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Sat Jan 26, 2013, 03:57 AM

Reliving my childhood. Pretty fucking amazing having a second chance at it!

I don't think I need to go into elaborate detail about why my life as a boy was Hell on earth -- the phrase "psycho gun toting abusive father who made life like living in a North Korean gulag" pretty much sums it up.

So, what does a 47 year old guy do after a major life crisis and emotional breakdown?

Well, in my case, I am doing a lot of things I never got to do the first time around. Yesterday morning before i had to go to work, even though I am absolutely awful at it, I was shooting baskets, well, attempting to shoot baskets, with a couple of guys at my gym. After I did my 10 laps and my fitness group.

You have no idea how much that made me feel like a kid again, in a very good way.

Some of the other things I am working on: Researching mountain bike models, so I can get a really great one in the spring. A guy from my gym wants me to do some XC/rough trail/single track with him and his buddies in the spring, and I am so there. The owner of local bike shop is going to take me out to a local park when the weather breaks on a demo bike and see what I've got and what I want to do so he can help me decide on a make and model. He also wants me to try out their demo Roubaix to see how I would enjoy speed/distance/endurance street riding. Again, I'm down with it. And, I am definitely taking swimming lessons and the military-level fitness class at my gym later this year.

Anybody with the desire to throw a baseball around in the spring, let me know, I'm your guy.

So, anyone else have a "reliving my childhood" in a good way story?

PS - this may be a rerun post for some of you, since I posted this elsewhere (low traffic forums).

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Reply Reliving my childhood. Pretty fucking amazing having a second chance at it! (Original post)
Denninmi Jan 2013 OP
Pretzel_Warrior Jan 2013 #1
Denninmi Jan 2013 #2
Pretzel_Warrior Jan 2013 #3
Denninmi Jan 2013 #4
MrScorpio Jan 2013 #5
Denninmi Jan 2013 #9
bluesbassman Jan 2013 #6
Denninmi Jan 2013 #11
nadine_mn Jan 2013 #7
Denninmi Jan 2013 #8
nadine_mn Jan 2013 #29
RILib Jan 2013 #19
nadine_mn Jan 2013 #30
Martin Eden Jan 2013 #10
Denninmi Jan 2013 #14
Martin Eden Jan 2013 #22
fasttense Jan 2013 #12
Denninmi Jan 2013 #16
Shankapotomus Jan 2013 #13
Denninmi Jan 2013 #15
Shankapotomus Jan 2013 #17
Denninmi Jan 2013 #20
In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #18
Denninmi Jan 2013 #21
pink-o Jan 2013 #23
Denninmi Jan 2013 #25
eppur_se_muova Jan 2013 #27
Denninmi Jan 2013 #28
Arugula Latte Jan 2013 #24
llmart Jan 2013 #26

Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 04:11 AM

1. I was not allowed to participate in team sports at school

 

so I was ecstatic to participate on a dragon boat team in 2010. I got to enjoy the highs and lows of working on a team in sport as we made our way through practices, team building, and competitions.

The best was in the final part of the season when we won gold at Victoria B.C. race and came in 3rd overall against 2 other unbelievable teams in Portland.

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Response to Pretzel_Warrior (Reply #1)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 04:22 AM

2. What's a dragon boat?

Tell me more - is it like rowing?

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Response to Denninmi (Reply #2)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 04:29 AM

3. opposite of rowing. like canoe paddling. 20 paddlers per boat. intense.

 

usually 500 meter races.

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Response to Pretzel_Warrior (Reply #3)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 04:34 AM

4. I can see the dragon head on the bow.

Neat photo.

It sounds like something that must have made you feel like a million bucks. Congrats on doing that.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 06:13 AM

5. Live, Bro. Live. nt

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Response to MrScorpio (Reply #5)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 07:35 AM

9. Thanks man.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 06:32 AM

6. Fantastic man! Keep it up.

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Response to bluesbassman (Reply #6)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 07:37 AM

11. You too, same response as to Mr. Scorpio.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 06:44 AM

7. I get it and I am doing too

I am a large woman who is not very coordinated who also sucked in gym class. I had an abusive family and as my therapist once said probably would have been better had I been raised by wolves. My husband was largely ignored by his parents. We don't have kids - we have fur babies and we embrace the whole 2nd childhood thing.

Early in the mornings, I sometimes go to the Y and shoot hoops - alone and I make my own swoosh noises. Sometimes my husband joins me and we play HORSE except he body checks me when I am winning, I have to explain that HORSE is not a contact sport.

My husband and I took a date night class at a local park and made clay bowls (you know the kind most kids make at camp - we were with 7 other couples, it was fun) and learned how to kick sled

I bought myself a goofy bear hat and bear mittens (I am 40 and look ridiculous but think its so cute)

At the same park with the date night, they had a drop in free art class where you could make prints with cut vegetables/fruits and paint - they provided all the supplies and paper. I was the only adult playing with the kids (it was for all ages and I did ask if adults could play too... I have no idea why the parents looked so bored and didn't make art prints with their kids - it was awesome)

I bought my husband a remote control helicopter-like toy - its not a helicopter ...its the word "FUCK" - so at work he can give a flying fuck. I also bought him a Kinex toy set so he can relieve his stress at work by building toys.

After nearly 40 yrs of being terrified of the deep end of the pool and not being able to swim, in 2011 I taught myself to swim (with my husband's very patient help) and now I am able to swim a half mile (and go in the deep end!).


We are laughing and enjoying life more and more everyday and loving it. Keep it up!!

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Response to nadine_mn (Reply #7)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 07:34 AM

8. Damn, don't get me wrong, I'm glad you have a great marriage, but ...

After reading your post, I sure wish you weren't married.

Got any single sisters by any chance?

Bravo to you, I love it!

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Response to Denninmi (Reply #8)

Mon Jan 28, 2013, 08:23 AM

29. Lol..thanks...fortunately for the world

My parents, despite a combined total of 9 marriages and divorces between them, never had another child.

I remember one winter after a fresh snowfall, going out into the yard to make snow angels and my husband looked at me like I was nuts...so I made him make one too (I mean business when it comes to snow angels).

I also invested in some super soaker water guns, on hot days when my husband is walking home from the bus stop I try to ambush him. I say try because my giggling usually gives me away...he now comes home prepared with a full water bottle to dump on me in self defense.

Toys are wasted on kids. If you haven't...get yourself a good water gun, and if you hear giggling for the bushes that may be me.

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Response to nadine_mn (Reply #7)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:34 AM

19. our library has neat kids programs

 

that they don't let adults into. They act like I'm demented or worse for wanting to see the baby animals that are brought in just for the kids.

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Response to RILib (Reply #19)

Mon Jan 28, 2013, 08:26 AM

30. Ugh don't get me started on "family" programs

That are just for kids. I hate it...why should kids get all the fun? We adults totally have earned the right to pet baby animals, play with paint or make crafts.

All kids do is make a mess and whine about wanting to play video games....lol. This is why I don't have kids, they would never get to play with their toys, lol.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 07:35 AM

10. I'm a Senior Softball player

I've played slowpitch softball since I was a kid, going to the local park for pickup games every day in the summer when it wasn't raining. Since 1980 I've played in park distruct leagues, 3-4 nights per week and Sundays for many years. Still do it 2-3 nights, including a 40+ league and one against the "kids" (guys in their 20's & 30's). A couple of my older mates got me into Senior Softball in 2007, the year I turned 50. We play weekend tournaments all over the Midwest, and sometimes Florida in the winter. We're a Chicago area club, with 50's, 55's, & 60's teams. 2013 will be my 2nd year in the 55's.

For us diehard softball players, in some ways our first childhood never really ended.

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Response to Martin Eden (Reply #10)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 09:57 AM

14. Dude, when can I join your league?

I mean, hey, Detroit is only 5 hours away from Chitown on I-94.

I would suck at least at first, but I'd give it everything I've got.

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Response to Denninmi (Reply #14)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 11:41 AM

22. Senior Softball is Nation-Wide

To be on my team you'd have to live in a state bordering Illinois, and unfortunately Michigan doesn't (maritime border in Lake Michigan doesn't count). There are plenty of teams in Michigan. You also have to be 50 or older before Dec 31 this year.

To find out more about Senior Softball, here's the link:
http://seniorsoftball.com/

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 07:50 AM

12. Shhhhh don't tell anyone but

I'm really reliving my childhood as a farmer. My parents tried but they just couldn't figure me out and most talks with them as a child ended in me receiving a beating. It was the only way they knew to keep me in line. There were so many things I was NOT suppose to do or say, that I ended up getting a beating at least once a week.

But now I can.......

Experiment with mushrooms and see how they grow best. Something that got me one of my worse beating when I tried growing mushrooms in the basement at 8.

I get to play with chickens. I've trained them to come when I call, to perch on my arm, and they let me stroke them for treats. Though my parents had chickens I was never allowed to train or play with them. Their roosters were so mean, you had to protect yourself with a big stick in order to collect the eggs. But my roosters cluck happily like little chicks when I come to feed them. And the dogs never chase the chickens, they know those chickens are mine. But my brave puppies do chase off raccoons, foxes and even hawks that are eying up the flock.

I've got sheep eating out of my hand and greeting me at the gate.

I get to garden all the time. Not just weed which was all my parents let me do. But I get to plan and plant and harvest and dig in the dirt all I want. It's a lot of work and there are dirty, nasty chores usually involving animal manures and doctoring sick livestock, and the money isn't much but....

I get to be outside peacefully, with contented animals and the beauty of the land and nature surrounding me.

But don't tell anyone else, farming is suppose to be hard work with very little reward. Shhhhh

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Response to fasttense (Reply #12)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:05 AM

16. Very nice.

I have a big yard, a lot of gardens, beds, borders. Bees. I had poultry, waterfowl, and a few game birds until my crisis, I got rid of them unfortunately. I have a lot of fruit trees, berries, grapes and kiwis, etc.

I have grown shiitake, oysters, stropharia, and shaggy manes from Fungi Perfecti kits.

I know it's a hard way to make a living, but the intangibles are incredible.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 09:56 AM

13. I've had the reverse struggle

Last edited Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:29 AM - Edit history (1)

being the youngest, my family has had a zombie-like determination to keep me a "kid". It has its frustrations but I can't claim a parent caring "too much" comes close to the pain of a parent not caring at all. If it's any consolation, in some ways, a bad parent makes it easier to break free of the nest, though I don't know your specific circumstances.

Glad you're finally getting to experience "childhood' in a good way.



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Response to Shankapotomus (Reply #13)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:01 AM

15. That is one sweet ride.

Electric, how cool. I better forget that link ASAP, or I'll want one of those, too. I'm apparently into big boy toys these days.

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Response to Denninmi (Reply #15)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:29 AM

17. link removed ;) n/t

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Response to Shankapotomus (Reply #17)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:43 AM

20. Ah, thanks!

Too slow, I bookmarked it. Ok, not really!

That is an awesome bike, hope you can get one for yourself.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:30 AM

18. I won't even try to remember my childhood.

I like finding the inner child in me today, she needs a bit of tenderness and nuturing.

Like you, I enjoy finding pleasure in life's simple things.

I'm not into team sports so tossing a baseball hasn't worked for me
since I was 11, when a ball clipped my ear. Damn. That really hurt.

How about if we go fly kites together instead?

PS: If you want to know about mountain bikes . . . get in touch with taterguy.
He's the man.










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Response to In_The_Wind (Reply #18)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:44 AM

21. Yeah, I used to like kites as a kid.

I could do that.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 11:56 AM

23. I had a great childhood...

I'm 11 years older than you, so I grew up in the sixties in one of those neighborhoods right out of a bucolic cliche. The kids all got together, rode bikes, played tag and hide n seek, baseball, street hockey, slid down hills in cardboard boxes, went to the fair--yeah, exactly like you're imagining it. I was always the tallest and the strongest, and when we were kids it didn't matter that I was a girl.

So what's the worst thing that can happen to a happy child? Adolescence.

I won't go into the horrors of 1960s girl intimates, but suffice to say there were no sports bras or Lycra. Jumping rope ended. Parallel bars and tumbling became no more, and running and swimming on certain days was impossible. Adults could never get me to sit still, but the Iron Maiden of bad underthings did the job. And the social disapproval was the final nail: it's cute for a girl to be a tomboy, but now suddenly I had to be a "Young Lady"

I spent a long time denying my athletic self, was overweight and unhappy. Got it together at 37, and finally, after menopause, have come full circle. It's like I met my 11 year old self on the beach, and she rolled her eyes at me and said: "So here you are. What took you so long?"

Then we ran off, grabbed our bikes and picked up right where we left off.

Proving, once again that even if growing old is inevitable, growing up is a choice.


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Response to pink-o (Reply #23)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 01:19 PM

25. This is the best part of everything you wrote, which is all great!

It's like I met my 11 year old self on the beach, and she rolled her eyes at me and said: "So here you are. What took you so long?"

Then we ran off, grabbed our bikes and picked up right where we left off.


I kind of feel that way. I remember knowing at 5 that my father was profoundly fucked up in the head, and knowing that it meant life was not right.

So, I guess I am resetting to 5 in some ways.

I'll be fine as long as I don't eat the paste and crayons.

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Response to Denninmi (Reply #25)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:16 PM

27. Have you Googled "edible crayons" lately ? :^) nt

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Response to eppur_se_muova (Reply #27)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 10:26 PM

28. Do I want to?

Edible crayons, who knew?

Be afraid, be very afraid.

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Response to Denninmi (Original post)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 12:41 PM

24. That was a great thing about having kids ...

I got to go trick-or-treating again, I got to play "Candyland" and "Hi Ho Cherry-o," I got to play in the snow and make snowmen, I got to make indoor forts, and so on and so forth.

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #24)

Sat Jan 26, 2013, 09:54 PM

26. I agree with you on that one....

Sometimes I think I had kids just so I could have a childhood again.

Circumstances beyond my control made me grow up way too soon.

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