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Member since: Thu Oct 21, 2004, 06:06 PM
Number of posts: 18,656

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Wisconsinites Alarmed That Walker Has More Time to Be Governor / Satire by Borowitz

MADISON, WISCONSIN (The Borowitz Report)—In the aftermath of his sudden withdrawal from the Presidential race, on Monday, residents of Wisconsin are alarmed at the prospect of Scott Walker having more time to do his job as governor, Wisconsinites report.

In interviews across the state, Wisconsinites expressed emotions ranging from dread to panic as they grappled with the realization that Walker would soon be back behind his desk performing his duties.

“Earlier this spring, when he was riding high in the polls, a lot of my friends and I were thinking, ‘This is the break we’ve been looking for,’ ” said Carol Foyler of Green Bay. “We definitely had our hopes up.”
Tracy Klugian of Milwaukee agreed. “I don’t know a person in Wisconsin who wasn’t pumped about the idea of Scott Walker going to Washington,” he said. “And then we watched that first debate.” He shuddered at the memory.

In the hours after the governor’s stunning announcement, on Monday, Wisconsinites formed support groups to help each other navigate the reality of Walker turning his full attention to their state.

At a meeting of one of the groups on Tuesday evening, Kenosha resident Harland Dorrinson expressed confidence that his fellow Wisconsinites would be able to contend with their new situation. “People in Wisconsin are stronger than you can imagine,” he said. “We’ve been through blizzards. We’ve been through tornadoes. We’ll get though this somehow.”

“Still, it’s tough,” he said, his voice breaking.


My "reject" for the Sept. contest. But it should not just crack me up - so I share.

Wanna guess where this road side attraction might have been?


Adding this a little later:

I’ve been asked by pm if this is a dead dog or a trained dog.
It is a dog that is trained to make money for his owner and get treats for himself, and since I saw him take position and then get back out I was all clear to me in reality and emotionally that it is not a dead dog.

I was also informed about the death of OhWiseOne’s dog with the wonderfully soulful chastised eyes in the beach photo.
I am sad about that. It’s a terrible pain to lose a pet. They so much love you anyway and never talk back. A huge loss.

So I just have to let this post stand and allow it to rest in peace.
Sorry if I offended or startled anyone.

Would you like to know what I had to do during the Republican Debates just now?

Yell - scream - throw things - laugh - and study lots of faces. The disdain and worry on Trump's and the bubbling hatred on Fiorinas.

But, not until Jeb said in response to the question about not using his last name, and being his own man, and all that crap he pulls forth when his basic embarassment about his brother is addressed

not until he defiantly and small uppity boy like looked into the camera and said:
One thing we must say about my brother's leadership is that he kept us safe

not til then did I bother to upload this little jewel

Millions Watch American Democracy’s Final Episode - Borowitz is on it

SIMI VALLEY, CALIFORNIA (The Borowitz Report)—American democracy, a long-running institution whose popularity endured for over two hundred years, drew millions of viewers to its final episode Wednesday night.

While the official ratings for democracy’s finale will not be available until Thursday, initial reports indicated that a larger than expected number tuned in to witness the last moments of the nation’s system of government.

Network executives had warned that the final episode was not for the squeamish, but many viewers were still shocked by how dark and apocalyptic it turned out to be.
One reviewer, calling the finale a “shattering conclusion,” wrote, “For casual fans of American democracy who weren’t paying much attention to it lately, what they saw in Wednesday’s episode must have come as a shock: a cast of characters who were thoroughly unlikable, unappealing, and, in the end, totally unredeemed.”

Still, based on the strong ratings for Wednesday’s episode, network executives decided to “supersize” democracy’s death throes by scheduling a dozen additional episodes between now and November, 2016.

In the words of one executive, “American democracy is not as popular as it once was, but a lot of people still want to see how it ends.”


Wearing my Jackson Pollock outfit, I had a moment of fun yesterday

I'm in the process of painting the inside of a large house, by myself, and when I get there to work I lock myself in and put on my totally spattered painting clothes and pretend I'm Jackson Pollock. Yesterday I got hungry, and went around the corner to a neighborhood store without changing my clothes, hoping I wouldn't run into anyone I know. As I stood in line some dark-skinned Mexican young ones were running around playing tag and laughing loud.

The man behind me waiting his turn was rough looking. So rough in fact I cut him a wide berth - smell - tobacco chew and all were not of interest. Neither really was his commentary on the children but it was directed at me:
"When we was young we was taught better. We weren't allowed to run around and we was disciplined. I guess that woman is their mother" - he pointed to a young Mexican woman who was paying her bill - "but she probably don't speak English so there is nothing we can do. Ain't I right? We would have been whupped!?"

I looked him over, stepped a bit closer, smiled, and said: "Yes. Prob'ly so. And just look at how we turned out."

Then I went into my truck that says: "DEMOCRATS - We aren't perfect - but they are nuts" and drove off looking back at him and waved.

If it's about Trump - it might be folk art. Discovery in downtown NC nightwalk

Went to a block party last night, and someone was carrying this under their arm. I borrowed it and set it on the nearest trashcan to take it's picture.
Local artist is selling these for $ 29 / framed.

Looking for entries seasonal photo contest: "Summer" scenes


I'm posting this for a la isquierda, the hostess, who is traveling during the submission period and does not have the ability to do it herself.
Summer is still all around you, find your best shot, or take the opportunity to go shooting.
and then please enter it for us to see

Party That Mocked President’s Lack of Experience Favors One with No Experience Whatsoever/ Borowitz

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Republicans, who mercilessly mocked Barack Obama’s lack of government experience before he became President, now favor Presidential candidates with no experience whatsoever, the head of the Republican National Committee has confirmed.

The R.N.C. chief, Reince Priebus, said that he sees “no contradiction at all” between Republicans’ contempt for Obama’s pre-White House résumé, which included eleven years spent in public office, and their rabid enthusiasm for G.O.P. rising stars Donald Trump, Ben Carson, and Carly Fiorina, whose combined years in public office total zero.

"I think what bothered us Republicans the most about Obama was that he was a community organizer,” Priebus explained. “What does organizing people have to do with running a government?”

In contrast with that dubious credential, he said, Carson is “eminently qualified” to be President because of his experience as a neurosurgeon. “I think if Ben had negotiated with the Iranians we would have gotten a better deal, because he would have known how their brains worked, medically and all,” Priebus argued.

Additionally, the R.N.C. boss said that the billionaire Donald Trump’s experience puts him “leagues ahead” of President Obama. “One of President Obama’s problems is that he is out of touch with reality,” Priebus said. “Donald Trump spent fourteen seasons hosting a reality show.”

As for the former Hewlett-Packard C.E.O. Carly Fiorina, Priebus said that the excitement her résumé is generating among the Republican faithful is totally understandable. “Like a lot of Republicans, I’d love to see Carly take on ISIS,” he said. “She’s shown she can destroy a large organization.”


Kan ye think of a caption for this? I could't - I was laughing too much

Found this in my inbox this morning. It came from a friend in Germany.
America's antics are circling the globe.

Ignore the profanity and just enjoy - a bit of POTUS levity

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