9. Obama can keep his gift because Romney already gave me mine
Slinking his ignorant, overprivileged ass right back into the annals of history where it belongs. I can't believe that even for a day, I thought he was a decent person who just happened to support ideals different from my own.
There's nothing decent about the man. Even the people trying to convince the rest of us that he was president-worthy last week have already washed their hands of him. May the gods pee down the lapels of his overpriced suits from here to eternity.