includes a hatred of Christians, guns,
the profit motive, and political speech and an infatuation
with abortion, the environment, and race discrimination (or
in the favored parlance of liberals, 'affirmative action')."
"The most crazed religious fanatic argues in more calm and
reasoned tones than liberals responding to statistics on concealed-carry
permits."
"The presumption of innocence only means you don't go right
to jail."
"The swing voters - I like to refer to them as the idiot
voters because they don't have set philosophical principles.
You're either a liberal or you're a conservative if you have
an IQ above a toaster."
"The thing I like about Bush is I think he hates liberals."
"Through their enervating dialogues and endless concerns
with constitutional process, liberals have made themselves
incapable of feeling hate for the enemy."
"To a disabled Vietnam vet: "People like you caused us to
lose that war."
"We're now at the point that it's beyond whether or not this
guy is a horny hick. I really think it's a question of his
mental stability. He really could be a lunatic. I think it
is a rational question for Americans to ask whether their
president is insane."
When The New York Times urged Bush to "crack down" on anti-abortion
activists who threaten doctors: "[i]n their darkest fantasies,
this is what liberals claim McCarthyism was."
"When contemplating college liberals, you really regret once
again that John Walker is not getting the death penalty. We
need to execute people like John Walker in order to physically
intimidate liberals, by making them realize that they can
be killed too. Otherwise they will turn out to be outright
traitors."
"Whether conducted in Congress, on the political talk shows,
or played out at dinners and cocktail parties, politics is
a nasty sport. At the risk of giving away the ending: It's
all liberals' fault."
"While hooting with laughter at patriotic Americans, liberals
prattle on and on about the right to dissent as the true mark
of patriotism and claim their unrelenting kvetching is a needed
corrective to jingoism. (It's not jingoism, and the only people
who use that word are fifth columnists.)"
"Women like Pamela Harriman and Patricia Duff are basically
Anna Nicole Smith from the waist down. Let's just call it
for what it is. They're whores."
"You want to be careful not to become just a blowhard."
"[Clinton] masturbates in the sinks."
"Liberals are savagely cruel bigots who hate ordinary Americans
and lie for sport."
"We should have military tribunals for liberal lawyers."
"The spirit of the First Amendment has been effectively repealed
for conservative speech by a censorious, accusatory mob."
"God said ... 'rape the planet -- it's yours.' That's our
job: drilling, mining and striping. Sweaters are the anti-Biblical
view. Big gas-guzzling cars with phones and CD players and
wet bars -- that's the Biblical view."
"I think [Whitewater]'s going to prevent the First Lady from
running for Senate."
"My track record is pretty good on predictions."
You can find the origins of these quotes by searching Google.com
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