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Mon Jan 7, 2013, 09:54 PM

G.O.P. Freshmen Saddened by Failure to Shut Down Government on First Day

Just hours after being sworn in at the U.S. Capitol, the freshman class of House Republicans said that they were disappointed that they failed to shut down the government on their first day in office.

“We were all like, ‘O.K., we’re sworn in, let’s shut this thing down,’” said freshman Rep. Byron Ernie (R-Kentucky). “We were all pretty bummed that the government just kept running.”

Rep. Ernie acknowledged that it might have been “overly optimistic” of the freshman Republicans to expect to engineer a government shutdown on their very first day, “but bringing the government to a random standstill was the whole reason we became Republicans,” he said.

House Majority Leader Eric Cantor (R-Virginia) chuckled good-naturedly at the ambitions of the high-spirited G.O.P. freshmen, telling reporters, “I remember what it was like to be young and full of big ideas about crippling our historic institutions for no discernible reason whatsoever. There’s nothing like your first time.”


Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2013/01/gop-freshmen-saddened-by-failure-to-shut-down-government-on-first-day.html

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Reply G.O.P. Freshmen Saddened by Failure to Shut Down Government on First Day (Original post)
Zorro Jan 2013 OP
Aristus Jan 2013 #1
TxDemChem Jan 2013 #2
Agschmid Jan 2013 #7
TxDemChem Jan 2013 #22
southernyankeebelle Jan 2013 #28
TxDemChem Jan 2013 #29
southernyankeebelle Jan 2013 #30
TxDemChem Jan 2013 #31
southernyankeebelle Jan 2013 #32
ChazInAz Jan 2013 #24
morningglory Jan 2013 #27
mindwalker_i Jan 2013 #3
Danascot Jan 2013 #15
quakerboy Jan 2013 #13
niyad Jan 2013 #4
freshwest Jan 2013 #12
Kablooie Jan 2013 #5
NV Whino Jan 2013 #6
Baitball Blogger Jan 2013 #8
Hekate Jan 2013 #9
Proud Liberal Dem Jan 2013 #10
The Wizard Jan 2013 #11
denvine Jan 2013 #14
Tx4obama Jan 2013 #21
Tx4obama Jan 2013 #16
wrenken Jan 2013 #17
Tx4obama Jan 2013 #20
onenote Jan 2013 #25
wrenken Jan 2013 #34
wrenken Jan 2013 #35
chuckrocks Jan 2013 #18
Bozita Jan 2013 #19
lunatica Jan 2013 #23
liberal N proud Jan 2013 #26
Larry66 Jan 2013 #33

Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:12 PM

1. Shit, I thought this was The Onion at first.

What a smelly truckload of diseased dickbags...

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Response to Aristus (Reply #1)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:20 PM

2. I thought this was from The Onion as well.

The New Yorker has been on a roll lately.

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Response to TxDemChem (Reply #2)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:24 PM

7. Welcome to DU!

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Response to Agschmid (Reply #7)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 06:11 AM

22. Thanks

I've been visiting DU for quite a while and I really enjoy this site. I work with a lot of RWNs (Tx you know) and I like having facts to dispute their stupid talking points.

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Response to TxDemChem (Reply #22)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 01:10 PM

28. Facts don't help stupid even when you show it in black and white on paper. They'll say your

 

lying. Remember the polls and fox news telling everyone Obama was going to lose big. See how that went. I found you just can't reason with stupid.

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Response to southernyankeebelle (Reply #28)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 02:17 PM

29. You're right

Pointless exercise.

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Response to TxDemChem (Reply #29)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 03:05 PM

30. I think so. There was a time in TX when you had reasonable people. But until the red is

 

moved to the sidelines then things turn blue your lovely state might have a chance.

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Response to southernyankeebelle (Reply #30)

Wed Jan 9, 2013, 10:32 PM

31. I am so hoping Tx turns blue soon

Although I have noticed my rethug coworkers have toned down their rhetoric a bit. The two worst have very sick husbands who no longer work, but still need health insurance. Both are cancer survivors (one is a triple cancer survivor) and they've recently stopped complaining about the ACA.

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Response to TxDemChem (Reply #31)

Thu Jan 10, 2013, 06:35 AM

32. Yep, funny how they turn blue when they need help. That is how it works.

 

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Response to TxDemChem (Reply #2)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:26 PM

24. I wonder.

Has the New Yorker stolen some writers from the Onion?

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Response to ChazInAz (Reply #24)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:53 PM

27. Is Borowitz writing for NYTimes now? nt

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Response to Aristus (Reply #1)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:20 PM

3. It is actually sarcasm

At the bottom, the column is humor, but I really had to look for it. The article was too close to being totally credible.

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Response to mindwalker_i (Reply #3)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:42 PM

15. I lost my ability

to detect sarcasm during the Bush era.

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Response to Aristus (Reply #1)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:37 PM

13. Borrowitz

Same thing.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:20 PM

4. geez, I know they are stupid, but is it necessary to demonstrate it quite so dramatically?

"we became rethugs to shut down government"? and then, assholes, you STILL expect to get paid your unearned salaries and perks, yes? because THAT, after all, living off the govt teat, is why you REALLLLY became ignorant, hate-filled, reichwing thugs.

okay, I get that it was humour, but, sadly, that is probably exactly the mindset of some of those chowder brains who got elected. it is sad that it is hard to tell an Onion or other article from the actual commentary anymore.

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Response to niyad (Reply #4)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:33 PM

12. Goes to the heart, anyway.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:21 PM

5. Aw, Poor babies! They couldn't destroy our country the first day. So sad.

But don't worry.
They've got 2 years to bring the United States to it's knees.

I can just image the joy when the value of everyone's savings value drops through the floor and people start dying of starvation in the street.
What more could an elected representative of the people want!

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:23 PM

6. He can forfeit his salary and pretend it shut down.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:51 PM

8. What.a.psychopath.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 10:53 PM

9. Whew. The "quote" from Cantor is the giveaway -- it's satire.

You had me going there for awhile.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:06 PM

10. Of course, the sad thing is

that most of the Republicans whom are SERIOUSLY advocating for the government to stop functioning are really talking about putting themselves out of a job. I mean, who do they think "GOVERNMENT" is?


I'm serious. If they manage to shutdown the government, I want everybody whom caused it to happen to be stripped of their paychecks and benefits for as long as it's shut down and they won't be allowed to get it back later. In the real world, if you don't do your job and your business goes under, you're SOL. And we the people need to stop giving them the keys to the car that they keep purposely driving into a ditch. These a**holes need to get a serious dose of reality and I really do hope they get it.........soon.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:24 PM

11. It's The Borowitz Report

satire alert

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:41 PM

14. Wow, we can really put some winners in Washington.

I live in Kentucky, and it is pretty discouraging to have to put up with this guy and my Rep, who's first bill was to repeal the law making schools a no gun zone. Way to go KY.

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Response to denvine (Reply #14)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:57 AM

21. The Borowitz Report is SATIRE

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:42 PM

16. For the folks that do not know - The Borowitz Report is SATIRE.




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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 11:58 PM

17. Is this really serious?

Who needs the Onion when you have Republicans.

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Response to wrenken (Reply #17)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:56 AM

20. The Borowitz Report is SATIRE

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Response to Tx4obama (Reply #20)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:48 PM

25. You can repeat it 50 times and some DUers are still not going to get it.

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Response to onenote (Reply #25)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 11:57 PM

34. Read what I said

You don't get it. Learn how to read.

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Response to onenote (Reply #25)

Sun Jan 13, 2013, 12:00 AM

35. Maybe some People have never read that.

I guess you are better than me. Good for you.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:51 AM

18. Awesomesauce

.

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:54 AM

19. Are these nuts any less terrorists than Muslims with explosives in their underwear?

Just askin' .

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 07:21 AM

23. After reading the first sentence I scrolled down to see the link

Borowitz! Yes! I love that man!

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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Tue Jan 8, 2013, 12:51 PM

26. LOL



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Response to Zorro (Original post)

Thu Jan 10, 2013, 10:50 AM

33. A typical

Typical behavior from the tea-publican party. Complain that govt. doesn't work and that govt. is the problem and then do their best to make sure that they are right. What a bunch of freaking A-holes, I can't believe we have a group of people in this country so brain washed by Faux news they can't figure this out.

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