My sister's grandkid: are all kids like this?

[raccoon]

She's 5. Goes with Grandma, great-aunt, and mom to an ice cream parlor, just a regular one.

Mom has a glass of water, tells Kid she can't have her own.

Kid whines and finally gets it. BTW, she doesn't touch it.

[Turbineguy]

1. Yes

in the contest of wills.

[raccoon]

3. My fellow boomers, do you think for one minute we'd have gotten that glass of water?

That's assuming we were fortunate enough to go to the ice cream parlor in the first place.

[elleng]

5. Yes, but Mom or Dad would have provided it initially.

[The empressof all]

8. Of course I would have gotten my own water at age 5

No way would any child at our family table be deprived of a glass of water.

I'm sorry but I find this water witholding issue here kind of odd. Were they concerned she couldn't control her bladder? Weren't their restrooms at the restaurant/

I just don't understand why, why, why this poor child couldn't have something available to drink without being required to humiliate herself by whining for it.

[loli phabay]

16. im with you on this, why wouldnt you give a 5 year ols a glass of water

I could understand if it was a beer or coffee or something else,

[The empressof all]

2. Why couldn't she have a glass of water?

She was at the table. I'm assuming others at the table had water. I know when I'm at a restaurant I like having water available to me during my meal...Who cares if I drink it.

When you withhold something reasonable from anyone it makes them a little pissy. Imagine if you were in a restaurant and the people you were with told you You couldn't have a glass of water.

It was just a friggen glass of water for god's sake.

Now I'm upset for this poor kid....

[raccoon]

4. No, only her mom had a glass of water. nt

[elleng]

6. Right, absolutely,

AND Dad ALWAYS had water with meals; not that important to Mom. Now I'm NEVER without a glass of water.

And absolutely right, when something reasonable is withheld, pissyness is likely to follow, or at least recognition that something's wrong here.

[cyberswede]

7. All kids try whining. Those who get their way will do it again and again.

It's up to the adult to teach the kid that whining is NOT going to get them what they want.

[Chan790]

9. Yes.

Next time don't deny the kid something as easy and reasonable as a glass of water.

[seabeyond]

10. nope. kids never got anything with a whine. a whine coming

after i told them no.... and this was an IF it came cause they seldom did it, i would tell them fine, we leave. that simple.

neither of my kids were whiners. i picked the battle. that is the big one. if it wasnt a big deal, i allowed. then there is not a battle and they are not always hearing no. but, i never rewarded the whine. ever. or tantrum. ever.

[Xyzse]

11. Always get them their own glass

I don't know.
For my niece and nephews I always get them their own glass.

Reason being is that they do say that bacteria from the mouth of adults can damage kids teeth particularly for the future.

It is far more hygeniec to do so any way.

I mean, they are cute, and try to share their sippy cups/glass with me at some points but I always have to just make a show of imbibing rather than actually doing so.
--
However, I think you are wondering about how kids are basically influenced mostly by their Id. If so, that is usually the case, they tend to see things towards their wants and are limited in looking beyond that too much. I see that as a teachable moment.

[mnhtnbb]

12. Why is mom so withholding? Kid wants to be separate--grown up--and mom says no. So kid

behaves accordingly--whine to get it--and mom collapses.

Seems to me that mom set the kid up.

What's the problem with letting the child have her own glass of water right from the start?

[lunatica]

13. Yes. Don't you want something when they tell you you can't have it?

[pipi_k]

14. Well....

yeah, pretty much they are, but...

As a mom and grandma, I have to say this...

You want to pick your "fights" with your kids, and when you do say no, you don't want to lose.

Especially when you give in after the kid whines. Because then the child knows that will get him what he wants.

I just wonder why the mom didn't let her daughter have a glass of water in the first place. It's better than saying no, then giving in when the whining starts.

That's how kids get turned into brats, and then give all the well behaved kids a bad name. That's how kids end up being banned from restaurants, etc.

[frogmarch]

15. 5-year-olds are people too.

She should have been given a glass of water in the first place, just like everyone else at the table was.