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[Sera_Bellum]

8. Most women

have men in their lives. Indeed, they are quite male identified. If it's fine with their man, who would they be to contradict him?

I worked with a fantastic woman a few years ago who has subsequently succumbed to pancreatic cancer. Shortly before her diagnosis she bravely admitted she wanted out of her 40 year marriage. Her husband whom I met a handful of times seemed ok. She was a strong spirit, bright and articulate. Behind closed doors obviously things were bleak. One of the last conversations we had prior to her passing, she said this. "I don't know what I like, I don't know what to watch on t.v. I don't know whom to vote, I don't know where I want to visit..."

What her husband ate, she ate. What her husband watched, she watched.

It took her a long time to realize she had no agency, no sense of self.