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Tue Dec 25, 2012, 04:37 PM

I'm finally coming to the conclusion, or accepting that my mother is bipolar and I have been

affected by it my whole life. I have a worse case than her and her mother had a worse case than both of us, (although she refused to be treated so who knows). But my contentious relationship with my mother I always blamed on myself and now I am thinking about not doing that so much anymore.

She can be so mean and she can yell and talk over you and she won't listen to a word you have to say. She lost a family business, (an apartment complex) because she did not have flood insurance on it when Sandy hit. She says it is an act of God. I say it is bad management. But I do not throw it up in her face although this place was supposed to be in a trust for me and my brother and especially for me since I have been on disability because of my bipolar for years.

So anyway she lists the land with a realtor and 2 weeks later gets a private bid for literally 57% of the asking price and she accepts it. So I fucking freak out. She just says she wants to be rid of it. She wants to "retire", (as if it is that much work anyway, I managed the place for 10 years, it is not that much work).

So anyway no matter what I say it doesn't matter. She listens to nothing. So I wait until she is in church, (she is down in FL now because she spends her winters here.....yet she must retire from the job that she doesn't do 9 months out of the year), and I go into her house and take all the papers so she can't go through with it.

So of course she comes over to my house screaming and then she calls the fucking cops on me! I had previously told her if she was going to continue to scream like that then she had to get out of my house so I heard her saying she was going to call the cops so I just shut my shades and locked the doors and didn't answer. This I don't know how I will ever forgive her for. I just want her to listen to me!!!!!

So now it is Christmas and I have spent the whole day alone. I could have gone to this clubhouse I go to for breakfast but I didn't feel like it. I have been crying on and off all day. I read online one specialist say that a diagnosis of bipolar comes when you have one manic episode. Well she has admitted to one episode, when she was in NJ when I wasn't around she told me she got manic. I remember she was not sleeping and she had a fight with someone working at the apartments. That's all I know. I'm sure there is more to the story.

So yes I am crazy but my mother is crazy too. And damn it I am tired of taking the blame for fucking everything. I am tired of being the only black sheep in a family of black sheep!

What the Hell do I do now?

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Reply I'm finally coming to the conclusion, or accepting that my mother is bipolar and I have been (Original post)
Maraya1969 Dec 2012 OP
Duer 157099 Dec 2012 #1
Denninmi Dec 2012 #2
Maraya1969 Dec 2012 #3
Tobin S. Dec 2012 #4
elleng Dec 2012 #5

Response to Maraya1969 (Original post)

Tue Dec 25, 2012, 04:45 PM

1. I'm sorry



Come to DU and vent, just like you've done. We're here.

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Response to Maraya1969 (Original post)

Tue Dec 25, 2012, 06:17 PM

2. You do what you have to to put yourself first.

That can be a lot of things, from severing ties to seeking treatment to pampering yourself. Whatever it is, you 'll know it when you see it.

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Response to Maraya1969 (Original post)

Tue Dec 25, 2012, 07:41 PM

3. Addendum

Well I finally called my mother and she came over and it was very tense for a while but I finally relented about the property, (I am just over it and at this point I am tired of fighting) and she agreed, sort of, to see a doctor about bipolar. She did not say she was bipolar but she said she would see a doctor. She also apologized several times for calling the cops on me and said she would never do it again. I think she finally realized that putting the mentally ill in jail is just not the way to go and that she could have really hurt me.

I apologized to her for all the awful things I said. I didn't apologize for taking her papers because it was that act that got us to talk.

So if anyone has any good vibes left over please send them my way. (I say left over because I really feel like mine are all used up. )

Thanks for being here my friends.

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Response to Maraya1969 (Reply #3)

Tue Dec 25, 2012, 07:49 PM

4. It's also possible that your mother is suffering from a

personality disorder and not really a mental illness in the classic sense.

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Response to Maraya1969 (Reply #3)

Tue Dec 25, 2012, 08:29 PM

5. Sending vibes ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

and glad you're here, esp since Den and Tobin are too; 2 good and wise and experienced guys.

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