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Thu Jan 9, 2014, 03:25 PM

21 Truly Upsetting Vintage Recipes

1. Tuna and Jello Pie


11. Super Salad Loaf


16. Banana Candle




Oops! That last one was from Engrish.com Sorry.

More:http://www.buzzfeed.com/ariannarebolini/truly-upsetting-vintage-recipes

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Arrow 40 replies Author Time Post
Reply 21 Truly Upsetting Vintage Recipes (Original post)
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 OP
Xyzse Jan 2014 #1
Autumn Jan 2014 #2
seaglass Jan 2014 #10
myrna minx Jan 2014 #3
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #21
myrna minx Jan 2014 #31
orleans Jan 2014 #26
myrna minx Jan 2014 #30
orleans Jan 2014 #33
baldguy Jan 2014 #4
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #32
TheMightyFavog Jan 2014 #5
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #6
LadyHawkAZ Jan 2014 #8
sir pball Jan 2014 #23
orleans Jan 2014 #27
riderinthestorm Jan 2014 #7
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #9
Marie Marie Jan 2014 #11
malthaussen Jan 2014 #16
XemaSab Jan 2014 #12
hibbing Jan 2014 #13
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #14
NV Whino Jan 2014 #15
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #17
GoCubsGo Jan 2014 #18
NV Whino Jan 2014 #19
riderinthestorm Jan 2014 #20
Joe Shlabotnik Jan 2014 #24
jmowreader Jan 2014 #22
XemaSab Jan 2014 #25
jmowreader Jan 2014 #35
XemaSab Jan 2014 #40
Locut0s Jan 2014 #28
LiberalEsto Jan 2014 #29
jmowreader Jan 2014 #36
Locut0s Jan 2014 #39
jmowreader Jan 2014 #34
Locut0s Jan 2014 #38
LumosMaxima Jan 2014 #37

Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 03:39 PM

1. You know... Me and my brother thank Pixar...

After Ratatouille came out, it seems like interest in fine dining has improved exponentially.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 04:47 PM

2. The Super Salad Loaf terrifies me, on so may levels

Bologna should only be sliced thick and fried crisp.

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Response to Autumn (Reply #2)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 06:25 PM

10. Mashed peas and mayonnaise - I can't think of much that is more disgusting than that. I had to look

up Nucoa and I have no idea what a corn stick is.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 04:52 PM

3. Enjoy the horrors of:

http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/

The gallery of regrettable food. You.Can't.Look.Away.

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Response to myrna minx (Reply #3)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 05:51 PM

21. OMFG!

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Response to LiberalEsto (Reply #21)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 11:00 AM

31. I know! The site is hysterical.

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Response to myrna minx (Reply #3)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 05:36 AM

26. i've only gotten to the second meat picture & i'm absolutely hysterical! (of course i've been

drinking so that could explain part of it...

"When decorating your meal, make sure to arrange the onions in the shape of Peter Lorre's face. It's steak a la Ugarte!

"Garnish with small, inedible onions. WARNING! The carrots here are not to be eaten. Your manly meat-a-rifficness will diminish if you eat the carrots. Vegetables are for commies"
http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/meat/4.html

"“Blend in the vinegar, then the 7-up.” Together at last!"
http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/sevenup2/4.html

completely hysterical! i'm crying i'm laughing so hard!
thanks so much for this link!

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Response to orleans (Reply #26)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 10:59 AM

30. This site will give you hours of joy - pure snorting, crying with laughter joy.

You'll be happy to know there's much, much more...

http://www.lileks.com/institute/index.html

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Response to myrna minx (Reply #30)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 01:01 PM

33. omg! and then i found:

http://www.lileks.com/

he writes a column

http://www.startribune.com/bios/10645306.html

best stuff to read EVER!

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 05:08 PM

4. Have you seen the Gallery of Regrettable Food?

http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/



When decorating your meal, make sure to arrange the onions in the shape of Peter Lorre's face. It's steak a la Ugarte!

Garnish with small, inedible onions. WARNING! The carrots here are not to be eaten. Your manly meat-a-rifficness will diminish if you eat the carrots. Vegetables are for commies.

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Response to baldguy (Reply #4)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 11:01 AM

32. Lileks is one of the funniest writers around

He used to write a great political opinion column for Newhouse News Service some years ago.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 05:10 PM

5. The banana candle looks like something....

Very not safe for polite conversation...

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Response to TheMightyFavog (Reply #5)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 05:26 PM

6. Quite so

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Response to TheMightyFavog (Reply #5)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 05:40 PM

8. But just imagine the look on your date's face when you bite it! n/t

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Response to LadyHawkAZ (Reply #8)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 01:12 AM

23. Or if you swallow it whole, hands-free.

I'll probably get in trouble for that, but I had to say it

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Response to TheMightyFavog (Reply #5)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 05:38 AM

27. banana? i thought it was a corn cob with melted butter! (honestly)

god, it's like an ink blot test.....

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 05:37 PM

7. Spam and Lima bean casserole!

Who would have even thought to put those two things together??!!



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Response to riderinthestorm (Reply #7)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 06:02 PM

9. And what kind of nut expects a woman to arrange the lima beans in patterns?



Thank heaven I have better things to do with my time than line up lima beans.

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Response to riderinthestorm (Reply #7)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 11:26 PM

11. Just this:

Mystery meat and mush beans - YUK.

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Response to riderinthestorm (Reply #7)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 12:00 PM

16. You obviously never ate c-rations.

Pressed "ham" and lima beans.

And people complain about MREs.

-- Mal

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Thu Jan 9, 2014, 11:52 PM

12. Apparently back in the day

there was nothing that couldn't be done with lime jello, canned tuna, mayo, pimientos, and lard.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 12:04 AM

13. Does the super supper salad loaf have mayonnaise in it?

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Response to hibbing (Reply #13)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 10:28 AM

14. Looks like it

Some mess of stuff mixed with mayonnaise is stuffed into a hollowed-out hunk of bologna, as far as I can tell.

These ghastly recipes make me thankful that my mom was an immigrant who couldn't afford "women's" magazines and who stuck to basic meat and potatoes. I cannot picture her messing around with weird Jello salads back in the 50s and 60s.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 11:35 AM

15. I'm sure I've eaten a few of those Jello things

Probably just blocked from my mind.

I do remember, and still encounter it on occasion, lime Jello with cream cheese and pineapple. Which, to be honest, is not all that bad.

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Response to NV Whino (Reply #15)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 12:26 PM

17. My mother-in-law used to make a wonderful salmon mousse

with gelatin. I wish I had asked her for the recipe.

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Response to NV Whino (Reply #15)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 01:27 PM

18. My mom used to make the lime Jello salad.

I still like it. It's the only way I enjoy lime Jello. Haven't had it in years, though. Sometimes, she'd substitute a pint of vanilla ice cream for the cream cheese. Yummy!

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Response to GoCubsGo (Reply #18)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 01:52 PM

19. Ooo, the ice cream sounds good.

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Response to NV Whino (Reply #15)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 03:06 PM

20. Seafoam salad and it actually IS good. Not all jello recipes are bad. Tuna Jello pie is bad

Seafoam Salad is good. Especially made with ice cream!

http://allrecipes.com/recipe/sea-foam-salad/

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Response to NV Whino (Reply #15)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 01:23 AM

24. There's something "can-do"

about Jello and 1960's atomic age optimism.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Fri Jan 10, 2014, 11:30 PM

22. I'm going to let them slide on the baloney loaf

All the accompanying text makes it clear this is a World War II recipe.

Think of it like the eating of escargots in France, donkeys in China or haggis in Scotland: food was extremely short then; anything that could possibly provide nutrition wound up on the menu. And just as French people had to eat their snails when royalty in Dijon took everything else, Americans during World War II were often forced to eat their Republicans.

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Response to jmowreader (Reply #22)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 01:37 AM

25. I'm not going to let them slide.

Baloney is questionable but not appalling.

Mashed peas are questionable but not appalling.

Both together like that, and mixed with mayo? Appalling.

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Response to XemaSab (Reply #25)

Sun Jan 12, 2014, 02:02 AM

35. Think of it as a psychological support mechanism

During World War II we pretty much suspended life as we knew it in the United States so we'd have enough materiel to fight the war. Therefore, people went to a LOT of effort to try to instill a little normalcy in their lives.

Do something next time you're at the supermarket: Go to the ketchup aisle and get a bottle of Kitchen Bouquet. It's caramel coloring and a mixture of vegetable flavorings (it used to contain molasses, but they took it out) and today is used to make your insipid-looking attempt at gravy a bit more palatable. During World War II, women used to put it on their legs - so people would think they were wearing nylons, a product impossible to get because all the nylon was needed for the war effort. It gets better: the only way to truly mimic the effect of nylons was to draw a line up the back of each leg with an eyeliner pencil.

In the first half of the Twentieth Century, visiting was a popular pastime. Rather than texting your friend or talking with her on the phone, you actually went to her house. Dinner parties were also popular...and if the only thing your ration book would possibly allow you to serve to company was a cored-out loaf of bologna filled with a mashed pea-mayonnaise-fruit juice mixture, then by damn you would serve that disgusting menu to your guests, and they would like it.

I found out about the jello salad fad from back then, too: if you encapsulated your veggies in gelatin they would stay fresh days longer than if you didn't. This was the era when a refrigerator small enough to fit on the front of a trailer, but powerful enough to bring the inside of the trailer to 40 degrees, didn't exist...so you saw fresh vegetables at the store maybe twice a week during the summer and they had to last until the next batch arrived. They even had vegetable-flavored jello so you could do it right. During the winter you weren't so lucky...if you didn't have a garden's worth of vegetables canned to get you through the cold months, your family got to go on the "scurvy and pellagra" diet that was basically all-starches with a little meat sometimes.

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Response to jmowreader (Reply #35)

Sun Jan 12, 2014, 12:18 PM

40. That is really interesting about the gelatin

Baloney and peas is still hideous, though.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 09:58 AM

28. What was it about the 70s, jello moulds, and terrines...

?? I'm too young to have experienced it but it seems like an odd culinary fad. And while I'm at it can I have more amber coloured glasswork? I don't think the 70s had enough amber coloured glassware.

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Response to Locut0s (Reply #28)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 10:53 AM

29. Would you believe gas stations handed out free amber colored glassware in the early 70s?

When in college I remember buying gas for 25 cents a gallon at the (long gone) PathMark gas station on Route 27 in Somerset NJ, and getting a free glass beverage tumbler with each purchase.

Usually their glasses were avocado green, and I amassed quite a set of glassware this way. Sometimes the glassware was amber-colored, or what we called harvest gold at the time. I consider both colors hideous and no longer own any of those glasses. I've seen plenty of them in thrift shops if you feel you must have some.

The Jello molds were more of a 50s-60s thing than a 70s trend as far as I know. After WW2 the many women who had worked in factories to support the war effort lost their jobs, which were given to returning soldiers. To keep the women busy at home and out of the work force , they were encouraged to have lots of babies and spend all their spare time preparing elaborate meals, sewing, doing cute little crafts, having coffee-klatches and cocktail parties, etc.

It's no wonder to me that suburban women in my mother's age group went crazy from boredom.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Reply #29)

Sun Jan 12, 2014, 02:07 AM

36. I have often wondered...

If you go into a grandma kitchen, you will almost invariably find copper-coated jello molds hanging on the walls as decoration. I know my grandma when she was still alive, every house she ever lived in, the first thing she did when she got all her stuff inside was to open up the kitchen box and hang up the jello molds. It never failed: I helped that woman move into six different houses and every fucking time she got in, the jello molds went on the wall before the pots went in the drawer, the linens in the linen closet or the soap in the soap dish.

The question I have is, did anyone in the history of the world, who wasn't working as a food stylist at an advertising agency, ever put jello in these things more than once? A metal jello mold is a grade-A pain in the ass because the jello doesn't want to come out of them.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Reply #29)

Sun Jan 12, 2014, 03:53 AM

39. Lol indeed going into the local thrift shops...

They are jam packed with that type of glassware

Thanks for the correction on the period for the jello moulds.

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Response to Locut0s (Reply #28)

Sat Jan 11, 2014, 03:18 PM

34. You're thinking of the 1950s

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Response to jmowreader (Reply #34)

Sun Jan 12, 2014, 03:51 AM

38. Hmm, I guess your right...

At least on the jello stuff.

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Response to LiberalEsto (Original post)

Sun Jan 12, 2014, 03:49 AM

37. Every single picture

The first picture had me thinking, "That is the grossest thing I've ever seen." And then I scrolled down and thought it again 20 more times. I really couldn't pick the one that disturbed me the most.

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