HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Topics » Gender & Orientation » Men's Group (Group) » What do you do when someo...

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 06:43 PM

What do you do when someone you trusted turns on you?

How do you deal with that, emotionally? Pragmatically?

10 replies, 1123 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 10 replies Author Time Post
Reply What do you do when someone you trusted turns on you? (Original post)
Denninmi Feb 2013 OP
Major Nikon Feb 2013 #1
Denninmi Feb 2013 #2
Major Nikon Feb 2013 #3
Denninmi Feb 2013 #4
MrSlayer Feb 2013 #5
NRA_SUCKS Feb 2013 #10
Inkfreak Feb 2013 #6
lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #7
Denninmi Feb 2013 #8
lumberjack_jeff Feb 2013 #9

Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 06:55 PM

1. I remember what Bob Marley said...

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for."

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Major Nikon (Reply #1)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 06:57 PM

2. Is anyone really worth suffering over?

Life is too short for suffering.

I wondered how guys who have been in bitter divorces, for example, cope with it.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Denninmi (Reply #2)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 07:01 PM

3. If we don't suffer occassionally the good times wouldn't be so good

Some people are worth the suffering. Divorce is for people who aren't.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Major Nikon (Reply #3)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 07:04 PM

4. I don't know - I guess if there is hope things will improve.

I still think it would be very hard to get though the bad times in a relationship if they were really bad. When it gets to the point of pathological hatred then I really don't know how you could deal with it.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 07:39 PM

5. I give second chances for most things.

 

But I never trust again.

I believe in the adage that a friend must prove themselves over and over while an enemy need only prove themselves once.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to MrSlayer (Reply #5)

Wed Feb 13, 2013, 10:06 PM

10. Sadly I do that too...

 

I'm too forgiving to a point that I expect to get hurt anymore... sadly i'm rarely disappointed =
the worst pain and violation is always from women I trust, such as my exwife.
maybe it's me. the pain is far less than it was when i was forced to leave but, the anger and resentment seems to linger.

I'm seeing a shrink, but it's so hard to WANT to forgive my ex... and pretty much all women for what was done to me because I see the same patterns in every woman I know, with few exceptions. *sighs8
sorry /rant.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Wed Feb 13, 2013, 04:06 PM

6. I tend to distance myself from that person

I tend to not place a lot of trust in people. This I consider a failing of mine. I had some issues early on in my life with some people. Nothing earth shattering, but as a young man, these experiences shaped a lot of my relationships with people. I most likely missed out on some possible great friendships if I'd been a little more trusting. I try to do better these days. It's difficult tho. Anyways, I lurked upon your post & liked the question.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Wed Feb 13, 2013, 09:16 PM

7. Reel in the trust circle.

Is that a healthy reaction? Maybe, maybe not.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to lumberjack_jeff (Reply #7)

Wed Feb 13, 2013, 09:36 PM

8. I'm not sure what that means?

Don't trust the person, or anyone? Or, "trust but verify" like with the Soviets during START.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Denninmi (Reply #8)

Wed Feb 13, 2013, 09:51 PM

9. When we're young and naive, we trust everyone.

As we age and that trust is violated, we are less inclined to extend it.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread