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Gormy Cuss

(30,884 posts)
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 08:25 PM Aug 2014

The One Word Men Never See In Their Performance Reviews

The One Word Men Never See In Their Performance Reviews

There's one adjective that's never used to criticize men, yet it shows up at an alarming rate in women's performance reviews.

By Kathleen Davis

It’s a scenario that could be straight out of a textbook on gender bias:

“Jessica is really talented, but I wish she’d be less abrasive. She comes on too strong.” Her male counterpart? “Steve is an easy case, smart and great to work with. He needs to learn to be a little more patient, but who doesn’t?”

These statements, uttered by an engineering manager who was preparing performance reviews, were the catalyst for linguist Kieran Snyder to see if she could quantify the double standards in the way male and female employees are evaluated....


Interesting, if small study.





http://www.fastcompany.com/3034895/strong-female-lead/the-one-word-men-never-see-in-their-performance-reviews
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The One Word Men Never See In Their Performance Reviews (Original Post) Gormy Cuss Aug 2014 OP
I have often gotten reviews, over all positive, with a little character nugget in there kdmorris Aug 2014 #1
"Nurturing"? Curmudgeoness Aug 2014 #2
Yep, my male boss said that kdmorris Aug 2014 #5
"Yep, my male boss said that (nurturing)" Spitfire of ATJ Aug 2014 #10
Gads, that was insulting. Gormy Cuss Aug 2014 #11
When my husband took his first job out of college, his boss was woodsprite Aug 2014 #3
The Double Bind. Curmudgeoness Aug 2014 #4
In my last company, in 2000, we had layoffs kdmorris Aug 2014 #6
I'd rather be an Ice Queen Curmudgeoness Aug 2014 #8
Among the things that were noted on my review. . . Paula Sims Aug 2014 #7
I'd hire you on that review. nt Curmudgeoness Aug 2014 #9

kdmorris

(5,649 posts)
1. I have often gotten reviews, over all positive, with a little character nugget in there
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:30 PM
Aug 2014

"more patient with others", "learn to control emotions". When I was training a fellow employee (a man), I was told that I needed to be more nurturing. That really burned me up. I KNEW he got paid more than me and he refused to work independently (he didn't do anything without asking me how to do it first, even things I'd told - and showed - him how to do 3 times before) and *I'm* the one that was told to work harder and do better.

But there's no double standard in the workplace... riiiigggghhhttt.

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)
2. "Nurturing"?
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:39 PM
Aug 2014

Did they really say "nurturing"? Shit.

I am sure it was just that you were not teaching well.

My reviews have been very positive on the work, and very critical on the personality end. I suffer no fools. Thank goodness that I am damned good at the work side.

kdmorris

(5,649 posts)
5. Yep, my male boss said that
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:51 PM
Aug 2014

Luckily we were doing it on the phone (I work at home) or I couldn't have put myself on mute to tell him where he could shove it.

woodsprite

(11,829 posts)
3. When my husband took his first job out of college, his boss was
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:44 PM
Aug 2014

A wonderful lady who has been a great mentor as he's been promoted up into management. On his first review, she used the word "brusque" in her evaluation of his demeanor with some coworkers. It's been 30 years, and that comment, more than any other, has stayed with him, and he continues to make an effort that none of his employees can say that about him.

If it had been one of the male reviewers, I'm not even sure that it would have even been mentioned.

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)
4. The Double Bind.
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:47 PM
Aug 2014

From the article:

These findings, while from a small sample size, illustrate a well-documented phenomenon for working women: The Double Bind. The double bind is the idea that if a women is too “nice” at work or uses stereotypically feminine vocal characteristics she’ll be seen as too soft and won’t be taken seriously. On the flip side, if a woman is too assertive she’s seen as brusque and bitchy.


Damned if you do, damned if you don't. You just can't win.

kdmorris

(5,649 posts)
6. In my last company, in 2000, we had layoffs
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:55 PM
Aug 2014

We had two CIO types - one over the software development side and one was the head of the hardware (servers, networks, etc). The CIO of the hardware side was a woman and my CIO was a man. So we all knew one of them would be laid off, but not which one.

They laid off the man and the woman was the one that had to give us the news. She did it professionally, though I'm sure she was shaken.

As we were all filing out, I heard quite a few of the men say that she was an Ice Queen because "she didn't even cry when she told us that he got laid off."

I was astounded... If the man had been the one not laid off, NO ONE would have said shit if he didn't cry.

Paula Sims

(877 posts)
7. Among the things that were noted on my review. . .
Thu Aug 28, 2014, 09:55 PM
Aug 2014

1. My standards for excellence are too high

2. I shouldn't carry my own presentation materials to a meeting (pre-Power Point days).


<<sigh>>

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