Question about an upcoming marriage (3rd time for bride, 4th time

[avebury]

for groom). Does this really warrnt a bridal shower? Of course they want to throw a shower for the bride (she work in our office).
The couple is going to city hall and the shower will be after they actually get married.

Can I get away with just a congratulations card?

I personally think that gifts for a 3rd marriage is ridiculous.

[mythology]

1. You might consider making a donation in their honor to a charity if you know one means

something to the bride and/or groom. Because they probably already have all of the stuff one might get for a normal couple, and it's a good deed.

[jmowreader]

2. A gift card for a prenup would probably be tacky...

[aidbo]

3. Aren't bridal showers supposed to be for young newly(to be)weds so they can furnish a home together?

Seems silly for a third or fourth marriage.
Get them a gift certificate for massage or something.

[raccoon]

4. ITA. nt

[quickesst]

5. Start....

...a Divorce Fund. Kidding! Hope this one works for them.

[GOLGO 13]

6. Erasers. She needs erasers.

He needs to see a shrink.

[we can do it]

7. I am over all the give-me fests.

[Skittles]

10. when did begging become fashionable?

[we can do it]

16. I don't know, at least 25 years.

My partner of 25 years (now wife since we are finally able to be recognized) and I have been bombarded constantly for every wedding, kid function, shower, etc.....We always contribute. So 2 years ago when we were married, we got a couple- "That's nice"...and about the same amount of silence. My aunt did get us some nice custom Christmas ornament, and friends did some nice things for us. But family? Nope. We had planned to have a reception the following summer, but since we didn't even get a card from most everyone we have indulged all this time (and even before I met her) I said- No. We are done.

[Liberal_in_LA]

20. wow.

[davidpdx]

18. Oh you should see what it is here in Korea

Here is isn't gifts, it's straight out money. The bridge and groom plan their shindig at a wedding hall and put down a deposit (I think we out down $300 when my wife and I got married) and then each guest is suppose to sign the guestbook and hand an envelope with at least $50 each. Those that don't give typically are looked down on (wasn't the case with me because I didn't care given it wasn't my culture that was pressuring them to give money). At the end of the night the wedding hall hands you a bill minus your deposit and that is what you owe. The hope is that (much like a business) you had enough people giving generously that it covered the amount that was left over.

Koreans also give money on other holidays, which bothers me. I mean I know my grandma and grandpa use to send me money in cards when I was younger, but to do it for a wedding is outrageous.

[3catwoman3]

8. Hopefully they have...

Last edited Thu Nov 26, 2015, 09:47 PM - Edit history (1)

...both a seen shrink. How many times can you say, " 'Til death do us part," and have anyone take you seriously?

My husband was married once before, when he was young and foolish. His ex-wife is on husband #4 (my husband was victim #1). Big church wedding each time, complete with reception and gifts. Hubbies 2,3,and 4 were all found thru her church's divorce support group. First marriage lasted 6 years, second one 8 months, and the third one 3 years. #4 seems to be the keeper - about 20 years. My husband and I are coming up on 34.

I would not go out for coffee with someone who had been divorced 3 times, let alone marry someone with that kind of a track record. Everyone is entitled to one mistake. When you get to 3, it cannot be all the other person's fault.

[mentalsolstice]

11. I agree!

My SiL just divorced her 3d, she was his 4th. I have an ex-boyfriend who's on #4, we had 3-4 year relationship, and if we had married I would've been #2. My husband and I are both still one and only and going on 26 years. I'll give mulligans to those who married their first at an insanely early age, or who have been widowed. However, that was never the in the above mentioned cases, all were in their 20s for their first marriage and none were widowed.

[panader0]

9. My GF's crusty father would give them a washer and drier.

Like a washer for a nut and bolt and a clothespin.

[Iggo]

12. "Does this really warrant a bridal shower?" No.

"Can I get away with just a congratulations card?" Yes. If you don't go to the shower.

[trof]

13. I would send a 'Condolences' card.

[Xipe Totec]

14. Depends on whether you're guided by friendship or protocol nt

[magical thyme]

15. I was protocol-pressured into "giving" at many, many, many

office showers, birthdays, deaths in family, resignations, layoffs, etc.

Somehow when it was my birthday, resignation, layoff, whatever....nothing.

Unless this is a personal friend and you want to celebrate with them, you owe them nothing. Office protocol says a card will do if you don't attend the shower.

[davidpdx]

17. I'd say a card that says "congratulations" on it

with a written note inside that says, "Best of luck. I hope this marriage works out."

[alphafemale]

19. I ignore these gift me gasms.

The same as those annoying turds that mention they have a birthday coming.

"What are you giving me for my birthday?"

"Exactly the same thing you gave me for my birthday"