20. You're a dear to be so kind, and I'm sure I'd like it better there.
If I had cable or satellite I'd be the world's biggest Portlandia fan, most definitely. Satire, true; but affectionate.
Where I am has few services either, and law enforcement's a big joke. Most of us are poor as church mice. The one and only advantage this place has over many others is that every climate model I've seen projects us as one of the more livable (if you stretch the term) places for the next 50-100 years. The wet places will get wetter and the hottest places will get hotter. We're already well out of our comparatively mild drought for several years and far ahead of average rainfall already. Plus I made sure to find somewhere 850' above sea level and at least 300' above the nearest river. Even though we're in Tornado Alley, this particular spot has never taken a hit because of the dramatic change in topography. Twisters bear down on us often enough but the sharp demarcation seems to fend them off.
I hope to live long enough to see the state turn blue again as it once was a real stronghold. Trying to do my best to keep chipping away at it. Don't hold your breath, but do wish us luck.