Reply #93

In the discussion thread: A man keeps giving small presents to my 5-year-old daughter, and it's freaking me out. [View all]

Response to raccoon (Reply #90)

Sun Jun 10, 2012, 09:11 AM

Honeycombe8 (18,006 posts)

93. I don't use anecdotes as substitutes for facts. If you use anecdotes,

then Chrysler is the most reliable make of cars made, or Chevy, or (insert name here), rather than the statistically-proven reliability ratings of Toyota, Honda, and Subaru.

Yes, there have always been pervs. There has always been cancer. But there are more instances now. You can "think" that's because they're reported more now. But that's just a thought and not a fact.

Fact: There are many mroe cases of child abuse and molestation than 50 years ago.

Fact: There are many more cases of cancer now than 50 years ago.

Reply to this post

Back to OP Alert abuse Link to post in-thread

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum

Replies to this discussion thread

149 replies	Author	Time	Post
A man keeps giving small presents to my 5-year-old daughter, and it's freaking me out. [View all]	Liberal_in_LA	Jun 2012	OP
Your child is your #1 priority	sarisataka	Jun 2012	#1
I agree with everything you've said	Number23	Jun 2012	#69
It's not appropriate for him to give her gifts. Tell him and others that it's a rule: no presents!	SharonAnn	Jun 2012	#123
Sadly today one never knows.	SoutherDem	Jun 2012	#2
You need a woman to accompany to you to the bookstore - a reverse of that sharia stuff	Liberal_in_LA	Jun 2012	#3
Better yet I go to Barnes & Noble	SoutherDem	Jun 2012	#19
You can buy gifts for your nieces--this old guy is NO RELATION to the little girl.	MADem	Jun 2012	#7
The OP said a bookstore did not allow men to go to the children's area	SoutherDem	Jun 2012	#18
Here's what I think.	MADem	Jun 2012	#47
I would bet good money that's what was going on with the old guy kicked out	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#72
Yes, you got it in one. That's it precisely.	MADem	Jun 2012	#74
The old guy in the bookstore was sitting on the floor in the children's area, talking on the phone.	redqueen	Jun 2012	#107
This thread reeks of paranoia...	Cave_Johnson	Jun 2012	#94
No, it reeks of naivete..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#99
No--I think it reeks of reality. There are a lot of perverts out there. Twenty years ago it	MADem	Jun 2012	#104
+1	redqueen	Jun 2012	#108
There have been a rash of stories in the past 10 years or more	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#111
Well, you go on ahead and put aside your instincts, now.	MADem	Jun 2012	#112
Ah the old "gut reaction"	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#113
Well, you're free to extrapolate your own experience, but that's not mine.	MADem	Jun 2012	#121
" If your gut feeds you racism and sexism, that's on you." That's an . . . interesting spn	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#131
Complete nonsense	pipoman	Jun 2012	#37
Well, yes it did happen when I was a kid	SoutherDem	Jun 2012	#50
It is different	pipoman	Jun 2012	#92
Yes the OP does not give a lot of detail	SoutherDem	Jun 2012	#109
Yes, there are more pervs today. If only because there are more people.	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#82
Disagree--I think there were proportionally just as many pervs in the past,	raccoon	Jun 2012	#90
I don't use anecdotes as substitutes for facts. If you use anecdotes,	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#93
There are many more REPORTED cases of child abuse and molestation than	raccoon	Jun 2012	#96
Fact: There are more people in the country now than 50 years ago.	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#125
Fact: the terms "date rape" and "acquaintance rape" didn't exist about 40 years ago.	raccoon	Jun 2012	#141
No..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#97
I didn't realize there were so many people in denial about this issue.	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#128
And I didn't realize	pipoman	Jun 2012	#134
You are ridiculously oversimplifying things	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#135
Logical fallacy	Dash87	Jun 2012	#115
You can "think" whatever you want are the reasons. That's not a fact.	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#127
There are more cases of workplace discrimination based on race/gender today in the 50s.	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#116
I never said we should strive to go back in time. Reading skills are important. nt	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#126
No, you just made the absurd claim that because there are more cases now that means	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#130
Great post, and that applies also to rape, incest, child beating,	raccoon	Jun 2012	#89
I remember back in the 1970's	pipoman	Jun 2012	#95
I would be very concerned and would be having conversation with your parents about this. Better	teddy51	Jun 2012	#4
I think those parents should trust their gut. When I go with mine, I'm never wrong. When I ignore	MADem	Jun 2012	#5
your gif is awesome..by the way	Liberal_in_LA	Jun 2012	#6
Thanks--he looks like a cat we had for over two decades.	MADem	Jun 2012	#9
agreed. Go with your gut.	magical thyme	Jun 2012	#33
Bush went with his GUT FEELINGS also. n-t	Logical	Jun 2012	#44
His gut was raddled by alcohol, though! It's not the same! nt	MADem	Jun 2012	#45
Bush was a sociopath who didn't have feelings of concern.	riderinthestorm	Jun 2012	#59
I agree that the parents should trust their gut instincts.	Gormy Cuss	Jun 2012	#51
Once again, you and I are on the same page	Number23	Jun 2012	#70
+1,000 nt	MADem	Jun 2012	#75
I think the reason	ohheckyeah	Jun 2012	#8
I wouldn't hesitate to say something! Mom-alarm-bells are a warning	riderinthestorm	Jun 2012	#10
that particular issue - this women has genuine reasons to restrict access to her daughter	RainDog	Jun 2012	#11
Warn your parents!!!	Rosa Luxemburg	Jun 2012	#12
It could be innocent - it could be something else	aint_no_life_nowhere	Jun 2012	#13
No harm in following your instincts on this sort of thing.	JDPriestly	Jun 2012	#14
I agree that this sounds like grooming	XemaSab	Jun 2012	#15
I agree.	laundry_queen	Jun 2012	#21
Ok fine but please don't generalize about grandparents. They are no more inattentive than parents	yellowcanine	Jun 2012	#42
Err on the side of caution.	Zanzoobar	Jun 2012	#16
She's hyperventilating over a seashell?	pscot	Jun 2012	#17
If Maurice Chevalier were singing this song today,	Art_from_Ark	Jun 2012	#31
Now what if one were to drive around town blasting this little diddy	MattBaggins	Jun 2012	#41
Just a couple of years ago, my granddaughters' ballet recital featured them dancing to	CTyankee	Jun 2012	#52
Gigi was about grooming a 15 year old girl for prostitution.	aquart	Jun 2012	#88
No, didn't sound that way to me..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#38
Mass hysteria	pscot	Jun 2012	#55
I am an old fart..no ageism...talk about seeing things not there..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#64
I find it odd that the gifts are not for both children. That also sends alarms for me. I disagree	IndyJones	Jun 2012	#20
You give a shell to a two-year-old,	Art_from_Ark	Jun 2012	#26
I have three kids and they didn't put shells in their mouths.	IndyJones	Jun 2012	#27
I've known 2-year-olds who would put anything and everything in their mouths	Art_from_Ark	Jun 2012	#32
Okay, and back to the OP...	IndyJones	Jun 2012	#63
better safe than sorry	danadevin85	Jun 2012	#22
If the parents ever let the kid out of their sight, they are not doing their job.	xfundy	Jun 2012	#23
it simply is not appropriate, with or without your uneasy feelings	Skittles	Jun 2012	#24
You're absolutely correct. I wouldn't give a child a gift without first asking the parents.	IndyJones	Jun 2012	#28
A rock, a feather, a shell.	enlightenment	Jun 2012	#29
"Not precisely the crown jewels." No but gifts a 5 year old would appreciate more than jewels.	yellowcanine	Jun 2012	#43
A "public letter that tries and convicts?" It's an anonymous letter to an advice columnist.	MADem	Jun 2012	#54
Thank you. Some of the responses to this have been bizarre	Number23	Jun 2012	#71
When both parents smell a rat, you gotta sit up and take notice.	MADem	Jun 2012	#76
the best comment in the whole thread	Sea-Dog	Jun 2012	#67
Prudie's an idiot.	Prometheus Bound	Jun 2012	#25
Agree completely..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#101
This message was self-deleted by its author	markpkessinger	Jun 2012	#129
Is the reason she and her hubby are "totally creeped out" because of the gifts? Or is it	Happyhippychick	Jun 2012	#30
We have a pesky sixth sense, that tingle on our necks, for a reason	justiceischeap	Jun 2012	#34
I disagree with Prudence's response on this one. The parents should listen to their instincts.	yardwork	Jun 2012	#35
At a Loss and her husband are both lunatics	alcibiades_mystery	Jun 2012	#36
Only a lunitic would make such a statement	pipoman	Jun 2012	#40
I suspect her suspicion is less about the gifts	pipoman	Jun 2012	#39
Exactly. Read Protecting the Gift by Gavin De Becker.	Butterbean	Jun 2012	#46
I believe that is the key..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#48
If it was me	Aerows	Jun 2012	#49
Talk to your parents about having a "Discovery Day" at their home...	Tikki	Jun 2012	#53
My gut feeling is that the parents are overreacting.	Comrade Grumpy	Jun 2012	#56
Maybe when	pipoman	Jun 2012	#66
It is simply not appropriate to give gifts to minor children in these cases.	SharonAnn	Jun 2012	#122
Flashing RED light	Nancy Waterman	Jun 2012	#57
Remind me to always yell at the kids...	BiggJawn	Jun 2012	#58
I wouldn't use the word "fuck" though	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#60
I had a discussion with an ex boyfriend about helping a child in distress, say a lost child.	Quantess	Jun 2012	#61
Men will always be a sexual suspect in such circumstances	marshall	Jun 2012	#68
Right, because we're MEN, y'know? And we always think with our dicks, y'know?	BiggJawn	Jun 2012	#73
Your church is full of morons. That school is full of idiots, too.	MADem	Jun 2012	#77
that show "what would you do" put a lost child on the street, crying to people "I'm lost"	Liberal_in_LA	Jun 2012	#78
He is a super nice guy, and very helpful in general. More considerate than most!	Quantess	Jun 2012	#80
Listen to your warning sirens.	revolution breeze	Jun 2012	#62
its a sad world when any and all acts of kindness is looked upon as sinister and insidious	Sea-Dog	Jun 2012	#65
agreed n/t	Liberal_in_LA	Jun 2012	#79
+1	sarcasmo	Jun 2012	#81
It's not kindness to give a gift to one child & leave the other out.	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#83
i wouldn't give a 2 year old a shell would you?	Sea-Dog	Jun 2012	#85
Why would you single out one of the many gifts the neighbor brought/bought the child?	Honeycombe8	Jun 2012	#87
i wouldn't hand a feather or a rock to a 2 year old either would you?	Sea-Dog	Jun 2012	#98
This thread just shows how badly we've stereotyped men in this society....	eek MD	Jun 2012	#84
Back when I was a kid	XanaDUer	Jun 2012	#91
What if this guy	pipoman	Jun 2012	#138
Like not accepting gifts from strangers?	pipoman	Jun 2012	#100
So I take it you won't let your kids eat candy on Halloween?	eek MD	Jun 2012	#133
We always took our kids to neighborhoods	pipoman	Jun 2012	#136
"gut instincts"	eek MD	Jun 2012	#137
Or it may save her child's life or innocence..	pipoman	Jun 2012	#139
Your critique of my parenting abilities as detrimental is noted...and rejected...	eek MD	Jun 2012	#140
If this person were a woman it would be a story about the nice woman	4th law of robotics	Jun 2012	#110
We're a very stereotyped society	Dash87	Jun 2012	#117
Isn't that called "grooming behavior"?	aquart	Jun 2012	#86
Not necessarily wrong. Especially since the gifts are things like feathers and rocks.	alphafemale	Jun 2012	#102
holy shit...one paragraph off a little known advice column and a mob jury gets formed	tjwash	Jun 2012	#103
Tell your parent under no circumstances are your girls allowed to be alone with the neighbors. That	Pisces	Jun 2012	#105
Well, this could be a cause for concern or just some nice old folks.	MineralMan	Jun 2012	#106
There's not enough context, but always trust your instincts.	Dash87	Jun 2012	#114
I have subscribed to the theory that red flags go up for a reason	HillWilliam	Jun 2012	#118
Have a little more insight.	Life Long Dem	Jun 2012	#119
the fact something is given to on exclusively, alone, would have me saying, knock it the fuck off	seabeyond	Jun 2012	#120
Read this Book:	Mira	Jun 2012	#124
As for the bookstore thing . . .	markpkessinger	Jun 2012	#132
Amen, brother!	SaB2012	Jun 2012	#145
Wow. It's a shame people treat men this way, especially on DU	cbdo2007	Jun 2012	#142
He only gives balloons to one child in particular, at the expense of all others...?	LanternWaste	Jun 2012	#148
I wasn't making a direct comparison....you're missing the point.	cbdo2007	Jun 2012	#149
Back in my hometown	SaB2012	Jun 2012	#143
there's a big difference between a 5 year old and a 2 year old....	cbdo2007	Jun 2012	#147
To everyone calling this "grooming"	SaB2012	Jun 2012	#144
More often than not, I'll give a mom any benefit of the doubt	LanternWaste	Jun 2012	#146

Edit History

Please login to view edit histories.