Reply #35

In the discussion thread: My dad called from out of the blue the other day. We hadn't spoken since my niece's wedding [View all]

Response to awoke_in_2003 (Reply #27)

Sun Apr 29, 2012, 12:32 AM

Rowdyboy (20,668 posts)

35. He really had no idea what to expect-it took guts. We've spoken maybe three times in ten years...

One of my life-lessons is what you said-"get things cleared up before its too late".

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72 replies	Author	Time	Post
My dad called from out of the blue the other day. We hadn't spoken since my niece's wedding [View all]	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	OP
wonderful	NMlib	Apr 2012	#1
Welcome to DU, my favorite website and thanks for making one of your first posts	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#2
nail on head	NMlib	Apr 2012	#3
It was the only real option he had. He was very impressed with Canada's national health insurance	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#4
You are an amazing son. It does my soul good to hear this story. Bless all of you.	The Wielding Truth	Apr 2012	#5
I thank you for your kindness and I thank you for your blessings....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#6
so then you are going to go visit alone ?	KILL THE WISE ONE	Apr 2012	#7
Probably the next time I go to New Orleans-which will be this year....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#47
You rock dude. Very good of you to hear him out.	xchrom	Apr 2012	#8
He deserved it....the more I remember the more I'm reminded of the chances he took for us...He drove	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#48
Wow. That is so awesome that you are so past the ill feelings. Your heart is pure. I send you a hug!	DesertDiamond	Apr 2012	#9
You're very kind and I send the hug back....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#50
Wonderful and moving storry	mazzarro	Apr 2012	#10
During our conversation I suggested he call my younger brother whose birthday (4/24) is 3 days	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#51
Right before my father died	BlueToTheBone	Apr 2012	#11
+1. n/t	Smarmie Doofus	Apr 2012	#23
My grandfather was my surrogate dad when I was a kid-he taught me stuff like how to fix a bicycle	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#49
Rowdyboy, thank you for sharing.	babylonsister	Apr 2012	#12
Family relationships are complicated but it was closure and it felt good...My mom forgave him for	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#30
It would be nice if people could see the harm they do	CanonRay	Apr 2012	#13
And I am as guilty of that as he is, I've hurt family and friends in the past	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#52
Sadly, ditto.	CanonRay	Apr 2012	#57
I am so glad you had a big enough heart to hear him out, and forgive him.	peacebird	Apr 2012	#14
The person he hurt most in life was the person I loved best-my mother....She was the single	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#53
Forgiveness if mostly for the person who has been harmed -	hedgehog	Apr 2012	#15
I have no doubt that you wil forgive when you need to....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#37
Beautiful	dbackjon	Apr 2012	#16
Thank you my friend for reading....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#54
You bought tears to my eyes. I'm glad you are able to forgive him. He is old but you really,	southernyankeebelle	Apr 2012	#17
I honestly hope he doesn't feel guilt.....His problem for 50 + years has been alcohol....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#38
We all have are battles to fight. Don't we. My battle is fat. I have given up on trying to loose.	southernyankeebelle	Apr 2012	#59
Each and every family has some situation like this...One day my family was a strong, dynamic force.	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#68
Boy you ain't whisling dixie. I think onces my mother died we all just aren't as	southernyankeebelle	Apr 2012	#70
Thanks for sharing that here.	closeupready	Apr 2012	#18
Pretty much everybody with a family can relate in some way. Writing the op helped me sort it out	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#31
Whoa.	Smarmie Doofus	Apr 2012	#19
Thats one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me....It really was more a mental exercise	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#32
You covered some pretty intricate and delicate emotional terrain.	Smarmie Doofus	Apr 2012	#42
I think my problem has always been lack of discipline....I've always been very self-indulgent	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#43
Thanks for sharing this.	Zorra	Apr 2012	#20
It was cathartic....it helped me to organize my thoughts and put in perspective....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#44
I love this	Vanje	Apr 2012	#21
I never expected so many people to relate to this but I should have....everyone experiences family	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#45
I'm so happy for you	mitchtv	Apr 2012	#22
He was just a kid, alcohol messed him up pretty badly, and his own parents divorced when he was 19	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#46
I hope that your kindness and ability to forgive is repaid to you a hundredfold. I think it will be.	yardwork	Apr 2012	#24
Nothing he could do or say now has the power to hurt me... There would be no point in continuing to	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#33
You're right. You won in all ways. Still, it was kind and good of you to be kind to him now.	yardwork	Apr 2012	#63
Very kind and generous of you, healing your family.	freshwest	Apr 2012	#25
Wow! What an experience...	Rhiannon12866	Apr 2012	#26
Oh, he just pissed my younger brother off big time with some over -the-line comments on Facebook	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#34
Facebook strikes me as very weird	Rhiannon12866	Apr 2012	#61
it takes a big man...	awoke_in_2003	Apr 2012	#27
He really had no idea what to expect-it took guts. We've spoken maybe three times in ten years...	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#35
I have so many friends who wish for this to happen every single day.	Warpy	Apr 2012	#28
We spent some time together at my niece's funeral two years ago....And he is a sick, old man....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#36
I agree	Fearless	Apr 2012	#39
Its a long complicated relationship (aren't they all) but for now I'm gonna hold off and maybe call	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#40
Absolulely take your time and do it on your terms!	Fearless	Apr 2012	#41
I've been busy all day planting a garden, just now had a chance to check back in. I had no idea	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#29
Welcome!	colorado_ufo	Apr 2012	#55
wow almost my life....but	irisblue	Apr 2012	#56
I'm very sorry you experienced this trashy treatment. Everyone deserves better, regardless of the	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#69
Kinda the same here	HillWilliam	Apr 2012	#58
I don't understand how they can do it. Why don't they see us? I wanted Ward Cleaver for my dad	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#66
Hey, buddy	HillWilliam	Apr 2012	#71
Steve, my kids think I forgave their father too	JitterbugPerfume	Apr 2012	#60
The fact is, you may very well be right....my mom was an expert at manipulating me....	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#65
Rowdyboy, I think you are a marvel	Iwillnevergiveup	Apr 2012	#62
We're all on the same boat...but your story really moved me. I think of all the older family	Rowdyboy	Apr 2012	#67
............	Angry Dragon	Apr 2012	#64
Sorry I missed this earlier. Best wishes to you, your partner and your family.	grantcart	Apr 2012	#72

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