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Sun Nov 25, 2012, 05:57 PM

On another thread and forum Kentauros and i struck a chord over

the near death experience. I have had one and this good soul asked me to consider posting here. I will. Thank you, Kentaurus.

First of all, in most places here you can't post about these things because you will be trounced. Even people who admit to never having one will pile on because apparently they know something. Or other. Be that as it may, I had a near death experience a few years ago that somehow felt to me like a lesson i had to learn to shake up my trajectory before my life ended and I miss the point of being here. Yes, it felt that clear.

My parents died ten months apart. We were a team. We were a three-headed person. I felt all my life that a greater part of my general purpose was to take care of them and learn as much from them and their example as I could. They were so completely good I have no words to say about it. Suffice it to say, my trajectory was straight down when this happened.

At the point of my NDE I was run down in a major way and struggling with what to do about it. I knew the moment my mother and father slipped away that I was going to have to stay here. Giving up like that is not in the playbook. However, I was really sick and thought I was having a low blood sugar episode. I was standing on a ladder in my sister's warehouse stocking nut and bolt boxes. I climbed down and somehow found my way upstairs to her apartment. i took a cookie and crept to a chair across from where she was sitting and reading during her lunch break.

I remember her asking me what was wrong as I put a cookie in my mouth. Then I died.

It's not what you think it is. I heard a popping sound, the room went from color to black and white, then I died. I remember blackness for about a split second and then color again. The color was astonishing. It was greener green and bluer blue than anything you can ever show me here on Earth. I was on a street in the town next to where I grew up looking at a motel sign that I liked. It was a little mouse in a suit advertising a motel. Now, that sign is battered and faded but there it was perfection.

The grass was soft and green, trees were leafy and tall. The sidewalk was clean and not cracked and old. The sky was a blue that you can only dream of. It was so wonderfully peaceful and calm. Nothing ever here could match it. Then I realized I was lying on my stomach on the grass and someone was standing in front of me.

I remember the white sandals, old fashioned and the young feet wearing them. I looked up slowly and saw a beautiful summer dress with a flowing skirt that stopped in the middle of a teenaged girl's calfs. It was a soft creamy white and had little yellow flowers all over it. It billowed a little around her. I kept looking up and saw that this was my mother when she was about eighteen. She smiled at me, my beautiful, luminous, glorious mother. We didn't say a word but I knew all i needed to know.

I knew I couldn't stay.

I didn't get pushed back. I just knew I was needed, that our family couldn't bear anymore death and that Daddy and Mom's role as caregiver and that was totally made clear was shifting from them to me. I remember feeling completely well and good there. I remember loving her with a purity that is hard to express. Most of what I felt is so understated because human words are inadequate to say what it actually was like. She gave me such love that I remember it still clearly. Then I had to go back. I was looking up at her and then it reversed.

A popping sound, color goes black and white, then I was back. I was incredibly nauseated. I was completely gasping. My sister had seen me die and jumped up. She grabbed me and shook me as hard as she could. She has a grip that could mash steel and is very, very strong. She slapped me and screamed. I didn't hear her until I was back. She said I was gray skinned, my pupils were dilated and there was nothing in me that had form. I was dead limp weight. I was dead.

It took a while to digest this. The illness I had to experience this is inconclusive but I check out well every time I go for my exams. I was given a chance to choose. I was given a chance to see what is waiting for us and decide if what I had to do here was enough. It was. It is beyond me to tell you how wonderful this was. It is beyond me to tell you how I know what I know.

The next life is wonderful but I know that they would be terribly disappointed had I chosen the easy way out. Easy from my point of view. They raised me through great hardship and poured their wisdom and love into me. I owed them a full life where I could become what they were and help my family. I do. I am 'Auntie' who you can come to for help and solace. I am 'Grandmama' to a lonely kid in Georgia who likes to write and loves me because I LISTEN to her.

Notice I didn't see a light, go down a tunnel or see white clothed beings. Only a percentage of people who NDE have that experience. I also learned that hearing the pop is common. My experience is what a percentage of people experience. I learned a number of things:

1. Our egos are the enemy. The ego wants to rule us and when it does, others suffer.
2. There is only love. Its eternal. It surrounds you daily.
3. Death is just another form of living. All those you miss are around you, they hear you, they come when you think of them. Think of them. Pray for them. Love them like they were alive. They need and appreciate that.
4. You are the architect of your life. Be loving and get love. Be good and get goodness. Pray for peace and in the end it will come. We all have to pray for everyone. No one is worthless no matter how much they anger us or do wrong. They are the saddest souls of all.
5. You are never alone. Never.

I have this poem that got me through lots of misery. I will put it here. There are also many strange phenomena that I have experienced in my life and I treasure them all. The afterlife exists. It will be there for all of us in the end. Dying is easy. It's like 'stepping from one room to the next'. (My mother told me that). I personally have no fear of it now. Not after doing it once. In fact, it was the easiest thing I ever did that was monumental. I am in deep gratitude for having been able to have it. It changed my life forever for the good.

``

What is death? By Henry Scott Holland 1847-1918 Canon of St. Paul's Cathedral

Death is nothing at all. I have only slipped away into the next room. I am I and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, that we still are. Call me by my old familiar name. Speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference in your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of a shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same that it ever was. There is absolutely unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?

I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner. All is well.

``

Life is very good, my darlings. The afterlife is right beside you. The ones gone on ahead hear you and help you when they can. I have always heard their voices. It is part of our natural life of living, dying and living again. This is what I saw, heard and feel I know. I am delighted to share it with you.

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Arrow 18 replies Author Time Post
Reply On another thread and forum Kentauros and i struck a chord over (Original post)
roguevalley Nov 2012 OP
kentauros Nov 2012 #1
felix_numinous Nov 2012 #2
kimmerspixelated Nov 2012 #3
OneGrassRoot Nov 2012 #4
davsand Nov 2012 #5
Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #6
Tsiyu Nov 2012 #7
southerncrone Nov 2012 #8
Flying Dream Blues Nov 2012 #9
Sienna86 Nov 2012 #10
PADemD Nov 2012 #11
Why Syzygy Nov 2012 #12
kentauros Nov 2012 #14
Why Syzygy Nov 2012 #16
kentauros Nov 2012 #17
get the red out Nov 2012 #13
felix_numinous Nov 2012 #15
Mnemosyne Nov 2012 #18

Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Sun Nov 25, 2012, 08:15 PM

1. Thanks for posting this, rv!

Your experience reminds me of the one Denise Linn relates in one of her books. Whereas the one that Anita Moorjani had, her existence in the next life was not of having a body or seeing anyone in a body, but of being pure energy and thought only. I know she's said her experience may have been molded by not having a religious preference or conviction in life, so her perception of death wasn't molded a certain way. Yet, even as I'm in a similar boat, I still don't know what to expect in my own transition. I'm sure I'll be happy with it, whatever the outcome

Most people that have NDEs also can't put into words what the feelings are like. Unconditional Love has to be experienced to be known. I suppose if telepathy were common, then the rest of us would understand better.

The "pop" part is also common to people having OBEs for the first time or the first few times. It seems to go away after you have them more often and you just learn the vibrational feel to the beginning of an OBE. My thinking is that the "pop" is an uncontrolled release of the spirit from the body, and why those that have out of body experiences are able to control the release as they learn the best techniques. Makes me wonder if someone experienced in OBEs would get that pop in an NDE...

The "fears" I have toward death isn't the death itself, but of first, not wanting to leave right now, and second, any suffering I'll have to go through leading up to death. Sure, death is a release of pain, yet you still have to suffer that pain before death, and why I don't look forward to the end of my life, even if I'd been fortunate enough to have an NDE

However, the experience of an NDE would probably suppress pain and suffering more due to knowing what that existence will be in the next life. Or, you may find that you're healthier now and won't have to go through such suffering at the end of your life. Your body will simply "stop" and you'll be Out There again

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Sun Nov 25, 2012, 08:29 PM

2. Thank you for writing

about your experience. roguevalley. You are welcome here.

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Sun Nov 25, 2012, 08:45 PM

3. I may just have to break down and cry.

Whatever we were to each other, that we still are.

All those you miss are around you, they hear you, they come when you think of them. Think of them. Pray for them. Love them like they were alive. They need and appreciate that.


A lot of good stuff here. Thanks rogueval!

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Sun Nov 25, 2012, 09:57 PM

4. I did just break down and cry.

Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for sharing your experience.



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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Sun Nov 25, 2012, 10:31 PM

5. Thank you for being willing to share this with us.

In a lot of places it feels really risky to speak openly about anything like this--at least I felt that way... I have never experienced what you described, but I also carry the conviction that it does not end when we depart these bodies--this existence. My realization came as a result of a visit from someone I loved very much who passed with no goodbyes even being possible. She said it only gets better after this, and that there is nothing to fear. I trust her in death every bit as much as I did in life, and I've carried that with me every day since she died almost 20 years ago.

Took me several years to be able or willing to talk about my experience with ANYONE except my husband. This group was the first place I ever spoke about it publicly, and I have never met with anything here other than affection and acceptance.

Thank you so very much for being willing to trust us with this gift of shared information.



Laura

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Sun Nov 25, 2012, 11:58 PM

6. Wow! Fascinating!

I have a large mahogany buffet that I use for an altar. I burn candles and have various statues and pictures of my deceased family and friends that I rotate.

When somebody famous dies that I cared about I will put their picture or a vinyl record cover on my altar. I did this with Dietrich Fischer-Dieskau and Clarence Clemons when they died.



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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Mon Nov 26, 2012, 12:16 AM

7. One of the finest threads I've read in here


Thanks so much for sharing this personal experience with us. I think now - around the holidays when we remember and miss our loved ones - is the most absolutely perfect time to post this.

I have an altar - a shelf where I have pictures and handouts from memorials of those who have passed - so I talk to them and they are part of the "scene." They don't talk back, of course, but the memories of their personalities are easily available to me. I can imagine what they might say in a given situation.

Most of the time I pass by the altar, and I'm rather obsessive if someone puts their drink or gloves there, but the collection of mementos of those I knew and loved is comforting to me.

Hard to explain, but it works for me. I don't know where we go, I only know that some souls ( all souls if they want ) are so fine, they should continue










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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Mon Nov 26, 2012, 01:36 AM

8. Thank you!

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Mon Nov 26, 2012, 12:32 PM

9. Thanks for sharing this, RogueValley!

I haven't had an NDE but I have no doubts it is as you describe. What a beautiful, life altering experience!

I also feel my loved ones around me, ask for their help and guidance and even, from time to time, "hear" them tell me things. Most of the time, they say it in a way that surprises me, so it helps me know that I'm not "making it up."

Thank you for the reminder that they are here always!



Edited to fix smilie

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Mon Nov 26, 2012, 01:54 PM

10. That was beautiful.

Thank you for sharing your personal story.

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Tue Nov 27, 2012, 08:39 AM

11. Thank you so much for posting this.

Your beautiful post brought tears to my eyes.

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 12:29 AM

12. This ..

along with the other NDE stories I've read/heard NOW make me wonder if the part of us that *dies* is the Ego. NDE's, like DMT and other entheogens, remove that "I-ness". They produce the love and unity we all long for. That isn't possible when the Ego is in operation.

A bunch of people probably already figured this out. It just now clicked into place for me. If this is the case,
the death of the Ego, oh glorious day!

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Response to Why Syzygy (Reply #12)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 01:03 PM

14. Anita Moorjani likened the experience to

"waking up" as this life were "like" a dream. If so, then it's a very complex dream! And I know I've read of others that have had NDEs as seeing it in a similar way (so I don't seem like I'm focused only on her perspective, only the most recent book I've read on the subject.) Maybe this reality is the holographic projection from our higher selves. I know that I now think of "past lives" differently. I see them more as "alternate lives" or "concurrent lives". There is no "past" any more.

One of the HayHouse authors I've been listening to lately (either Wayne Dyer or Alan Cohen) said something about the ego recently. That is, we need our egos to function in life. While "death of the ego" is something that will happen when we die here, we still need them. What we have to strive for is not letting the ego rule us.

At least I think that's what was being said

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Response to kentauros (Reply #14)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 08:36 PM

16. Ego...

Michael Tsarion says the same thing about ego. In his research, the ego was born after the earth had gone through tremendous upheaval and catastrophes. It was a survival mechanism. And indeed, it is required to live on this planet in this space/time. And, as you say, it is only when we allow the ego to run the show that we get into 'trouble'. I'm glad to hear that verified through your sources!

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Response to Why Syzygy (Reply #16)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 09:55 PM

17. I'm glad I made sense!



I wasn't sure if I had heard the original sources correctly, going by memory only. I guess it made some kind of sense to me when I heard it such that it 'stuck'.

And while I don't read that much on NDEs, I like that my ideas on it are changing. I'm still developing concepts around Moorjani's experience, in addition to roguevalley's and Denise Linn's. There's just so much to what we call the After Life, and everyone has there perspective of what they've seen or experienced. It's rather fascinating, to say the least!

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 11:16 AM

13. Thank you for that

That's a beautiful telling of your experience. Much appreciated.

Welcome to ASAH!!!!

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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 03:21 PM

15. Beautiful!

you can share on this site too if you want:

http://www.nderf.org/ They continually get new entries






Sorry my new kitten did something to make this a big page and I don't know how to delete it...his name is Felix




















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Response to roguevalley (Original post)

Fri Nov 30, 2012, 11:29 PM

18. This is so comforting, rogue. I've always just known it was just a step away, it seemed close.

I always picture passed loved ones as doing whatever they loved, like on a vacation. Mom was a shopper and proud of it, I just see her in Kmart!

I read numerous books on this subject, and reincarnation, many moons ago. I enjoyed reading your experience very much. Thank you for sharing.

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