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A Letter From Colorado
by Anonymous

I was afraid I was going to spend the next four years in a right-wing echo chamber from coast to coast! Oh, that's right, the right wing tells us that talk radio is part of the liberal media. That's funny, here in Colorado, I'd calculate talk radio at about 90 percent right wing.

Also here in Colorado, we're waiting for Dubya's other monumentally stupid nomination's foot to drop. Gale Norton will be a disaster. Trust me, she will. We've had to put up with her as Attorney General of Colorado, and the only time she did anything remotely close to protecting the environment was defending the clean-up of an old chemical weapons plant, the Rocky Mountain Arsenal. Yes, that's right, it has to be something that virtually everyone can agree is destructive and harmful to the environment before she will even dip her toe in the environmental pool. Oh, the horrors! She probably spent months with hives.

Now I hear she's recommending another stalwart of environmental destruction to a high position within the Interior Department, a dude named Gregg Walcher. His latest job was chairman of the Colorado State Wildlife Commission. That job was a political appointment, and he wasn't appointed to that position to be a steward of wildlife. He was appointed to block the programs of the stewards on the board. And he did. The rightward shift of the Wildlife Commission is too lengthy of a list to go into, but anyone can do the research on the controveries going on at the Wildlife Commission within the last two years.

Suffice to say, when I venture out in the mountains of Colorado over the next four years, I will be looking over my shoulder for ATVs running me down and self-appointed right-wing "wise-use" whackos spying my tree-hugging backpack, sans camoflauge pants and shaved head, and taking me out. It will happen to someone in the next four years. It's only a matter of when and how often. Remember the Forest Service office being blown up in Arizona a few years go? Remember the IRS office being blown up in Colorado Springs a few years ago? Well, I'm afraid that violence will be redirected now that the righties have the government's reigns, and I'm afraid the crosshairs will be on progressives' backs.

I, for one, dread the next four years, but I'm optimistic that the right-wingers will go too far too quick, thus ushering in a landslide for the Democrats in 2004. For now, the coup goosesteps on.

Oh, since Dubya probably hasn't opened a dictionary since college, as well as most right-wingers, I'm enclosing a simple definition from Webster's since Dubya mysteriously still thinks he's operating under a mandate.

mandate: an authorization to act given to a representative [accepted the ~ of the people]

Representative means you, Dubya. Oh, I forgot. Dubya thinks "the people" number only five.

There's one other syntactic clue I'll give you right-wingers out there. Stop already with the juvenile reference: Democrat Party. You're using Democrat as an adjective. It's a noun, folks. It's Democratic Party. I know, you righties think it's cute or belittling or something, a slur on the Democrats. Sorry, but it only makes you look stupid. Really, I'm trying to do you a favor. Come on, guys, high school English wasn't that difficult, was it?

You'll notice that we Democrats don't refer to your party as the Republic Party. I suppose ultimately it's a reflection of which party has developed the most maturity. Alas, I'm afraid the adjective/noun confusion will increase over the next four years now that the righties think they have a mandate (A mandate from planet X maybe?).

 

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