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JDPriestly

(57,936 posts)
94. Sums it up.
Sun Oct 14, 2012, 01:25 PM
Oct 2012

Judging from what I saw at a college recently, you may also be Republican if you are young, a business major and believe that you, too, will be rich one day (even though you are majoring in business because you can't do math).

And you may be Republican if you are a college co-ed hoping to marry rich so that you don't have to ever really teach school and you joined the Republican Club on campus so you could meet a young Republican who is a business major, believes he will be rich one day and can't add two plus two.

And in the latter case, you may be a Republican because you think Republican guys are the ideal candidate for a fat alimony settlements if you divorce them.

You may be a republican if... [View all] porphyrian Oct 2012 OP
You post you maybe threads! whistler162 Oct 2012 #1
-1 L0oniX Oct 2012 #114
Ha! porphyrian Oct 2012 #117
...you judge patriotism by the number of American flags and ribbon magnets someone has. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #2
...you insist the media is liberal until it says something you like. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #3
And completely miss the ludicrous paradox of doing so. Indpndnt Oct 2012 #78
Thanks. porphyrian Oct 2012 #81
...you believe you engender Christianity in your hatred of homosexuals, Muslims, compassion... n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #4
...you go out of your way to destroy an Obama sign, then complain that Biden was a "bully." n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #5
...you preach intolerance of homosexuality, then get caught with meth and a male prostitute. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #6
Or you hate children, old people, in between people, sick people, homeless people, animals, the lonestarnot Oct 2012 #7
. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #10
I have a few. Tennessee Gal Oct 2012 #8
Good. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #11
Good, but small correction. Romney hasn't even release two years' of full tax returns. yardwork Oct 2012 #109
You may be a republican if... Flashmann Oct 2012 #9
Heh. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #12
....if whatever Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh says... RichGirl Oct 2012 #13
Nice. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #18
...you cannot offer a definition of socialism, communism, Marxism or even capitalism begin_within Oct 2012 #14
...or be bothered to look any of them up. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #20
... protecting your values means making the values of others illegal. tarheelsunc Oct 2012 #15
! n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #21
the TRUTH! 2theleft Oct 2012 #55
THIS! liberalmuse Oct 2012 #77
...there is a sawhorse with a piece of carpet over it in your driveway for 12 years begin_within Oct 2012 #16
Ha! I had that neighbor... n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #22
...you believe Fox News isn't "fair and balanced," it's too damn liberal! n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #17
You may be a republican if... theKed Oct 2012 #19
Right? n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #23
Now DAMMIT!! Flashmann Oct 2012 #24
...you think that going to church for 1 hour on Sunday makes up for what you did during the week begin_within Oct 2012 #25
Bible Belters go on Wednesday, too, just in case. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #26
Hey..I recognize that Flashmann Oct 2012 #28
You may be a republican if... gr8dane_daddy Oct 2012 #27
Surely none of these would run for office, though... n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #30
Surely none of these would run for office Flashmann Oct 2012 #34
And if they did, surely the voters pscot Oct 2012 #97
Oh.....Yes.....Of course.... Flashmann Oct 2012 #98
...you are in favor of tax cuts for the rich because you are sure that someday you will be rich begin_within Oct 2012 #29
They think that right up until they retire and try to live on Social Security and Medicare. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #31
At first I thought I fit one criteria. lalalu Oct 2012 #32
Sorry about that. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #36
LOL, I am just kidding you. lalalu Oct 2012 #44
Thanks. porphyrian Oct 2012 #46
...you are alive to call the French "cowards" because people in the Underground died saving your... porphyrian Oct 2012 #33
you keep up the premise that tax cuts are a miracle cure for every ill ... zbdent Oct 2012 #35
If only they cured hypocrisy. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #38
...your forwarded e-mail messages display all the recipients, and include all previous forwardings begin_within Oct 2012 #37
Hey, now, that's an effective way to stop those e-mails, too. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #39
LMAO! Flashmann Oct 2012 #42
They get back the emails they forwarded themselves treestar Oct 2012 #56
...and can't figure out why or how to change it begin_within Oct 2012 #62
Awesome thread, thanx for posting x n/t darkangel218 Oct 2012 #40
Thank you. porphyrian Oct 2012 #41
...you believe all welfare should be cut, as long as you aren't getting it yourself. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #43
and the "nee-grows" and "mex-hi-cans" aren't. n/t Risen Demon Oct 2012 #102
Right, no brown people at all. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #140
...you think we should be drilling for fossil fuels in national parks to bring down gas prices... porphyrian Oct 2012 #45
If you outsource jobs to China and make money off that and are a defendant in an anti-trust suit. lonestarnot Oct 2012 #50
Hmm...I wonder what his taxes show... n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #51
You mean the ones we will NEVER see? lonestarnot Oct 2012 #54
Surely he has nothing to hide... n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #58
No, he's paying someone to do that for him. lonestarnot Oct 2012 #72
... porphyrian Oct 2012 #80
He's a "creator." lonestarnot Oct 2012 #85
He really is. He creates bullshit. He creates conspiracy. He creates comedy routines... n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #87
Bullshit Mountain and in a real way, it is not comedy, but reality. lonestarnot Oct 2012 #154
Sad, but true. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #155
...you believe you're a patriot, but actively try to disenfranchise American voters. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #47
...you practially worship the military, until the soldiers come home wounded or traumatized. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #48
...you would rather subsidize a multimillion dollar corporation than give a poor single mother... porphyrian Oct 2012 #49
I especially love this one. liberalmuse Oct 2012 #82
The Reagan years were the first time I noticed homeless people on the streets. porphyrian Oct 2012 #84
...your definition of "liberal media" is ABC, CNN, NBC and MSNBC begin_within Oct 2012 #52
...you believe anything that comes out of Paul Ryan's mouth. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #53
...you vote against tax increases yet complain that government services are inadequate begin_within Oct 2012 #57
Maybe they think the Santa Ana winds are part of the liberal global warming conspiracy to raise... porphyrian Oct 2012 #61
wouldn't surprise me, begin_within Oct 2012 #67
... porphyrian Oct 2012 #143
subversive to progress and human decency JackN415 Oct 2012 #59
Republicans or this thread? n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #66
republican philosophy, modus operandi in one word = subversive JackN415 Oct 2012 #73
Check. Thanks. porphyrian Oct 2012 #75
you think corporations are people, too. 2theleft Oct 2012 #60
! n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #63
yep, you might be a republican if you believe newspeak Oct 2012 #83
you push adoption instead of abortion, but you have never adotped or fostered one of thousands.. 2theleft Oct 2012 #64
...and don't want tax revenue to pay for them, either. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #69
You believe that YOU will still be able to take advantage of the "safety net".... YoungDemCA Oct 2012 #65
No office for them! n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #68
You own guns and hunt but also vote for people that will boot you out of your favorite brewens Oct 2012 #70
Right? Why would a corporation clear cut and pave over ten acres of forest? porphyrian Oct 2012 #71
...you spend hours each day ranting about society's parasites from your room at your mother's house. porphyrian Oct 2012 #74
...you talk authoritatively about things Jesus hates. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #76
You worship Jesus, but loathe everything He practiced and preached. Indpndnt Oct 2012 #93
Right on. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #103
...you defend corporations' rights to fire employees, are anti-union, anti-Obamacare... porphyrian Oct 2012 #79
...you have no problem with everything Romney says being corrected later by his spokespeople. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #86
...your children have been busted multiple times with crack in a zero tolerance state... porphyrian Oct 2012 #88
...you believe that privatizing something will make it cost less to you begin_within Oct 2012 #89
Empirical data states the opposite, but they don't let the facts get in the way of doctrine. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #105
...you believe that if something horrible happens to someone, "it's God's will" begin_within Oct 2012 #90
That one's particularly offensive. They use it to justify their successes, too. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #106
...if a Democratic politician does something wrong, they need to be crucified, but if a Republican begin_within Oct 2012 #91
Newt Gingrich was a contender for republican candidate. Family values? 'Nuff said. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #107
Recommended. William769 Oct 2012 #92
Thanks. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #108
Sums it up. JDPriestly Oct 2012 #94
Aren't young republicans so introspective and deep? n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #110
Sorry about my horrid grammar in that post. JDPriestly Oct 2012 #146
No problem. porphyrian Oct 2012 #147
You blame teachers LWolf Oct 2012 #95
Long enough to bust their unions and end tenure, anyway. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #111
You can perform a colonoscopy on yourself by simply opening your eyes. 11 Bravo Oct 2012 #96
Ha! porphyrian Oct 2012 #104
You attack the wrong country VWolf Oct 2012 #99
"They tried to kill my daddy!" n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #112
...you scream bloody murder about nonexistent Democratic voter fraud meow2u3 Oct 2012 #100
They're still under investigation, I understand. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #113
...if HYPOCRISY is your middle name We People Oct 2012 #101
Everyone is a hypocrite at times, but it's so much more obnoxious to be a self-righteous hypocrite. porphyrian Oct 2012 #116
..the only font you know is Arial and all your memes were done in MS Paint begin_within Oct 2012 #115
I'm not sure they're aware of how to change the font, anyway. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #118
...spelling is optional on your protest sign. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #119
...you throw tantrums over how much tax money is wasted on things that spend less than 1%. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #120
You believe your party is for liberty CheapShotArtist Oct 2012 #121
! n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #122
...you refuse to sit next to Jon Sununu and know why. porphyrian Oct 2012 #123
You may be a republican... MizzM Oct 2012 #124
They don't want tax dollars paying for all of those cosmetic abortions! n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #126
...you see nothing wrong with coercing your employees to vote the way you want them to. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #125
...you think class warfare is illegal begin_within Oct 2012 #127
...you have not mentioned G. W. Bush at all in 2012. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #128
This message was self-deleted by its author DireStrike Oct 2012 #129
Socialists vs. Communists is actually a complicated issue DireStrike Oct 2012 #130
They would have turned off as soon as you said "Marx." porphyrian Oct 2012 #131
...you need a convenient excuse to hang out with the openly racist. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #132
...you blame the President for not creating jobs instead of the obstructionist republicans... porphyrian Oct 2012 #133
...it's easier for you to believe that "illegal immigrants stole your job" than... porphyrian Oct 2012 #134
They took er jaaabs! Risen Demon Oct 2012 #141
... porphyrian Oct 2012 #142
you eat your own poo! n/t guardian Oct 2012 #135
Some dog owners won't like that one. porphyrian Oct 2012 #136
...you spend more time worrying about how others use their genetalia than how much you use yours.n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #137
...you support drone strikes, charter schools, Bonobo Oct 2012 #138
...you think lynching an empty chair from your tree in the South is a funny political statement. porphyrian Oct 2012 #139
... your shoe size is five points higher than your IQ Bozita Oct 2012 #144
They don't believe in numbers unless they are in their bank account. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #148
You think it's treasonous for anyone to criticize the president during a time of war...but only bluethruandthru Oct 2012 #145
Why do they hate America? porphyrian Oct 2012 #149
You may be a republican if... Arkansas Granny Oct 2012 #150
...and disregard the parts that contradict what you believe. porphyrian Oct 2012 #151
...you believe grandma is OK with using coupons to get her Medicare. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #152
...you home school your children to protect them from the theory of evolution. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #153
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