Reply #87

In the discussion thread: What kind of beans [View all]

Mon Feb 13, 2012, 06:11 PM

alfredo (46,527 posts)

87. The Bloomin Onion from Outback. Brings a tear to my eyes.

I had a friend who prided his ability to tune his gas for sound or smell. He had specific diets for any occasion. One summer a competing bicycle shop was spreading lies about our shop. This friend offered his help. So one hot Saturday we sent him over to get revenge. As luck would have it, their AC was broken, so they enlisted fans to move the air. Our friend, primed with steak, cabbage, onion rings, beer, and pickled eggs, walked into their busy show room. He stood before a big floor fan and released the burning green mists of hell.

He cleared the showroom.

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Replies to this discussion thread

96 replies	Author	Time	Post
What kind of beans [View all]	unionworks	Feb 2012	OP
Some of it is how you cook them	siligut	Feb 2012	#1
first, don't limit yourself to a meal of only beans...throw in some brussel sprouts.	ret5hd	Feb 2012	#2
Oh, so right. For that deadly methane gas, you can't beat the cruciferous vegetables.	siligut	Feb 2012	#4
this is more fun	unionworks	Feb 2012	#10
You started a fart thread, lol.	siligut	Feb 2012	#14
George Carlin	unionworks	Feb 2012	#15
Al Swearengen from Deadwood. "Who cut the cheese?" I'm betting it was EB.	siligut	Feb 2012	#21
thanks	unionworks	Feb 2012	#22
Cucumber for counterpoint burps. n/t	sarge43	Feb 2012	#35
Get them comin' and goin'?	siligut	Feb 2012	#36
Yup.	sarge43	Feb 2012	#38
The greatest fart-off of all time	hifiguy	Feb 2012	#44
Blazing Saddles	alfredo	Feb 2012	#90
and good for you too! n/t	unionworks	Feb 2012	#39
The Bloomin Onion from Outback. Brings a tear to my eyes.	alfredo	Feb 2012	#87
liverwurst and onions	unionworks	Feb 2012	#17
Also...	pipi_k	Feb 2012	#24
my god, you have to be able to walk into work the next day. otherwise it's no fun.	ret5hd	Feb 2012	#25
payday was on thursday	unionworks	Feb 2012	#28
You can still walk...	pipi_k	Feb 2012	#55
Black beans in a can - DO NOT RINSE THEM! The canning juice helps a lot.	HopeHoops	Feb 2012	#3
dark undies	unionworks	Feb 2012	#8
By "worst", you mean volume? Or potency?	JustABozoOnThisBus	Feb 2012	#5
chicken farts	unionworks	Feb 2012	#6
An egg and dairy meal can really help intensify your output.	davsand	Feb 2012	#7
Cheeses	unionworks	Feb 2012	#11
I used to live with a guy who KNEW his stuff on this issue.	davsand	Feb 2012	#16
he should have	unionworks	Feb 2012	#18
Lordy lu, that should be banned by the Geneva Convention.	hifiguy	Feb 2012	#46
Brown eggs?	unionworks	Feb 2012	#61
Hard boiled eggs and beer create an interesting combination	Major Nikon	Feb 2012	#23
Worst Original Post Ever!	FSogol	Feb 2012	#9
Why? It's not advocating any really bad stuff ...	JustABozoOnThisBus	Feb 2012	#12
flatulence	unionworks	Feb 2012	#13
I agree with many other replies here add the cruciferous veggies	geardaddy	Feb 2012	#19
This message was self-deleted by its author	unionworks	Feb 2012	#20
After a night of drinking you need	Angry Dragon	Feb 2012	#26
Totally!	geardaddy	Feb 2012	#37
Homemade split pea soup and apple juice do it for me.	Brickbat	Feb 2012	#27
"Bulldog Gas Problem"?	unionworks	Feb 2012	#29
ROFLMAO!	Brickbat	Feb 2012	#30
your pup	unionworks	Feb 2012	#32
I must click on more DU ads	unionworks	Feb 2012	#43
Boxers are pretty nasty too...	pipi_k	Feb 2012	#56
from what I've been reading	unionworks	Feb 2012	#72
You and Angry Dragon	unionworks	Feb 2012	#31
Lentils.	Chan790	Feb 2012	#33
the legumes with the fumes!	unionworks	Feb 2012	#34
The BESTEST dive bars have ample supplies of pickled eggs & cheap beer.	MiddleFingerMom	Feb 2012	#40
those pickled eggs...	unionworks	Feb 2012	#41
I saw a program on how to make them.	siligut	Feb 2012	#42
Tell you who REALLY knows	unionworks	Feb 2012	#47
Some of them even offered	pipi_k	Feb 2012	#57
Don't forget pickled chicken gizzards.	geardaddy	Feb 2012	#94
Lentils, and I love them, but can only eat them once in a while,	RebelOne	Feb 2012	#45
I also love	unionworks	Feb 2012	#49
Cabbage is much better for that.	hobbit709	Feb 2012	#48
Amazing that the healthiest foods	unionworks	Feb 2012	#50
To inspire you: The Great Crepitation Contest of 1946	LiberalEsto	Feb 2012	#51
May you always	unionworks	Feb 2012	#52
As a special treat, Estonian sauerkraut soup for you!	LiberalEsto	Feb 2012	#62
truly mouthwatering	unionworks	Feb 2012	#63
None of them.	GoCubsGo	Feb 2012	#53
Peppers	unionworks	Feb 2012	#54
I have to thank	pipi_k	Feb 2012	#58
I have nominated	unionworks	Feb 2012	#60
It's only the bell peppers that do it.	GoCubsGo	Feb 2012	#78
It's an unsolved mystery	unionworks	Feb 2012	#79
No science nerd answer yet? Allow me.	deucemagnet	Feb 2012	#59
Do you now	unionworks	Feb 2012	#64
No, but I am looking for a new job right now.	deucemagnet	Feb 2012	#66
Jeez	unionworks	Feb 2012	#67
Oh, I have nothing to complain about.	deucemagnet	Feb 2012	#70
I have a friend	unionworks	Feb 2012	#73
Well, I've been told...	pintobean	Feb 2012	#65
I'm not even	unionworks	Feb 2012	#68
Interesting fun facts	unionworks	Feb 2012	#69
Wild Kingdom	unionworks	Feb 2012	#71
Airline Stewards farting as they walk down the aisle is called "Crop Dusting."	alfredo	Feb 2012	#89
LOL	geardaddy	Feb 2012	#95
I've been stopping in	pintobean	Feb 2012	#74
I'm relatively new	unionworks	Feb 2012	#76
Is this a great thread or what? nt	flying rabbit	Feb 2012	#75
it's a gas	unionworks	Feb 2012	#77
Nothing like hotdog farts	felix_numinous	Feb 2012	#80
there was a scene	unionworks	Feb 2012	#82
Schlitz beer is the perfect thing to use.	madinmaryland	Feb 2012	#81
long ago	unionworks	Feb 2012	#84
Red beans	av8rdave	Feb 2012	#83
this is wierd	unionworks	Feb 2012	#85
Heh ... Google "ham and motherfuckers" ... nt	eppur_se_muova	Feb 2012	#86
a generally despised	unionworks	Feb 2012	#91
Not a vet myself -- heard about this from DU vets. :^) nt	eppur_se_muova	Feb 2012	#93
My brother	unionworks	Feb 2012	#96
Beans are like children. They should be seen and not heard.	yellowcanine	Feb 2012	#88
"Beans, beans, they're good for your heart. The more you eat the more you fart..."	HopeHoops	Feb 2012	#92

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