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Revocation of Independence
29 November 2011 – 10:30
Posted in Humor, Law and Politics
In a fit of anger her majesty Queen Elizabeth II issued the following letter to the citizens of United States of America
To the citizens of the United States of America from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II
In light of your failure to financially manage yourselves and inability to effectively govern yourselves responsibly, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up ‘revocation’ in the Oxford English Dictionary.)
Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Kansas, which she does not fancy).
Your new Prime Minister, David William Donald Cameron, will appoint a Governor for the former United States of America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated sometime next year to determine whether any of you noticed.
To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
MORE ON HER MAJESTY'S DECREE: http://itzhakts.wordpress.com/2011/11/29/revocation-of-independence/
Posted by FourScore | Sat Oct 5, 2013, 04:31 PM (3 replies)
Posted by FourScore | Fri Oct 4, 2013, 12:23 PM (20 replies)
Tue Oct 01, 2013 at 06:44 PM PDT
I saw this comment in the San Francisco Chronicle this morning and loved it. I went to work, came home and loved it more. Some great points are made here and I wish I could take some credit. The least I can do is share it. This was stolen from "boozer, (posted at) 8:57 AM on October 1, 2013":
Things you gotta believe to be a Republican today
* Sending racy Tweets and pictures of yourself to a woman you aren't married to is a much more serious crime than being a "pro-life" congressman who makes your wife and your mistress get abortions.
* Michelle Bachmann, Louie Gohmert, Alan West, Todd Akin, Joe Walsh, Ted Cruz, and Steve Stockman are intelligent, rational human beings.
* You decry your party's reputation as "the stupid party" while approving legislation to have creationism taught in science class.
* Willard Mitt Rmoney lost the election because he wasn't conservative enough.
* The fact that business leaders can throw hundreds of millions of dollars at Karl Rove and other SuperPACs to try and buy the election doesn't mean they can also afford to pay their employees living wages with good benefits.
* Obamacare is the reason your hours are being cut and your pay is not going up; the CEO's $15 million bonus has nothing to do with it.
* Gun ownership is a right. Heath care is a privilege. If a kids die because of treatable cancer or a nutcase gunning them down, oh well.
* You support drug testing of welfare recipients, but oppose criminal background checks and mental health screening of gun buyers.
* The First Amendment shouldn't apply to TV, radio, video games, or the Internet because those things didn't exist in 1787. The Second Amendment applies to automatic rifles and anti-personnel ammunition even though those things didn't exist in 1787.
* You scream for federal disaster aid when your state catches fire or drowns in a hurricane, but when it happens somewhere else in the country you vote against federal disaster aid.
* A guy who once shot his friend in the face, possibly while being roaring drunk at the time, has the moral authority to speak out in opposition to gun control.
* Germany gets more sunlight than California.
* $250,000 a year is "poor", but the federal minimum wage is too high.
* Actually allowing black people to vote is "racial entitlement"
* You're a Birther who likes the idea of Ted Cruz running for President.
He'll remain anonymous, I guess (unless he's a DKos member). But I appreciate his logic, wit or simply his ability to collect poignant quotes.
Posted by FourScore | Wed Oct 2, 2013, 11:42 AM (1 replies)
...so as not to lose all hope.
Posted by FourScore | Wed Oct 2, 2013, 08:44 AM (4 replies)
Mon Sep 30, 2013 at 10:13 PM PDT
A Republican Hostage Speaks. Your Grand Old Party is Over.
I'm not sorry for crashing the party that Ted Cruz and the GOP is having over their success in shutting down that great big evil government. You know, that Big Ebil Gubmint your money masters spend millions getting you elected to, so put down that glass of expensive wine some lobbyist paid for and have a listen.
The Party Is Over.
No, not the party you're having now; the party you guys are having will continue along with the self-congratulatory back slapping, roars of approval from zealots, and campaign checks from your owners. It's the Party that you belong to. The Dinosaur Party. It's over, done, finished, kaput.
It was doneski when you let crazy people control it to the point that you kept on doing ever more extremist things like voting to continue giving taxpayer money to millionaire farm corporations while prying bread out of the mouth of hungry children. It was over when you invited an entire panel of men to discuss womens health care needs while blocking one woman, Sandra Fluke, to speak. And then, as you so often do, you continued to take it way over the cliff too far by allowing Rust Lintball to go on a 3 day rant hammering on her, lying about her, and making some of the most outrageous claims and demands we've ever heard. And then you made sure to ignore the American people who, with 90% approval, want expanded background checks for firearms purchases. Those are just 3 of the crazy things you've done. I've got a really long list.
You started believing your own pile of baloney. You swallowed the hooey that Faux Newzzz told you about the 2012 polls being skewed. You truly believed that Romney/Ryan were about to be elected with huge Republican majorities. Even Karl Rove, who lies like a rug for the unwashed masses, believed his own crapola when reality suddenly penetrated on election night November, 2012.
And you still believe that Americans really love the crap you've been shoveling out to them with your ceaseless extremism, heartless gutting of programs to help the vulnerable, along with endless hatred of anyone besides heterosexual, White, Christian males.
You don't have a bubble anymore; you've got a super duper nuclear shelter where nothing penetrates.
Let me bring a dose of reality inside your bubble: outside of your incredible gerrymandering of House districts and voter suppression efforts, you guys LOST the election in 2012. Big time.
Who won? Obama Care, the 99%, workers, women, science and other things you guys just love to hate won.
You haven't gotten the message. You. Lost.
Mitt Romneys agenda lost. Paul Ryans budget lost. The Republican platform lost. The shenanigans you were up to for the past few years lost.
For a time, you seemed in shock, promised to change, and said you learned your lesson. But then it was back to the same old extremism as before, except that you put it on steroids. It's more zealous than before, more heartless, more harmful to our most vulnerable citizens.
You didn't pay attention when polls showed you that the Congress you control with your party is less popular than venereal disease and cockroaches. You guys thought you were awesome!
And now, in your desperation, you're taking the entire country hostage with a litany of demands that, in their effect, make Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan the de facto president and Veep because it's their platform objectives that would be achieved.
Democracy should never work that way no matter how much you huff and puff and blow our houses down. No matter how much propaganda, talking points, political memes, paid shills or outright lies you put out there, you can't hide from your responsibility for what is happening.
Remember the shutdown of the 1990s? I do. And that was a time that there was an actual budget in place rather than just a series of continuing resolutions along with an economy destroying sequester. That time is going to be a remembered as a picnic compared to now.
You guys found out the hard way in the next election that the people thought you were clowns unworthy of re-election. Even your severely gerrymandered districts that your pals worked so hard to put into place may not save you this time around.
26% of this country might think you're heroes, but you can't win elections with 26% no matter how much payola the Koch Brothers and RW money men throw into your campaign war chests. And those made up, astroturf groups funded by your donors? Yeah, they're good for attack ads, but folks are waking up and realizing that they've been invented to tell lies under the guise of a group of real citizens.
So, go ahead and shut it down. Take my Social Security check, close government offices, furlough thousands of government employees, stop everything dead in its tracks. I have a message for you.
We Don't Negotiate With Hostage Takers
Now, I know that this comes as a surprise to you. In the past, President Obama has given you a whole lot of what you've wanted in exchange for your promise to please not destroy the country. Those days are over since you've gone whole hog in your extortion demands.
So enjoy your party, drink your champagne, celebrate your success in shutting down the government. Your hangover begins tomorrow and there's not enough aspirin to relieve your symptoms.
Posted by FourScore | Tue Oct 1, 2013, 06:47 PM (1 replies)
Posted by FourScore | Tue Oct 1, 2013, 06:23 PM (0 replies)
Really gets going about half way through...
Here's the full 20 minutes if you have time to watch it:
Posted by FourScore | Tue Oct 1, 2013, 02:37 PM (4 replies)
Sat Sep 28, 2013 at 05:00 AM PDT
Bill Maher has excellent news on why conservatives REALLY fear California
Last night, Bill Maher explained the real reason conservatives should be so afraid of California — because we're a living experiment that shows everything they've been preaching is pure unadulterated bullshit.
And finally, New Rule: Conservatives who love to brag about American exceptionalism must come here to California, and see it in person. And then they should be afraid. Because while right-wingers are taking over places like North Carolina and Texas and even Wisconsin, California is creating the kind of modern, liberal nation the country as a whole can only dream about. And not only can't the rest of the country stop us — we're going to drag you with us. (audience cheering and applause)
Now, it wasn't that long ago that pundits were calling California a failed state and saying it was ungovernable. But in 2010, when other states were busy electing whatever Tea Partier claimed to hate government the most, we elected a guy who actually liked it — Jerry Brown. And without a Republican governor and without a legislature cock-blocked by Republicans, (audience laughter) a $27 billion deficit was turned into a surplus.
How? Well it's amazing, really. We did something economists call cutting spending and raising taxes. (audience applause) I know, it sounds like crazy science fiction, but you see, here in California, we're not just gluten-free and soy-free and peanut-free, we're Tea Party free! (massive audience cheering and applause)
Yes, we can live in reality! I mean, Texas could do it too, but they love "freedom" too much. Like when that unregulated fertilizer plant blew up. In California, when things blow up, it's because we're making a Jason Statham movie. No, California is not perfect, but it is in our nature to try new things. For example, now that it's clear Obamacare is going to be a success here, the movement to just go all the way to single payer is gathering steam. (audience applause)
In lots of areas, California has decided not to wait around for the caboose part of America to get on board. Yokels can mock "European style democracies" all they want. We're building one here — gay marriage, pot smoking, regulating carbon. And people like it. The same way when Americans come back from a vacation in Europe, they all say the same thing: "I saw titties on the beach!" (audience laughter) But they also remark on the modern airports and train stations over there, and the absence of beggars in the street, and food that tastes like food. (audience applause) And they wonder, "Why can't we get that here?"
Well, you will be getting that here, courtesy of the Golden State. Why? Because we're huge. We're huge! 40 million of us! (audience cheering) When we demand something, the market must supply it. Like when California set a high mileage standard for cars sold in this state, Detroit had to make more efficient cars. California by itself is the 8th largest economy in the world, the fifth largest agricultural exporter, and of course, #1 in laser vaginal rejuvenation. (audience laughter) Oh, I pat myself on the back.
You know, it's so ironic, the two things conservatives love the most — the free market and states rights — are the two things that are going to bend this country into California's image as a socialist fagtopia. (audience cheering and applause) Maybe our constipated Congress in Washington can't pass gun control laws, but we just did. Because we don't give a shit about the NRA. Out here, that stands for "Nuts, Racists, and Assholes." (massive audience cheering and applause)
And while other state governments are working with Jesus to make abortion more miserable — because otherwise women would just use it for weight loss (audience oohs) — California is making it easier. And while immigrants are demonized in Washington and elsewhere, in California we just OK'd driver's licenses for undocumented aliens. (audience applause) That's right, we're letting them drive cars — just like white people! Because we can't be worrying about all the nonsense that keeps Fox News viewers up at night, when they should be in bed adjusting their sleep apnea mask. (audience laughter)
So in conclusion, my message to the rest of America is just this: DO NOT RESIST!! Kneel before Zod! California has been setting the trend in America for decades, and it's not going to stop now. We say jump, you say, "Please, sell me new exercise clothes for jumping." (audience applause) We said put cilantro in food, and dammit, you did, you put cilantro in food, even though neither one of us knows what it is. And almond milk? Come on! We just had some extra almonds and thought we'd fuck with you. (audience laughter)
Bill Maher also wrote up a fuller version of this New Rule over at Huffington Post. One part that was cut out for time that was a good explanation of what happened was this.
Since then, everything Republicans say can't or won't work — gun control, immigration reform, high-speed rail — California is making work. And everything conservatives claim will unravel the fabric of our society — universal healthcare, higher taxes on the rich, gay marriage, medical marijuana — has only made California stronger. And all we had to do to accomplish that was vote out every single Republican.
Posted by FourScore | Sat Sep 28, 2013, 02:29 PM (15 replies)
Fri Sep 27, 2013 at 03:04 PM PDT
AWESOME Vanity Fair Piece on the GOP lies about Obamacare
by Fokozatos siker
There's a fabulous piece online about the Republican's relentless and dishonest assault on Obamacare, detailing and refuting all of the lies that they have been telling to counter it. The headline says it all:
"Are Republicans So Frantic to Stop Obamacare Because They Fear It Will Work?"
...Unlike the Chuck Todds of the world, this piece is one where the reporter picks a corner, defends it and then attacks, ripping apart the GOPs deceit with skill and not a little viciousness. It was a delight to read. From the opening paragraph, the relentlessness is apparent
What is it about Obamacare that compels seemingly intelligent people to explode in bubbling spasms of stupid? Are they misinformed? Unable to see past the rage-fueled partisan sweat dripping into their eyes? Or just plain dishonest?
The piece then highlights what I have been saying for a long time about the GOP and their attacks on Obamacare: That they are going to look terrible in the future once the history is told.
At this point, it has become obvious that history will look back on the four-year war on Obamacare as one of the saddest, most bizarre, and most dishonestly embarrassing episodes of our time. I have given up trying to understand the vehement opposition of so many who cannot offer up truthful reasons for their objections, and instead fuel the hatred and fears of the uninformed with the most illogical, mendacious, and fundamentally bizarre arguments that have ever been marshaled. By comparison, Joe McCarthy’s McCarthyistic McCarthyism was an exercise in reason.
The piece then goes down the list - death panels, government takeover of health care, Washington dictating treatments and on and on and on. It goes after the lies, the conservative academics who push out purported "independent analysis" that is bogus, and on and on and on. Recently, conservative nut Betsy McGaughy argued that Obamacare would force doctors to ask patients about their sex lives and bemoaned the horrors of electronic medical records. The Vanity Fair piece responds:
The time may well have come to reconsider whether (McGaughy) should ever be taken seriously again. That is, if you have in the past. In fact, her new diatribe suggests either she has a really bad doctor or she needs to see a good one... know that there are plenty of social conservatives who consider sex to be something icky that should never be discussed or something immaculate that shouldn’t be enjoyable, but the reality is, good doctors ask about sex. That is not an Obamacare requirement—it is something that medical students learn in their first year when studying how to take a history and physical of a patient....This is part of what is called “social history,” and it is a critical part of any medical examination. That involves smoking history, use of alcohol, other drug use, and, yes, sex. The discussion of sexual matters is not so the doctor can run off into the next room and giggle about pee-pees. It is an essential part of any medical exam because it can be a key contributor to someone’s health.
Then, on medical records, the piece notes that the largest health care company in the world uses them, and boasts that they "improve 'safety, quality, effectiveness, and efficiency of health care." Then the author writes:
Safety, quality, effectiveness, and efficiency? What a nightmare! Betsy, you better call (the company) right now and let them know that their system to make medical care better does not have your stamp of approval because—hell, I don’t know. You never explain a reason other than to suggest that the next Edward Snowden will leak everyone’s health-care information before fleeing to Russia.
I can't quote anymore without violating fair use, but it is a lengthy piece worth a read. Plus, it is apparently just part one. The second part about the truth of Obamacare is going to be posted next week.
Posted by FourScore | Sat Sep 28, 2013, 01:51 PM (5 replies)
Fri Sep 27, 2013 at 08:57 AM PDT
Daily Beast: End Days for the GOP
From Michael Tomasky at The Daily Beast:
Watching the GOP convulse these last few days, I sense that we just might finally be on the cusp of an important and long-awaited moment. Up until now during the Obama era, the Republicans’ scorched-earth politics have harmed their party, but they have always harmed the Democrats nearly as much—or, in the long term, even more. It’s a big reason why they do the things they do—they know cynically that if they bring the government to a standstill, most people will just blame both parties, and indeed might even cast more blame on the party of government, the Democrats.
The gig may be about up. The odds are good that by the morning of October 18, one of two (correct) perceptions will be broadly held by the American public: one, that the Republican Party has collapsed into all-out ideological civil war; two, that the Republicans are a party not merely of obstructionists but destructionists, in ways that will be so evident that even those independents devoted to the idea that both sides are to blame will run up the white flag. All the Republicans’ madness of the last five years is finally going to catch up with them.
Tomasky ascribes the GOP's doomsday predicament to three events: Calgary Cruz's phony filibuster, this weekend's government funding vote in Congress, and the debt ceiling fight. The lattermost began yesterday, according to Tomasky, when the GOP's ludicrous list of terrorist demands was leaked. It has already been roundly ridiculed by most of the MSM, including a damning editorial in today's New York Times:
A Republican Ransom Note
...House leaders responded on Thursday with one of the least serious negotiating proposals in modern Congressional history: a jaw-dropping list of ransom demands containing more than a dozen discredited Republican policy fantasies.
That's brutal, coming from the NYT Editorial Board, IMO. Tomasky's piece in The Daily Beast sums it up nicely:
You can only set so many houses on fire before people finally figure out that this isn’t happening by accident and you must be an arsonist. The GOP is now flirting with that moment. It can’t come soon enough.
Posted by FourScore | Fri Sep 27, 2013, 05:05 PM (1 replies)