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Member since: 2002
Number of posts: 67,020

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Granny loves me...

No one Democrat...

Remember that.

You the bull…

From bad to worse...

By the way everyone, I'm tired and cranky now...

Been up all night working on show stuff for my show that playing right now.

If you want a piece of this crankiness, ask me any question while I'm still up.

This ought to be a laugh riot.

From the way that the environs on this damp ball are all out to slay each other

I'm glad that the odds of us spreading this madness to other verdant worlds out there in the universe are somewhere between no way and never.

There are two kinds of people in this world...

People who say they love Cheerios and damn dirty liars!

Just another normal evening in Russia...

About Joan… I can't say anything at all.

There was once a man name Jack Ayes from Dallas, TX who liked to sit on strangers

Basically, this is a hobby that he and his entire family participates in, his beautiful wife, Sandra, as well as their lovely children, Cindy and Baby Tommy. It's something of a family tradition.

One day they were all take a stroll on in the park when they spotted a young man sunning by himself on the park lawn. Jack asked his family if they'd all like to sit on that particular gentleman and they all agreed.

In order to trick the man into thinking that he should readily accept being sat on, Jack asked Sandra to sit on the young man's backside first and then gradually the rest of the family would join her. That's what she proceeded to do. Sandra walked over to the young tanning aficionado as he lay on his stomach and without a howdy-ya-do, just sat down on his rear end.

Well, obviously the young fella was taken quite by surprise at sat on by an uninvited woman. But when he got a closer look at Sandra and realized how attractive she was, that surprise quickly turned to curious bemusement. Once the young man refused to lodge a complaint against a strange, beautiful looking woman, using his rear end like so much lawn furniture, Sandra quickly took this absence of immediate objection as an opportunity to summon the rest the Ayes family to join her.

Well, they all did, and instead of showing deference to the first act of sitting on this, he quickly changed his tune about the rest of the family. It didn't take the young man long to ask everyone whey they chose to sit on him and told them all, in no uncertain terms, to get up off of him right away.

Well, they all refused of course, and there was nothing left to do except for the family to introduce themselves.

"Hello there, young fella. Pleased to meet you" said the father, "My name is Jack Ayes, this lovely woman is my wife, Sandra and these are our children, Cindy and Baby Tommy."

The young man asked again for the family to get up and they all refused, at least for awhile longer. He asked why and the father told him that the reason was simple…

"You see, son. We're the Ayes of Texas and we're upon you and we also intend to stay here for all the live-long day."
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