Ack! Need a good excuse why I forgot to record the Broncos/Colts game!

[beam me up scottie]

oh crap, mr bmus is going to kill me...

[pinboy3niner]

1. You recorded The Horse Whisperer by mistake?

[beam me up scottie]

2. Is it on???

I was going to tell him his show 'Mountain Men' ran over but I forgot to record that one too.

He's from Colorado and doesn't get to see many games and this was going to be a real treat when he came home in the morning.

And he still hasn't forgiven me for betting on Seattle.

oh man, I am so dead.

[pinboy3niner]

7. Colts, Broncos, horsey movies

Easy mistake.

[beam me up scottie]

10. And I am a blonde.

[BlueJazz]

3. Go outside...find the cable that runs into the house (should be white and low.)

1.Get pliers...tear up a little bit of cable. ..2 inches is enough. Be sure to bend/cut the inner copper wire.
Nothing will shock you...very low voltage.
In short, make it look like one of those damn raccoons/fruit rats chewed the cable.

2. Tell the truth.

[beam me up scottie]

5. LOL!

I could blame it on our mare, he forgave her for chewing up his tailgate.

And she didn't bet on Seattle.

[pinboy3niner]

4. For $9.99 you can get the replay

You could just 'fess up and give it to him this way...

NFL Game Rewind
https://gamerewind.nfl.com/nflgr/secure/packages?ttv=0

[BlueJazz]

6. Sounds a little better than my wierd, stupid idea of destroying his cable service

[beam me up scottie]

9. No not at all.

It's completely plausible, our satellite cable has been nibbled on by something but I think it was eaten by our resident snake.

[beam me up scottie]

8. I offered to pay for the NFL Sunday Ticket but he said no.

We don't have high speed internet coverage out here either, I really do feel awful.

[pinboy3niner]

11. In that case, there's only one solution

Charades. You're going to have to act out the game for him.

[beam me up scottie]

12. Perfect!

He is the most competitive person I have ever met, I'll even make a bet with him and when I lose catastrophically he'll forget all about it.

[shenmue]

13. Help help it was the aliens

They shoved a transcorder up your-

[beam me up scottie]

14. They beamed me up!

Oh please please please beam me up before he gets home Scottie!

[Eagle_Eye]

15. Well I ain't got a witness I can't prove it

[font size =5]That's My Story [/font]

(Lee Roy Parnell/Tony Haselden)

I came in as the sun came up
She glared at me over her coffee cup
She said where you been, so I thought real hard and said,
I fell asleep in that hammock in the yard
She said you don't know it boy but you just blew it
I said well that's my story and I'm stickin' to it

That's my story, that's my story
Well I ain't got a witness I can't prove it but
That's my story and I'm stickin' to it

Well I got that deer in the headlights look
She read my face like the cover of a book, and said
Don't expect me to believe all that static
'Cause just last week I through that hammock in the attic
My skin got so thin you could see right through it
And I started that's my story and I'm stickin' to it

That's my story, that's my story
That's my story, that's my story
Well I ain't got a witness I can't prove it but
That's my story and I'm stickin' to it

You know time comes when a wise man knows the best thing
That he can do is just look her up in the eye
And beg for mercy and face the bitter truth

Well honey me and the boys played cards all night
Wasn't no hanky panky not a woman in sight
And I know I shoulda called and baby I'm really sorry
Let's get a cellular phone then you won't have to worry
You know how much I love you and darling I'm ready to prove it
And that's my story and I'm stickin' to it

That's my story, that's my story
That's my story, that's my story
Well I ain't got a witness and you know I can't prove it but
That's my story and I'm stickin' to it

You know I ain't gonna do a thing
Unless you approve it and
That's my story and I'm stickin' to it

[beam me up scottie]

17. "My skin got so thin you could see right through it"

Man do I know that feeling.

Priceless!

[kentauros]

16. Jake is good at this:

"I ran out of gas. I... I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD!"

[beam me up scottie]

18. LMAO!!!

You forgot "I had a feminine hygiene emergency"

[kentauros]

19. You can always adlib

[Brigid]

20. Here ya go:

[kentauros]

24. That's it.

Although serving an orange whip at the door would be a nice additional touch

[MH1]

21. Um, because it's the Broncos/Colts?

Who really wants to watch that anyway?

ok I get that's not helpful. But as a Baltimore native I really don't have much interest in either team. Except for them both to lose! It's hard to imagine why anyone would watch them Ok, Manning. But whatever.

[beam me up scottie]

25. Well...he doesn't say anything when I watch Doctor Who.

I hear you about Manning though.

[newcriminal]

22. Meet him at the door naked.

He'll forget about the game.

[beam me up scottie]

26. I did.

First thing out of his mouth was "Honey this is my friend Jimmy".

[newcriminal]

28. lol

That was good. Made my night. thank you

[tk2kewl]

23. because you're sick of watching Peyton's Papa John's commercials?

[beam me up scottie]

27. Yes.

A squidzillion times yes.

I usually start watching the game and hour late so I can fast forward through them.

[Chan790]

29. You don't need an excuse.

When he comes home, grab him by the shirt, drag him to the bedroom, tear off his clothes, pull him into the bed, you know that thing he really likes, yes, do that thing, then in the post-coital afterglow, say you're sorry but you forgot to record the game.

Odds are, he won't care.

It's probably helpful to know the Broncos won 31-24.

[lame54]

30. You don't know what channel Animal Planet is on

[Generic Brad]

31. Because you can buy it on iTunes?

There is always a convenient back up available.