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Flying Squirrel

Profile Information

Member since: Fri Aug 20, 2010, 06:40 PM
Number of posts: 1,540

About Me

I am the same DU member who formerly posted under the name FlyingSquirrel (no space). I killed this profile by changing both my password and email at a time when I felt I had developed an unhealthy addiction to the internet in general and DU in particular. Not sayin' I'm any better now ;-)

Journal Archives

'Tis the season for depression

And I'm a depressive. I take medication for it, but that only goes so far - when the days get shorter and the cloud cover stays around for weeks and even months at a time (Seattle) things get worse for me. That one less hour of daylight in the afternoon is a killer.

So, I must bid farewell again, as I periodically do - I tend to let negativity in moreso than positivity, and there's too much negativity on DU to expose myself to it during this time. Plus, just the sheer volume of information - good or bad - tends to overwhelm me, which is another trigger. It also sucks up time which I could be using to do more constructive things - again, contributing to my depression.

I've enjoyed compiling the DUzy awards, and maybe I'll do it again someday - but for now, the reins are officially out of my hands.

Bye all!

Posted by Flying Squirrel | Wed Nov 6, 2013, 08:29 PM (6 replies)

*** It's the Wacky Wednesday DUzy Awards... Severe Image(s) Warning this week! ***



Special thanks to everyone who contributed to this edition, either by responding to a post with "DUzy" in the subject line or by sending me a PM. The DUzy awards couldn't happen without you!



On an OP by boston bean  

Retort when conservatives call the Democratic Party the Democrat Party


Retort with the Con Party or Cons or The Cons. Afterall, it just short hand for conservative. No harm meant by it.

Jackpine Radical  

1. And they're dominated by males, so

I say it's the Con Men Party.

LaydeeBug  

20. Nope. I say REPUBLIC PARTY. And they *notice*. They notice everytime.


When they try to correct me, I give it right back. 

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023925551


OP by 53tammy  

LARGE HOUSE! LOTS OF ROOM! RECENTLY OPEN!


A funny ad from the best of Craigslist 

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/wdc/4102714495.html

 LARGE HOUSE! LOTS OF ROOM! RECENTLY OPEN!

So my roommates all left because of a job thing and I need to make rent. I really think this place is great and I've been living here for a while (incumbency FTW!). I don't want to leave but the utilities are a real bitch to afford on your own. Some facts about the digs:

It's about 775,000 square feet. Yeah, it's big, I know. But don't let the size alone fool you! It's cozy too--lots of individual rooms!

Location, location, location. It's close to everything you could possibly want. The Botanical Gardens (they're temporarily closed, but don't let that stop you); the metro, and plenty of bars. The bars are important, because what else are we gonna do?

It's historic too! It was built in like 1800 something. Don't ask me the specifics, there's a plaque somewhere. Let's just say it's pretty sweet. There are plenty of cool things inside, like a giant statue of King Kamehameha I. It makes for weird midnight runs to the bathroom, but whatever.

Wanna know more just ask!

About you: Must be LGBT friendly. Must not be a Republican. Don't be racist. Don't hate women. Must think poor Americans are people.

Oh, and don't be an Eagles fan, because, gross.

cats are OK - purrr
dogs are OK - wooof
Location: Capitol Hill
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests



NewJeffCT  

1. good ad


I'll have to see what I can scrape together for an offer, but the heating & cooling costs for something that big must be a bear. 

Chan790  

2. It's all about controlling costs.


Close doors. Don't heat unused rooms. Burn John Boehner's furniture for heat rather than use the furnace. (The stuff probably contains enough gin-sweat to burn for days.)

NewJeffCT  

3. well, I figure


if I allow 535 congressional reps and senators in, I will have enough hot air to heat the place - and then some.

dixiegrrrrl  

4. has 35 bathrooms, btw....

Chan790  

6. That doesn't seem like nearly enough...


for 535 members of Congress, the majority of whom are utterly full of shit.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018503249


On an OP by Archae  

Virginia Tea Party leader says Cuccinelli isn't conservative enough...


 does he want? 

This looks more like CYA, the Teabaggers can then whine after Cooch loses, to claim he "wasn't conservative enough" to win. 

http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/tea-party-leader-ultraconservative-ken-cuccinelli-not-conservative-enough

SummerSnow  

6. These baggers are the most unhappiest bunch ever


The many faces of baggers... 

 "What do you mean a black man is President?!?!" 
 " Damn, he won again" 
 "Yeah, shut it down" 
 "We are not racist" 
 " Damn, now people can get healthcare" 
"Yes, we own your vagina" 
 " facts, what are those?" 
 " let's vote against EVERYTHING Obama wants" 
 "I want my country back" 
 " Stop now, party loyalty is first" 
 "He's just not conservative enough" 

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023906987


On an OP by riqster  

Sarah Palin poses for pic, with her gun pointing at her own head.


http://bluntandcranky.wordpress.com/2013/10/28/why-you-shouldnt-listen-to-sarah-palin-reason-five-gazillion-and-two/ 

Jesus Christ on a nuclear pogo stick.

lpbk2713  

1. Fortunately for the Quitter no vital organs are involved.



DonViejo  

2. "I didn't know the gun was loaded!!"



Dash87  

9. The sad part is, someone shot a bear just so that she could pose with it.

lpbk2713  

22. ... and flash her dopey smile.


I swear, if she had a brain she'd take it out and play with it. 

NuclearDem  

27. Don't see a helicopter in the shot, therefore not her kill.


Also, fuck her for having an animal killed for a stupid fucking photo op.

BlueStreak  

36. This is performance art. She is depicting today's GOP


The mainstream republicans are represented by the bear. And she represents the teabaggers, and the gun represents the irony because the teabaggers are too stupid to avoid blowing their own brains out.

progressoid  

70. ...derp...




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023936283


On an OP by Judi Lynn  

New Mexico legislator expresses unease about yoga


Source: KOAT Albuquerque

New Mexico legislator expresses unease about yoga 
Published 8:29 AM MDT Oct 28, 2013 

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. —A New Mexico legislator has voiced concern that stretching during school physical education activities is really yoga and possibly could introduce children to Eastern religions. 

The Albuquerque Journal reports that Albuquerque elementary school teacher Ann Paulls-Neal recently spoke to a legislative study committee about student health and obesity. 

Paulls-Neal said she refers to her class exercises as stretching or mat work rather than yoga because she doesn't want to give the impression that religion is involved. 

Rep. Alonzo Baldonado expressed concern. 

The Los Lunas Republican said parents should be notified and given the option of alternative activities for their children because yoga is linked to Eastern religions.

Read more:
http://www.koat.com/news/new-mexico/albuquerque/new-mexico-legislator-expresses-unease-about-yoga/-/9153728/22667006/-/rooaf6z/-/index.html#ixzz2j2GPWwWJ 



okaawhatever  

36. Clearly this is gateway exercise. First you do a jumping jack or two, next thing you know


you're getting up early in the morning to run. Before all is said and done, you've got a gym membership and a statue of Buddha.

DetlefK  

6. OMG!!! Drinking wine and eating bread are gateway-activities to Christianity!!!


Incense sticks are a gateway to Shintoism! 
Owning lucky charms made from dead animals is a gateway to Voodoo! 
Meatless Mondays are a gateway to Islam and Hinduism! 
Smoking pot is a gateway to Rastafari! 
Getting shitfaced until you speak in tongues is a gateway to the norse religion! 
Setting up Christmas trees is a gateway to the pagan tree-worshipping in ancient europe! 
Starring into the flames of a campfire is a gateway to shamanism!

Paladin  

12. Rep. Baldonado, you don't have to practice yoga to fuck yourself.


Find a suitable position and get busy.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1014633335


On an OP by malaise

I hope DUers are watching Rachel right fugging now re McAfee


and ReTHUGs 

http://www.cnbc.com/id/101128689 

<snip> 

The House committee responsible for Obamacare oversight last week asked for expert guidance about the troubled launch of the federal Healthcare.gov site from John McAfee, the tech legend once suspected in the murder of his neighbor in Central America, CNBC has learned. 

That Republican-controlled committee wanted the McAfee Associates founder to "guide our oversight and review of" the implementation of the federal marketplace selling Obamacare insurance, according to an email obtained by CNBC.com. 

The committee suggested that McAfee might discuss the technologically botched rollout with members of Congress. 


KeepItReal  

4. Because when I think of top-notch software, I think "McAfee Anti-Virus"




(Yeah I know Mr. MacAfee is no longer associated with the software company)

Generic Other  

13. Did someone forget to uncheck the install McAfee button?


Next you will tell me they plan to keep all the records in fortran.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023904118


On an OP by Agschmid  

So just what is going on inside Hanger 3?




Something big and mysterious is rising from a floating barge at the end of Treasure Island, a former Navy base in the middle of San Francisco Bay. And Google's fingerprints are all over it. 



It's unclear what's inside the structure, which stands about four stories high and was made with a series of modern cargo containers. The same goes for when it will be unveiled, but the big tease has already begun. Locals refer to it as the secret project. 

Google did not respond to multiple requests for comment. But after going through lease agreements, tracking a contact tied to the project on LinkedIn, talking to locals on Treasure Island, and consulting with experts, it's all but certain that Google is the entity that is building the massive structure that's in plain sight, but behind tight security.

Could the structure be a sea-faring data center? One expert who was shown pictures of the structure thinks so, especially because being on a barge provides easy access to a source of cooling, as well as an inexpensive source of power -- the sea. And even more tellingly, Google was granted a patent in 2009 for a floating data center, and putting data centers inside shipping containers is already a well-established practice. 

Whether the structure is in fact a floating data center is hard to say for sure, of course, since Google's not talking. But Google, understandably, has a history of putting data centers in places with cheap cooling, as well as undertaking odd and unexpected projects like trying to bring Internet access to developing nations via balloons and blimps.

Full Article on CNet

oldhippie  

10. I know! I know! ......


These are going to be the actual data centers for the ACA website! The Administration finally contracted with a company that knows something about websites and data centers. They're just keeping it secret for now because of ...... (I can't think of a good reason, but I am sure someone here will have some ideas.  )

randome  

11. Because that's where the operators fill out the punch cards for the healthcare applications.


They're embarrassed to admit it. 

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023923630


On an OP by bvar22  

A Black Man WON the NASCAR Truck Race this afternoon at Martinsville Speedway, Virginia!!


Darrell Wallace Jr. Wins Truck Race 

Darrell Wallace Jr. became the first black driver in a half century to win on NASCAR's national level with a victory in a trucks race at Martinsville Speedway. 

http://espn.go.com/racing/nascar/truck/story/_/id/9883258/darrell-wallace-jr-becomes-first-black-driver-win-nascar-race-1963 



It was only a matter of time. 
The dam is fractured. 
Congrats to Darrel Wallace, Jr!!!! 

NOW, 
for a woman winner, 
(but it won't be Danica). 

TrollBuster9090  

32. They're already trying to 'Impeach' him on the grounds that:


1. He hasn't shown them a REAL birth certificate. 
2. He CHEATED with the help of Acorn. 
3. He only won because of gubmint interference. (The other guys had to use trucks with all those stupid pollution control devices.) 
4. They LET him win because of QUOTAS, and affirmative action and stuff... 
5. The 14th Amendment to the Constitooshin says a black man can't win NASCAR, or at least that's what Alex Jones says, and he's the biggest Constitooshinal Skollar I know!

Spitfire of ATJ  

39. You forgot the old "They felt it was TIME to have a black win".

TrollBuster9090  

53. And then held it up as PROOF that the Voting Rights Act is no longer needed.



Liberal_Stalwart71  

46. The Liberal Media has anointed him The Messiah!!

TrollBuster9090  

52. Why has he paid a million dollars to lawyers to have his driving school records sealed!?!?!?!



NightWatcher  

5. His truck goes faster because it's not flying a 4ft confederate flag from the antenna


It's a drag that slows the rest of 'em down.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023928682


On an OP by HarveyDarkey  

Meet Mr. Balls, Brazil’s Disturbing New Testicular Cancer Mascot




A Brazilian testicular cancer awareness group has created a mascot for the cause that is beyond disturbing. 

Say hello to Mr. Balls, or “Senhor Testiculo”, the wide-eyed, dual-toothed, rosy-cheeked, mole-sporting scrotum that will cause a lifetime of nightmares for anyone who lays eyes on him. 

The little curly hairs are an especially nice touch. 

http://digitaldeconstruction.com/meet-balls-disturbing-testicular-cancer-mascot/#.Umq0tPmmiwc

1000words  

1. That's nuts!


He'll hang around for a while but in the end will be sacked.

pinboy3niner  

3. Let's not get testy


It looks like he needs all the support he can get.

demwing  

17. Thats scrotally uncalled for


And this thread should be sacked ! 


Aerows  

50. I usually chime in on these tete a testes, but


I can't find a single little pun to display. Guess I'm all spayed out, tonight. It's so ovary sad.

Iggo  

10. "Your testicles and you."



pintobean  

116. That was my first thought



Chan790  

19. I thought that was a Congressman from Texas?



scheming daemons  

71. Señor Testiculo is a great username for my next account

pinboy3niner  

78. You're going to register a sack puppet?

Chan790  

94. He's Brazilian.


No ñ. They use Portuguese vocabulary, alphabet and spelling. 

It's "senhor" rather than "señor". 

(Also, you might want to avoid the name. It's my new DU euphemism for Blake Farenthold and I expect it might catch on.)

MADem  

106. So...Senhor Testiculo is .... BRAZIL NUTS!!!




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023921229


On an OP by LiberalElite  

Georgia man saves family from burning house, but turns back to save his beer


http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/georgia-man-saves-family-burning-house-turns-back-save-beer-article-1.1497313 

Walter Serpit said he helped five adults and two children escape the flames, but he turned back to grab his stash of brew. He managed to grab several cans of his Bud Light before he got out of the Columbus house unharmed. 



The Velveteen Ocelot  

2. Why on earth would someone risk his life for Bud Light?


The only possible use for that swill might be to help put out the fire.

malaise  

3. He almost made 'dying for a beer'


reality.

Cirque du So-What  

5. Bud Light?


That stuff is like making love in a canoe: fucking close to water.

LisaL  

11. I am surprised he didn't save the beer first.



pinboy3niner  

12. What was he THINKING?




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023928624


On an OP by brooklynite  

Colorado Shifting to All-Mail Election


Source: Governing

On Nov. 5, the way elections are conducted in Colorado will make a historic shift, but most voters shouldn't notice the change, said Amber McReynolds, Denver's director of elections. 

In the past, Coloradans had the option of voting by mail rather than standing in lines on Election Day. In this election, every voter in the state will get a ballot in the mail, with the option of voting in person. 

Also, voters can register through Election Day, rather than facing a deadline of 30 days before. 

Behind the scenes, Colorado will have a more efficient, more cost-effective and more consistent way of collecting ballots, McReynolds said. 

Read more:
http://www.governing.com/news/headlines/Colorado-Shifting-to-All-Mail-Election.html 

SaintLouisBlues  

2. Meanwhile, Texas changes to all-Male elections


http://www.democraticunderground.com/1014630175


On an OP by kpete  

Pennies From Heaven-Giving no-strings-attached $ to world's poorest produces remarkably good results


Giving no-strings-attached money to the world's poorest produces remarkably good results 

Cory Doctorow at 11:56 am Mon, Oct 28, 2013 

The Economist details outcomes from Give Directly, an organization that analyzes satellite photos to identify the poorest places in the world and then hands over no-strings-attached cash grants to the people who live there. It's a contrast to other programs, where donations are funneled into school construction or funding planned-out businesses. Give Directly has produced remarkably good results: "In randomly selected poor households in 63 villages that have received the windfalls, they say, the number of children going without food for a day has fallen by over a third and livestock holdings have risen by half. A year after the scheme began, incomes have gone up by a quarter and recipients seem less stressed, according to tests of their cortisol levels." 

For decades, it was thought that the poor needed almost everything done for them and that experts knew best what this was. Few people would trust anyone to spend $1,000 responsibly. 

Instead, governments, charities and development banks built schools and hospitals, roads and ports, irrigation pipes and electric cables. And they set up big bureaucracies to run it all. 

Still, this is not the only cash giveaway. A trial in Vietnam in 2006 gave one-off handouts to 550 households; two years later, local poverty rates had fallen by 20 percentage points. The scheme was dubbed “cash for coffins” after elderly recipients spent the money on their funeral arrangements to save their children the expense. 

A different scheme has been running in northern Uganda for four years. The government gives lump sums of around $10,000 to groups of 20 or so young people who club together to apply. Chris Blattman of Columbia University, New York, who has studied the programme, calls it “wildly successful”. Recipients spent a third of the money learning a trade (such as metalworking or tailoring) and much of the rest on tools and stock. They set up enterprises and work longer hours in their new trades. Average earnings rose by almost 50% in four years. 

This scheme has a condition: applicants must submit a business plan. But it highlights the virtues of no-strings grants (UCTs). They work when lack of money is the main problem. The people who do best are those with the least to start with (in Uganda, that especially means poor women).
In such conditions, the schemes provide better returns than job-training programmes that mainstream aid agencies favour. Remarkably, they even do better than secondary education, which pushes up wages in poor countries by 10-15% for each extra year of schooling. This may be because recipients know what they need better than donors do—a core advantage of no-strings schemes. They also outscore conditional transfers, because some families eligible for these fail to meet the conditions through no fault of their own (if they live too far from a school, for instance).

MORE: 
http://www.economist.com/news/international/21588385-giving-money-directly-poor-people-works-surprisingly-well-it-cannot-deal 

Egalitarian Thug  

2. Every good conservative knows that this doesn't work. People are inherently dishonest


and won't work unless they are forced. 

eggplant  

3. Well, that's certainly been true of the House Republicans. n/t


http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023938900

Posted by Flying Squirrel | Wed Oct 30, 2013, 05:33 AM (12 replies)

DU Topic Study: Preliminary Thread

In this post I talked about my desire to graph the changing conversation on DU.

At the time, I had planned on starting the study now, which would mean that it would take a long time for patterns to emerge. My feeling was that it would be too difficult to graph the conversation up till now, as I would need to know which keywords to look for.

Then I realized that it might in fact be possible - if I could somehow get a representative sample of DU posts. How could I do that? By carefully choosing a small enough group of DU'ers that I could do a search on, who nevertheless posted what could be considered to be a representative sample of DU as a whole.

The criteria I used was as follows:

(a) Minimum of 8 years posting on DU;
(b) Statistically significant number of threads started;
(c) Consistent posting (few, if any, breaks);
(d) Statistically significant number of average recs per post;
(e) Combined total of posts, recs, and views >= 20% of DU as a whole;
(f) Keywords in posts, on aggregate, tend to mirror keywords in DU as a whole over same time period.

My goal was to have the smallest number of DU'ers as possible which would fit this criteria (to make it easier on me when doing searches.)

PLEASE NOTE that it was not my intention to cause any controversy here; that in choosing specific DU'ers it is not my intention to express or imply any opinion regarding said DU'ers, positive or negative; my sole purpose was to choose what I felt to be the best possible representative of DU as a whole, with the fewest possible actual posters, in order to graph the changing conversation at DU over time.

The end results I am hoping for are as follows:

(a) See which topics have staying power, or "legs";
(b) Notice which important topics seem to be ignored or not discussed much;
(c) Observe the average length of time for any news trend;
(d) Possibly note differences in DU conversation vs Mass Media conversation;
(e) Any unexpected observations which may show up.

Now for the part you've been waiting for, which I decided to post separately here in order to get the inevitable discussion out of the way before posting the study results (the study is not yet completed).

These are the ten DU'ers I chose to use:

applegrove, babylonsister, cali, kpete, marmar, n2doc, ProSense, purveyor, WillyT, and xchrom.

This study will be confined to the following forums:

Latest Breaking News, Good Reads, Video & Multimedia, Politics 2013, General Discussion, Environment & Energy.

Since I do not plan to use these DUers in future studies going forward, I felt it was ok to list them here to satisfy the inevitable curiosity regarding how I came up with my results.

These ten DU'ers combined account for more than 20% of DU Posts, Views and Recs - a statistically significant sample.
Posted by Flying Squirrel | Tue Oct 29, 2013, 09:42 PM (15 replies)

More on words: Graphing the discussion on DU

Something I've been thinking about for some time... Awhile back I posted a graph showing the change in conversation at DU from the NSA to Syria. More recently I created a few DU word clouds. This kind of thing is, for some reason, fascinating to me - so I thought maybe I'd start tracking some topics and posting graphs about the rise and fall of those topics on DU.

To simplify it down to topics, I'm going to remove common words such as "GOP", "Republican(s)", and all politicians ("Boehner", "Cruz", "Grayson", "Obama", "Reid", etc.)

Most likely this will be updated weekly. For the first graph, in order to avoid a crazy graphic that was too difficult to read I put in the total number of threads over a week-long period into each day of the week. (I put the crazy graph below it to show the problem with keeping track of words on a daily basis.)





I'm not sure I'll be leaving "War" in there as it often is used in different ways not really referring to war, which means I have to go through and look at each thread to determine if it's really war that's being discussed. Some words may drop off and other words may be added. Your suggestions are most welcome.

Posted by Flying Squirrel | Sat Oct 26, 2013, 11:20 PM (18 replies)

I friggin' LOVE my state (WA) - my 18 yo daughter is registered to vote and didn't even know it

She texted me, asking why she had just gotten a voting pamphlet in the mail.

I said, "Probably because you just got a Washington State ID card."

Who knows how long she might have put it off... now she'll get a ballot in the mail. Knowing her, she'll probably sit down with the voting pamphlet, carefully go over everything, fill out the ballot and send it in.

Contrast this with other states that are doing their level best to discourage turnout, make it difficult to vote, or out-and-out disenfranchise likely Democratic voters.

Posted by Flying Squirrel | Sat Oct 26, 2013, 10:13 PM (18 replies)

Anybody ever do a DU word cloud?

This is General Discussion for the past 5 days:



Latest Breaking News, same time period:



The Lounge, same time period (as requested):



Posted by Flying Squirrel | Thu Oct 24, 2013, 12:56 AM (70 replies)

*** Wacky Wednesday DUzy Awards: In which Skinner snags a DUzy ***



OMG not again… ppl are gonna start getting used to this, then what?

Special thanks to everyone who contributed to this edition, either by responding to a post with "DUzy" in the subject line or by sending me a PM. The DUzy awards couldn't happen without you!

Can't wait for your DUzy fix? Try the DIY DUzy Thread, hosted by hootinholler! This week's thread:


http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023889720



On an OP by B Calm

What happen to the Lounge?


Don't see it anymore??

JHB  

1. The LOLcats are hiding it


Playing another trick on the stoopid humins.

Warren DeMontague  

3. It's the BEST LOUNGE THREAD EVAH


the thread that annihilates the entire place. 

They haven't figured out how to bring it back, though.

xchrom  

4. They drove the bus into the lagoon. Nt

CJCRANE  

5. What happened in the Lounge


stays in the Lounge. 


Phentex  

21. Thanks, Obama!


You know it's bad when the lounge is furloughed.

Fumesucker  

8. It was folded into the Lurker's Group n/t

Earth_First  

10. I haz control now!



JustABozoOnThisBus  

13. Go complain in Meta ...


... or are you going to claim you can't see that, either? 

:kidding:

deutsey  

15. The Lounge has finally seceded from DU n/t

Phentex  

17. Rugs are being cleaned, smoke cleared out, disco bulbs replaced...


Those things don't happen on their own.

pinboy3niner  

23. When the Lounge has YOU on Ignore, you know you're having a bad day

Earth_First  

26. BREAKING: Randsom note provided to AP by anon_Kitteh:



HappyMe  

31. Damn.


That had to be one hell of a party that I missed. 



I'm sure that extensive renovations/cleaning are needed.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023876921


On an OP by In_The_Wind  

Who stole The Lounge?



hobbit709  

2. Gremlins


Probably from the Kremlin.

trumad  

3. Lounge has decided to shutdown until---


The Donuts and Coffee are free.

jakeXT  

8. Just plug the correct cable back in.



JHB  

9. The Squirrel-Chaser Party forced a shutdown...


...until all handouts to kittehs are ended.

In_The_Wind  

13. Sure! Just hang 'em out to dry ...




Cruel heartless ketteh haters!

FSogol  

12. DU's long national nightmare is over!




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023876965


On an OP by Callmecrazy  

Dang it.


Just got back from the Dolphins game. 
Dolphins 21, Bills 23.

We lost, but I still had a great time. 

How did your teams do today?

petronius  

1. Apparently my team won, 23-21




http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018501824


On an OP by dorkzilla  

A note about words I personally hate so stop using them, alright??


Okay, for starters, it's EAVESdropping, not EASEdropping. 

it's FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES not FOR ALL INTENSIVE PURPOSES. 

HOUSEHOLD name, not HOUSE WHOLE name. 

You cannot have a HANDFUL of SENATORS. 

I could go on and on...... 

AND ITS CALIFORNIA, AL-GOD-DAMNED RIGHT????? 

Edit--for the record, I KNOW I left out the apostrophe in the "its" above. Please see #69 below for the 'splainin'. 

New edit: FFS…

This was an attempted parody of the plethora of call-out threads that have infected DU of late.

(A DUzy of a thread, in case you missed it)

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023887465


On an OP by skip fox  

Is there an echo in here? Please come CAPTION a gaggle of Cruzs!!!




treestar  

2. If we could ALL get elected, we'd have enough seats

to obstruct ourselves.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023877759


On an OP by ProSense  

John Boehner: 'I Got Overrun' By My Caucus


John Boehner: 'I Got Overrun' By My Caucus 

In explaining the origins of the first government shutdown since 1996, House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) reportedly admitted to President Barack Obama earlier this month that he was "overrun" by his Republican caucus. 

“John, what happened?” Obama asked Boehner on the second day of the shutdown, according to Politico. 

“I got overrun, that’s what happened,” Boehner replied as he reportedly tried to exit a White House meeting for a smoke break. 

Democrats repeatedly questioned Bohener's clout over Republican House members throughout the budget and debt standoff, arguing that the speaker capitulates too often to conservatives on Capitol Hill. 

Sen. Chuck Schumer (D-NY) said Boehner has become a "puppet — with Ted Cruz pulling the strings," while Obama said the speaker's inability to "control his caucus" contributed to the impasse. 

http://talkingpointsmemo.com/livewire/john-boehner-i-got-overrun-by-my-caucus

Indianademocrat91  

2. A Song for the Occassion


John Boehner got run over by his caucus 
Walking home from the White House Shutdown eve. 
You can say there's no such thing as too much bronzer, 
But as for me and Barack, we believe. 

He'd been drinking too much at his tea party, 
And we'd begged him not to flea. 
But he forgot his name in negotiations, 
And he staggered out the door into his limousine. 

When they found him Shutdown morning, 
At the scene of the attack. 
He had tea bags on his forehead, 
And incriminating Cruz marks on his back. 

Boehner got run over by his caucus, 
Walking home from the White House Shutdown eve. 
You can say there's no such thing as too much bronzer, 
But as for me and Barack, we believe. 

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023878405


On an OP by packman  

I would like to know the Administrators reasoning as to why-


they downvoted my post and did not allow it showing kittens nuzzling in women's breast , 

A Jury voted 5-1 to hide this post on Fri Sep 27, 2013, 05:05 PM. Reason: This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate. When the original post in a discussion thread is hidden by Jury decision, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted. 

YET DU allows an offensive , in my opinion, photoshopped picture of Ted Cruz's head shown as a penis complete in every anatomical detail. 

The picture is offensive and should be removed.

Skinner  

1. The administrators don't hide posts. They are hidden by a jury of your peers.


When your post was hidden, you should have received a DU Mail message explaining why it was hidden. 

The alerter said this: This is a sexist video of shot after shot of boobies. Even in the lounge, sexism is not allowed on DU. 

Juror #4 said this: NSFW so I didn't watch it, but nonetheless it sounds inappropriate for DU. Recommend posting it on 4chan instead. 

Juror #5 said this: Alerted is right. Lounge is for humor--not blatant sexist objectification of women. 

As for the picture of Ted Cruz's head shaped like a penis, I suspect that was allowed to stay because Ted Cruz is a dick. 



http://www.democraticunderground.com/12593745


On an OP by RandySF  

House Stenographer is not insane, just batshit crazy.


This is what happened ….. Click to read 

From FNC CHAD PERGRAM: 

– 

Urgent: House Stenographer says Holy Spirit woke her up at night to deliver message to the House 

Per Kaplan/Pergram-Capitol Hill 

Karrah Kaplan spoke with the husband of House stenographer Dianne Reidy last night. There’s an emailed statement here from Dan Reidy. 

First, from Dianne: 

“For the past 2 and 1/2 weeks, the Holy Spirit has been waking me up in the 
middle of the night and preparing me (through my reluctance and doubt) to deliver 
a message in the House Chamber. 
That is what I did last night” 

Her husand Dan says “My wife is a sweet, level-headed wonderful woman of God. I am proud of her.” 

Chad Pergram 
FOX News 
Senior Producer for Capitol Hill 

http://gretawire.foxnewsinsider.com/2013/10/17/this-is-what-happened-click-to-read/

TeamPooka  

6. just left this post to see the reaction from commenters....


"She thought God was speaking to her but it turns out she was sleeping with the AM radio on." 

Scootaloo  

7. Probably not the first religion whose foundation involves payday loan ads.


http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023875727


On an OP by brooklynite  

House Stenographer Explains Her Freemason-Themed Outburst


Source: Slate

Dianne Reidy, the stenographer who provided a fittingly bizarre coda to the shutdown with her rant about how the Freemasons wrote the Constitution, offered up an explanation yesterday for why she decided to begin yelling on the House floor in the first place: God told her to. 

"For the past 2 and 1/2 weeks, the Holy Spirit has been waking me up in the middle of the night and preparing me (through my reluctance and doubt) to deliver a message in the House Chamber," she told Fox News' Chad Pergram in an email yesterday. "That is what I did last night.” 

Reidy's husband, Dan, told a similar story to the New York Post. "Two weeks, waking up in the middle of the night," he told the paper. "She’s like, I can’t sleep, God’s got me in the work." 

After being dragged from the House floor mid-rant, Dianne Reidy was taken to George Washington Hospital, where she was interviewed by a psychiatrist before being released. "The doctor was asking what was the message, what was the intent of the message?” her husband said. "She goes: 'I don’t know I just spoke what I felt God was putting in my heart. I don’t know who it was directed at'."

Read more:
www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2013/10/18/house_stenographer_explains_her_freemason_themed_outburst.html

Well, thanks for clearing that up...

antiquie  

14. Common mental illness and obsession with nutty beliefs


It would be grand if we could keep all like this off the House floor.


Plucketeer  

29. Yeah butt....


then how would they be able to achieve a quorum?

BainsBane  

5. The sad thing is, this is the least crazy thing to happen in the House lately.

brer cat  

8. God wakes me up in the middle of the night, too.


He tells me to go to the bathroom and pee. Thank goodness he never told me to do that in the House chamber.

antiquie  

15. Is this a (chamber) pot joke?


Nevermind I thought I was in The Lounge.

chervilant  

18. The Lounge is closed for repair, apparently...


We're lucky to have a potty chair... somewhere... 

Orrex  

62. I'm just relieved that there's a sensible explanation


http://www.democraticunderground.com/1014624910


On an OP by Coyotl  

GOOD CATCH MR. PRESIDENT! Obama Catches Fainting Woman During White House Speech! (Video)


http://aattp.org/good-catch-mr-president-obama-catches-fainting-woman-white-house-speech-video 

During a speech this morning by President Obama on Obamacare, a woman standing directly behind the president began to wobble back and forth as if she was about to faint. 

Luckily, Obama realized there was something going on behind him and immediately turned around to catch the woman, making sure she remained steady on her feet. 

.... “This is what happens when I talk too long,” the president said ....

GOOD CATCH MR. PRESIDENT! 



mockmonkey  

45. pResident Bush helping someone out who is feeling tipsy




Oh wait, Houston we have a problem.

http://sync.democraticunderground.com/10023895148

Posted by Flying Squirrel | Wed Oct 23, 2013, 01:11 AM (30 replies)

** It's another RANDOM ATTACK of the DUzy awards! ** (Updated)




No, this is not a celebration.

Well, ok, maybe just a little.

Special thanks to everyone who contributed to this edition, either by responding to a post with "DUzy" in the subject line or by sending me a PM. The DUzy awards couldn't happen without you!



PLEASE NOTE: I am no longer using the account "The DUzy Awards" - The account has been passed on to hootinholler for the time being. I didn't want to have to check two different mailboxes and I sometimes forgot which account I was using, which led to people asking why "The DUzy Awards" was reccing a thread. The DUzy Awards is not an official position here on DU, and personally I like it that way.



So, if you want to PM a link, I would recommend sending it to both me and to "The DUzy Awards", just to make sure.


On an OP by babylonsister  

"... We're down to blood relatives and paid staffers."





Motown_Johnny

1. and the paid staffers are lying to the pollsters.

hatrack  

9. And who made it so? Why, YOU, Senator, when you picked the Quitting Quitter of Quit.


Nice work!


ficuswoman   

10. John McCain should go home.


And weave baskets.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023850138



On an OP by displacedtexan   

Anyone else as freaked out as I am that Luke Russert sounds smart today?

I have ridiculed that little spud since Daddy passed & Baby got a cushy TV gig because of his last name. But today, he's sounded rational, informed, and totally tuned in. 

Am I crazy (due to republican-insanity overload)?

Hassin Bin Sober  

1. Even a blind chicken can pick up a seed or two.

rug  

8. The more people agree with me, the smarter I consider them.


displacedtexan  

9. But that's just because you're brilliant!

grantcart  

12. I agree with you 100%.

 rug  

10. I always considered you one of the brightest lights on DU.


http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023857056



On an OP by CatWoman  

John Boehner Reportedly Tells Harry Reid He Will Move Quickly


The office of Speaker Boehner told the office of Majority Leader Harry Reid's on Tuesday night that they would be willing to send them a "message" so that the procedural process of getting a debt limit and government funding bill could move faster. 

The communication between the two was first reported by Salon's Brian Beutler and was confirmed by an aide to the Huffington Post. The aide said that the news was delivered after House Republican leadership failed to move their own bill to resolve the dual matters. 

A message is a legislative vehicle that if sent from Boehner to the Senate would allow Reid to skip one cloture vote. This would ensure that if one Senator wanted to gum up the works, he or she could only force 30 hours of consideration. 

A request for comment to Boehner's office was not immediately returned, though if the news is true, it is a signal that the Speaker knows the time for staring down the Senate is up. 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/15/john-boehner-harry-reid_n_4103938.html

onehandle  

2. ...To The Spray Tan Booth. nt

Springslips  

7. These rules


That govern our Houses of legislation are strange and ridiculous. They seem randomly complex for no apparent reason. As if I am watching some Dungeon and Dragon game played by 180-IQ slackers in their mother basement. I am sooo glade 'Boner' is floating the Message Card to Reed giving him one Cloture Vote for free...unless Cruz flips the Toad The Wet Sprocket card which in combo with Jim Jordan's Lucy Luo Magic Wand invalidates the message card and thus.... 

I swear this can't be a mature, reasonable world.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023858664



On an OP by malaise  

Bwaaaaaaaaah! ReTHUGs, Amazing Grace and how Gerry Connolly nailed it


http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/15/house-republicans-amazing-grace_n_4101319.html 

<snip> 

When reports surfaced that House Republicans sang "Amazing Grace" during a Tuesday morning meeting, Rep. Gerry Connolly (D-Va.) responded with a laugh. 

"Isn't that usually sung at funerals?" he joked with reporters. 

"I hope they understand the derivations of those lyrics," Connolly said. "It was written by a slave trader who came to be filled with remorse for his actions. His words say, 'I was blind but now I see' ... He is remorseful for his past and takes responsibility for those actions and sees the saving light of grace, even for a wretch like himself." 

"I'm not saying my colleagues are wretches," he added. "But I hope what that indicates, the symbolism of singing that beautiful hymn that all Americans share, is that there's some saving grace here." 

Asked what he thinks Democrats will sing in their next caucus meeting, Connolly thought for a second. Then he sounded a note of optimism, given the recent progress toward a bipartisan Senate fiscal deal. 

"Here Comes The Sun," he said. 
------------------------ 



Too good

Tanuki  

4. The Repugs should have sung "Nearer my God to Thee", famously played


by the orchestra on the sinking Titanic.

calimary  

15. "I'm not saying my colleagues are wretches." Well, then, I will, Congressman Connolly!


I'll be glad to. They're wretches! They're WORST than wretches! They're seditious, spoiled, selfish, short-sighted, proudly and willfully ignorant, mean-spirited, even downright treasonous, and they have NO BUSINESS anywhere near government!!!!

malaise  

20. That's an insult to wretches




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023860060



On an OP by Orrex  

In all the shutdown confusion, I've totally lost track of Benghazi


And what about IRS-gate? 

How long until we can we get back to the issues that really matter?

pinboy3niner  

13. At last report, it was still in Libya


Where did you think it had gotten to? 


FSogol  

5. Benghazi!



TheCowsCameHome  

7. What about the hours spent hunting for the birth certificate?


Doesn't that mean anything? Or is that all for naught? 


kentauros  

8. Don't you know?


The birth certificate was kept "safe" at the diplomatic building in Benghazi. 


randome  

11. In the Ark of the Covenant, which is in the basement.


Guarded by Bin Laden. 

Tommy_Carcetti  

18. Dr. Sheldon Cooper is on the ball.


















http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023860497



On an OP by n2doc  

Toon: Rebranded GOP




Xipe Totec  

2. If they really want to save face, they need to put the grenade between their legs and pull the pin.


Can't say what will happen to their nether parts, but the face should survive intact. 

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023857329



On an OP by bluesbassman  

Dershowitz throws the Constitution, figuratively, at Ted Cruz


Source: Yahoo News

But when it came to the shutdown and debt-ceiling fight, Dershowitz made his case. 

“I think it raises very serious constitutional questions of the kind that Ted Cruz should be interested in. Could you imagine Hamilton and Madison sitting around and drafting the Constitution and the Federalist Papers. They’re talking about how the government has to pay its debts, how it has to secure the credit of the United States, how the House of Representatives to originate bills on revenue. Nobody in a million years would have contemplated the power of Congress to shut down the government, to create doubts about our creditworthiness,” he said. 

“I think you can make a very strong argument that what Ted Cruz is doing is deeply unconstitutional. Whether a court would accept that or say it’s a political question is another issue, but Cruz is a principled man. He ought to look at the Constitution and look into his heart and ask himself, ‘What would Alexander Hamilton have done,’” Dershowitz said.

Read more: http://news.yahoo.com/dershowitz-throws-constitution-figuratively-ted-cruz-141406725--politics.html 


More to hang around Cruz's neck during the next election.

DinahMoeHum  

3. Unfortunately, Cruz is not up for re-election until 2018.



lastlib  

16. I'll be waiting.......








okaawhatever  

19. We now have an explanation as to Cruz & Mike Lee's whereabouts during the lunch absence. Cruz having


been challenged to "look into his heart" by Dershowitz, was confused as to the instructions. He called on his friend Mike Lee to explain what the "heart thing" was. Lee, familiar with the term but uncertain of it's exact location, was unable to expedite the process. After two hours of searching they concluded it was a joke being pulled on Sen Cruz by Professor Dershowitz akin to a snipe hunt. Cruz was overheard saying to Lee, "that Dershowitz, he's getting up in years. He also used to tell me I looked like McCarthy. Silly man, It's McCartney and I don't look anything like a Beatle".

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1014622525



On an OP by bluedeathray  

McConnell - Tough shit...


A provision in the Federal funding bill includes $2.918 billion in funding for a dam in Kentucky. He's walking away from this debacle with lots of your tax dollars for a project that's over budget, and won't be completed until 2024. 

http://news.yahoo.com/congressional-deal-includes-nearly--3-billion-for-kentucky-dam-project-001012679.html 

Orsino  

9. Because only the Dems give a dam about governing.




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023869267



On an OP by spanone  

local gannett newspaper running this picture on front of webpage - wtf?




elehhhhna  

1. punching himself in the face or the nuts?


it's a poll.

eShirl  

5. both, alternately

Brigid  

8. Nancy took the gavel away from him.



bluesbassman  

2. He was doing Rock-Paper-Scissors with the Prez. He lost.




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023867444
Posted by Flying Squirrel | Fri Oct 18, 2013, 05:47 AM (15 replies)

* A mini DUzy thread for your Tuesday morning... *



Ok, so… I have free time on my hands due to a mini break-up with my girlfriend (she does not approve of me wasting my time on DU, and I do not approve of her disapproval of me!)

Having nothing better to do with my time tonight, I thought I'd fill it with a mini DUzy thread (hootinholler has bravely attempted a DU-it-yourself DUzy concept, but it remains to be seen whether that will work out in the long run.)

In the mean time, with no apologies for the past and no promises for the future, here's a DUzy thread for y'all!


Special thanks to everyone who contributed to this edition, either by responding to a post with "DUzy" in the subject line or by sending me a PM. The DUzy's could not ever happen without you!



On an OP by Drunken Irishman  

Bette Midler is pissed the fuck off...


https://twitter.com/BetteMidler 

@BetteMidler 
The real wages of workers on factory floors are lower than in the early ’70s. Richest 10% of Americans get over half the income US produces. 

‏@BetteMidler 
So....@tedcruz? Blame Canada! 

@BetteMidler 
.@tedcruz pushes this country to the brink. "A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its pants." 

‏@BetteMidler 
Looks like it might be the end of @tedcruz. Dumb is dumb, and it's becoming clearer every minute... 

@BetteMidler 
What's the term for a Congress that votes against gun control, and shuts down the gov't over affordable healthcare? Oh yeah...fucked up. 

@BetteMidler 
The New Normal: USA held hostage by right wing extremists. Osama Ben Laden couldn't have done it better.

Spitfire of ATJ  

13. Check out how the Right twists things....


http://newsbusters.org/blogs/noel-sheppard/2013/07/31/bette-midler-america-it-s-easier-take-life-get-health-insurance 

Let's look at the facts, shall we? 

In 2011, there were about 14,000 homicides in our nation. That year, 48.6 million Americans were uninsured. 

That means about 261 million people in our country had health insurance that year, or 18,643 times the number of homicides. 

Midler might be a Divine singer, but her intellectual capacity is anything but.


Oh sure, let's take the number of people WITH insurance and compare that to the number of people killed by guns and then say the numbers are wildly different and then have the nerve to claim intellectual superiority. 

It's like watching Bush give a mangled press conference and exit the stage thinking, "nailed it!"

cui bono  

14. LOL. What does that even mean???


Huh??? That made my brain crash. 

Spitfire of ATJ  

18. It's like asking "If a hen and a half can lay an egg and a half in a day and a half then,..."


....how long will it take a rooster sitting on a brass doorknob to hatch a hardware store?

cui bono  

22. Did you know that...


that is an actual math question on the official Tea Party candidate qualifying exam? 

The correct answer is "Obama is a socialist". 

Spitfire of ATJ  

24. I thought it was "Obama is a Kenyan Communist Muslim Terrorist Fascist Dictator".

Mnemosyne  

41. He's a Muslin, dammit, get the spelling right! nt

Heather MC  

35. Ted Cruz is somewhere right now gleefully jumping up and down, pissing his pants, & singing


Bette Medler Knows my name!!!!!!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023798384



On an OP by xfundy  

Betty Crocker is a pro-homo, anti-christian socialist homofascist communist librul traitor 2 Murkkka


Can't wait to see how this plays among the "Let us Prey" crowd.

(Mass pun-demonium ensued, DUzy awards to all who parsnip-itated!)

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023833748



OP by Gidney N Cloyd  

OMG, it's Frank Burns and Hotlips Houlihan 2.0






amb123  

6. "Unless we each conform, unless we obey orders . . .


unless we follow our leaders blindly, there's no possible way we can remain free!" 

- Frank Burns, MASH Episode: 'The Novocaine Mutiny' 

rustydog  

33. Isn't it odd both of them are having difficulty


feeling a heartbeat?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023845340



On an OP by WilliamPitt  

"DEFEND ARE VETERAN'S"




From the DC Tea Party riot yesterday. Yes, this is real. 

The apostrophe-s is what makes it art. 

What we're up against, folks.

(Original credit, and therefore a Duzy award, for this image goes to hexola)

pinboy3niner  

6. As hootinholler observed in another thread...


...they spelled "DEFUND" wrong.

(DUzy to everyone else who said the same thing throughout the thread)

KurtNYC  

8. this is what happens when you "Defund are skool's"

maryellen99  

13. Too bad Obamacare doesn't cover spelling lessons nt

L0oniX  

18. All your tea are belong us.

bullwinkle428  

21. "I CAN TYPING" hits the road!!



Oilwellian  

25. Geez Louise


They don't even have a basic grasp of three-letter words. Here's another one where they confuse "our" with "are"... 


Ghost in the Machine  

63. He was part of my "FReeper Sign" I made years ago....



louslobbs  

80. Apparently their "Windows" system doesn't have spell check. n/t


http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023846601



On an OP by elleng  

*News Conference w Boner now,


MSNBC, fwiw

Liberal Veteran  

16. Transcript


Oompa Loompa doom-pa-dee-do 
I have another puzzle for you 
Oompa Loompa doom-pa-da-dee 
If you are wise, you'll listen to me 
Who do you blame when your party's a brat? 
Pampered and spoiled like a Siamese cat 
Blaming the voters is a lie and a shame 
You know exactly who's to blame: 
The President of the Country. 

AllenVanAllen  

40. How apropos...




http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023821090



OP by ashling  

Breaking: Astrophysical Shutdown threat



LiberalEsto  

1. Tell Pluto to


blow it out Uranus 



http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018494749



Happy Tuesday, everyone!


Posted by Flying Squirrel | Tue Oct 15, 2013, 06:26 AM (25 replies)

* A mini DUzy thread for your Tuesday morning... *

http://www.democraticunderground.com/10023851995
Posted by Flying Squirrel | Tue Oct 15, 2013, 06:05 AM (2 replies)
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