General Discussion

Aerows

(39,961 posts)

95. That's sexual assault

Tue Apr 10, 2012, 09:29 AM

Apr 2012

If you are unconscious, you aren't consenting.

Guys can avoid crossing the line by keeping it in their pants until a woman says she wants it.

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This message was self-deleted by its author [View all] moriah Apr 2012 OP

Sexual assault. You said that sex was off the table that night... NYC_SKP Apr 2012 #1

Yep I was going to say... Taverner Apr 2012 #65

Totally agree. UnrepentantLiberal Apr 2012 #101

He totally crossed the line. In fact he sprinted past it. Drunk and asleep means no consent could be peacebird Apr 2012 #2

The line is way way way in the distance. Your ex friend is an asshole. Warren Stupidity Apr 2012 #3

call the cops warrior1 Apr 2012 #4

he knew what he was doing. and he figured he would get what he wanted seabeyond Apr 2012 #5

Ditto. He knew exactly what he was doing. Don't fall for his "explanations." Honeycombe8 Apr 2012 #36

Report it.... eek MD Apr 2012 #6

You were raped. richmwill Apr 2012 #7

The guy's a jerk and you'd likely have a case but... Gman Apr 2012 #8

This is a rather flippant response... eek MD Apr 2012 #13

Well said, eek MD. nt Chorophyll Apr 2012 #38

Unfortunately the world isn't full of entirely good people. mythology Apr 2012 #42

this wasnt a frat house of strangers, but a friends house. seabeyond Apr 2012 #77

My answer is no more flippant than telling someone not to go walk around in a high crime area Gman Apr 2012 #85

BS..... eek MD Apr 2012 #86

So, basically you're saying is "don't get drunk around men, because it's not their ScreamingMeemie Apr 2012 #104

He raped you. You were not capable of consenting. Nye Bevan Apr 2012 #9

You trusted someone you believed was a friend varelse Apr 2012 #10

Exactly. nt. polly7 Apr 2012 #34

This message was self-deleted by its author slampoet Apr 2012 #11

There are several posters here that think what he did was A-OK! Odin2005 Apr 2012 #12

What are you talking about? Warren Stupidity Apr 2012 #19

another thread, another time. the woman didnt say no. drunk passed out seabeyond Apr 2012 #22

Now I have no clue what you are talking about either, other than it has nothing to Warren Stupidity Apr 2012 #25

yes, it sounded like this thread. "here" i think, referred to du. i get you dont seabeyond Apr 2012 #30

I am trying to find the legal term for "unable to provide consent" Taverner Apr 2012 #68

There was a thread way back about a movie scene with this same situation. Odin2005 Apr 2012 #40

Oh so "here" doesn't mean this thread and "posters" doesn't mean anyone posting in this thread. Warren Stupidity Apr 2012 #44

Some people can never let go JNelson6563 Apr 2012 #96

Really? Which ones? Taverner Apr 2012 #66

If you are not conscious, LadyHawkAZ Apr 2012 #14

It seems to be okay to rape someone if you're drunk and the female is drunk... liberalmuse Apr 2012 #15

but bigapple Apr 2012 #16

Are you implying that there's never anyone who initiates sex? eek MD Apr 2012 #18

This message was self-deleted by its author moriah Apr 2012 #20

in your case bigapple Apr 2012 #21

When in doubt.... eek MD Apr 2012 #26

one was awake, one was not. a huge ass duh.... nt seabeyond Apr 2012 #23

I'd say WAY past "sexual assault" into "rape" saras Apr 2012 #17

You said no before the night even got underway. Chorophyll Apr 2012 #24

I'll tell you what, moriah alcibiades_mystery Apr 2012 #27

You're absolutely not an idiot and you didn't do anything wrong. He's a rapist, petronius Apr 2012 #28

You did tell him at the very beginning SheilaT Apr 2012 #29

You were not an idiot, you drew the line early on perfectly clear when you stated no sexual contact. polly7 Apr 2012 #31

You're in Arkansas? panader0 Apr 2012 #32

This message was self-deleted by its author moriah Apr 2012 #37

For me, it's easy. I would never have sex with an unconscious woman MineralMan Apr 2012 #33

Just a bit of info, MM. For those of us not doing a "view all" the only thing I saw was... madinmaryland Apr 2012 #35

Well, that should get people to read the whole thing, MineralMan Apr 2012 #50

you're allowed to get as drunk as you want. That doesn't mean rape is allowed. provis99 Apr 2012 #39

Exactly Taverner Apr 2012 #73

he crossed the line, but you put yourself in danger bart95 Apr 2012 #41

You're basically telling Moriah not to bother to take action. Chorophyll Apr 2012 #51

no i'm not, i'm telling her to brace herself if she does bart95 Apr 2012 #54

and i aplogise if my tone was a little cold, there was a lot of material there to get through bart95 Apr 2012 #56

Are you talking to me, or to Moriah? Chorophyll Apr 2012 #61

'The responsibility needs to be on the men.' bart95 Apr 2012 #62

This message was self-deleted by its author moriah Apr 2012 #70

consider a restraining/no-contact order bart95 Apr 2012 #72

I second the vote for restraining order Taverner Apr 2012 #75

You should at the very least tell him you're thinking UnrepentantLiberal Apr 2012 #102

"She was asking for it!!" Taverner Apr 2012 #74

You are a bad person. sudopod Apr 2012 #88

He definitely crossed the line. nt ZombieHorde Apr 2012 #43

This was rape, no doubt about it justiceischeap Apr 2012 #45

Why is it difficult to get it that having sex with an unconscious person is non consensual lunatica Apr 2012 #46

because this is exactly how women are conditioned in this society TorchTheWitch Apr 2012 #55

I wish I could K&R your post TW! Texasgal Apr 2012 #64

+1.... nt seabeyond Apr 2012 #78

As soon as he admitted he did not have your consent. There is your line. nt Snake Alchemist Apr 2012 #47

If you did not wake up---he would have continued.... trumad Apr 2012 #48

+1,000,000,000,000,000,000 Odin2005 Apr 2012 #49

Yep Taverner Apr 2012 #67

"Too drunk" is not relevant to the discussion. lapislzi Apr 2012 #52

you and me both TorchTheWitch Apr 2012 #59

I spent years torturing myself lapislzi Apr 2012 #63

Exactly. None of this is her fault. Taverner Apr 2012 #71

Ewww.... bighughdiehl Apr 2012 #53

Jesus Christ. BlueIris Apr 2012 #57

So terrible sorry this happened to you. jp11 Apr 2012 #58

a 100% guaranteed way not to cross the line is by... LanternWaste Apr 2012 #60

Let me add you were not an idiot for getting that intoxicated Taverner Apr 2012 #69

When you start it off with "sex is off the table"..... MrSlayer Apr 2012 #76

I read all the responses and your response below, also adigal Apr 2012 #79

This message was self-deleted by its author moriah Apr 2012 #80

Oh, sorry, but as an ex-drinker, I know lots about blackouts adigal Apr 2012 #81

Agreed. Blackouts are scary. lapislzi Apr 2012 #99

oh baloney! TorchTheWitch Apr 2012 #82

I was just going by what the OP said adigal Apr 2012 #83

This message was self-deleted by its author moriah Apr 2012 #87

Please don't misunderstand me...your drinking in no way gave him permission to rape you adigal Apr 2012 #92

<--- Is a pillow thief Aerows Apr 2012 #97

This message was self-deleted by its author aikoaiko Apr 2012 #90

Date rape is not a lesser degree of rape lapislzi Apr 2012 #94

WAY over the line Locrian Apr 2012 #84

Your case is nowhere near the line and your "friend" is a serious rapist. JVS Apr 2012 #89

This situation was nowhere close to the 'line'. Chemisse Apr 2012 #91

Don't trust him again. Ever. gkhouston Apr 2012 #93

That's sexual assault Aerows Apr 2012 #95

The line is where you want it to be. You have a legal case against him. redgreenandblue Apr 2012 #98

I know you're asking an intellectual discussion question here, but on a personal level... aikoaiko Apr 2012 #100

He is calling and texting because you caught him in a criminal act and you could file charges. Xedniw Apr 2012 #103

This message was self-deleted by its author moriah Apr 2012 #105

I would define that as sexual assault. Totally unacceptable what that guy did. DutchLiberal Apr 2012 #106