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Dubya's
Boring Presidentiary
October
6, 2001
by Max Starsky
Throughout the whole 2000 Presidential campaign, one thing
that really struck me about George W Bush, besides his obvious
stupidity, was that I never truly believed he really wanted
the presidency. He never actually sought it all that much,
instead being pushed into it by his family name, his political
associates, the far-right and his number one henchman from
Texas, Karl "I'm The Boss Around Here" Rove.
No, Bush gave me the impression that he was quite willing
to go along for the ride and that he thought, like most of
us in this country, that America would never elect a dimwit
like himself. Watching Bush these past few days has only strengthened
my theory.
George W. Bush is bored being the President.
There is absolutely no doubt that Bush will enjoy much more
being the Ex-President. He will be able to use the title of
"Ex-President Bush" to seek the office he has really coveted
his entire life -- that of Baseball Commissioner. Let's face
it, how can MLB say no to the Ex-President when he comes a
knockin' at their door wanting to be Baseball Commissioner?
You just know it's going to happen -- one day -- and hopefully
for us all, that day will be much sooner than later!
On Tuesday Bush went to "officially" reopen the inappropriately
named Ronald Reagan Washington National Airport.
Looking bedraggled and in need of a damn good nap, Bush was
even more incoherent than he normally is, actually declaring
that along with the airplanes, "ticket counters" could also
resume flying from D.C.
However, later in the day, with Uncle Dick right beside him,
Bush was trying to conduct a press conference -- and he looked
even more dreadful than he did earlier.
His hair was a mess, his eyes drooped......he looked and
sounded.....depressed.....and bored. He really sounded tired,
worn out, fed up, depressed and bored out of his skin. You
could see it in his eyes.....he would have much rather preferred
to have been back on his ranch chopping Cedar, throwing the
ball for Spot the Dog and talking to his cows than having
to ramble on about things that don't interest him all that
much.....like world events and the economy!
And once again I thought to myself, "This guy has had
enough. He doesn't want to be President any more than I want
to have a hot, romantic evening with Karen Hughes."
Now of course there's no doubt that Bush isn't doing much
of the work that a President needs to do anyway. Instead he
"delegates" to Dick and Karen and Karl and Ari and whoever
else happens to be standing near him at the appropriate moment.....or
more to the truth, they plain don't allow him to do anything
that's too stressful or that requires some "thought". But
I think he's fed up with having to pretend he's calling the
shots, all the same.
He's tired of having to rehearse Karen and Karl's speeches
over and over again until he can say all of the long words
without his tongue stumbling all over them.. Sick of not being
able to go to bed until Uncle Dick, Karen and Karl brief him
on the next days events at 10:00 o'clock each evening. Totally
had enough of having to think of words longer than five letters
when giving impromptu, off the cuff press conferences. And
absolutely ticked off at being made to look like the fool
he really is by the young upstart with the funny accent from
"across the pond" named Tony Blair, who shows us all, on a
daily basis, what a "real leader" should sound like, whilst
demonstrating the huge contrast in leadership skills and intelligence
between himself and George Dubya.
No, I've no doubt that George W Bush is totally bored with
his presidentiary. He is certainly longing for the day, like
we all are, when he can finally leave the White House and
get MLB to make him Commissioner of Baseball.
Because as the "Ex-President", how are they going to say
no?
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