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Sat Jan 12, 2013, 12:30 PM

Steubenville Football & Rape Culture

Trigger warning.

20 replies, 2944 views

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Arrow 20 replies Author Time Post
Reply Steubenville Football & Rape Culture (Original post)
redqueen Jan 2013 OP
They_Live Jan 2013 #1
redqueen Jan 2013 #3
They_Live Jan 2013 #5
tavalon Jan 2013 #18
seabeyond Jan 2013 #2
redqueen Jan 2013 #4
seabeyond Jan 2013 #6
tavalon Jan 2013 #19
deutsey Jan 2013 #17
Kalidurga Jan 2013 #7
redqueen Jan 2013 #8
Kalidurga Jan 2013 #9
freshwest Jan 2013 #11
seabeyond Jan 2013 #12
seabeyond Jan 2013 #10
SunSeeker Jan 2013 #13
freshwest Jan 2013 #14
radicalliberal Jan 2013 #15
freshwest Jan 2013 #16
redgreenandblue Jan 2013 #20

Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 12:41 PM

1. huh?

what does "trigger warning" mean?

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Response to They_Live (Reply #1)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 12:45 PM

3. It means there are graphic descriptions which could trigger PTSD reactions

in rape victims.

It's an awful thing to experience, so anyone who posts anything which could trigger those reactions in others should warn other victims of the possibly triggering content.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #3)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 12:53 PM

5. Thank You.

Now I know.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #3)

Sun Jan 13, 2013, 05:44 AM

18. Yeah, overall, I think this has allowed places like DU to learn appropriate behaviors and norms

Yeah, there have been idiotic posts but overall, I find that people here have been considerate and thoughtful around this heinous crime and have been willing to learn about rape and the myths surrounding it.

Being careful about triggers is one example of that.

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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 12:42 PM

2. love this man. from my perspective, he hit on all the points so well. nt

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Response to seabeyond (Reply #2)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 12:46 PM

4. I fucking LOVE that he called out rape apologists who claim that "sometimes no means yes"...

anyone who does that should be shunned.

Pathetic that we see it here, and hardly anyone says shit about it... but that's rape culture for you!

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Response to redqueen (Reply #4)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 01:01 PM

6. yes, that. but also that he flipped it to, and abstinence is not the answer either

it seems if one goes one direction, they are accused of promoting the other extreme. he nipped that in the ass

but yes, the no means yes, really cause some stupid ass study taken in the most shallow of ways says, that some girls at one time in their life said no, but really wanted it. ergo.... girls fantasy to be raped. what a fuckin conclusion that is.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #4)

Sun Jan 13, 2013, 05:45 AM

19. Shunned and shamed

Public shaming has taken a whole new level with social media. I hate it when it's stupid but this is, IMO, very appropriate shaming.

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Response to seabeyond (Reply #2)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 07:30 PM

17. I really liked this guy, too

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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 01:23 PM

7. Just one correction...

The girl was drugged. And that puts a whole nutter level of outrage on the incident. But, there are plenty of instances where women do get drunk and raped so, he did a good job of addressing that issue even if it wasn't the issue in this instance.

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Response to Kalidurga (Reply #7)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 01:38 PM

8. Yeah I noticed that mistake too...

I'm glad he didn't mention it though, cause it's too easy for that to play into society's willingness to side with women who are incapacitated against their will, but not those who do simply overindulge... because... 'well... you know... those kinds of girls/women actually do ask for it/deserve it, really.'

The whole 'stranger rape' gets sympathy while 'date rape' gets told she just regrets it the next day, she brought it on herself, she this/that/the other thing, *anything*, to blame her for her rapist's actions.

Bleargh.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #8)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 01:44 PM

9. Yeah I didn't think it was a glaring mistake...

and I agree with your point. It wouldn't matter if she got incapacitated by drinking too much or because they did drug her, it's still rape and everything they did would be just as horrific. But, it does make what they did more criminal IMNSHO and that should be added to the charges of rape. In fact even if all they did was drug her it would be a crime. IMNSHO. Or if they drugged her and put clown make up on her and posted on facebook or something like that, its a crime to drug people and do things to them that they can't consent to.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #8)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 04:08 PM

11. The intention of both scenarios is to take sexual advantage of someone unable to give consent...

There was a rhyme guys joked about:

Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.

There is an intent to bribe or otherwise overcome the reasoning of the 'date' to do something not in their best interest - which the person doing the giving knows. And whether it is candy, liquor or a meal - the giver expects sex in return for being so 'generous.'

This has been going on for so long, it's accepted, but it's not funny to be on the receiving end of the coercion. It's sad how many have decided a woman should offer her body for the price of a meal.

Which is what women over the world have been reduced to doing - but we're supposed to be civilized... Some argue that's why there's no such thing as rape in a marriage or with a prostitute. After all, they are 'getting paid,' huh?

It's why 'dutch treat' is my motto, just to eliminate any misunderstanding.

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Response to freshwest (Reply #11)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 04:22 PM

12. a woman should offer her body for the price of a meal.

incredibly sad. not to mention the number of men that do it and then bitch about HAVING to pay for a womans meal.

i am like you. dutch treat was mine too. and never had an easy go of it either. had to reduce it to, if you want to go on a date, i pay my portion.

but, yes, you are right on with your post.

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Response to Kalidurga (Reply #7)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 01:50 PM

10. caught it also. and seems like most all over the rapist ass are at too much drinking.

not drugged and not remembering shit an hour into being at the first house.

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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 04:57 PM

13. K&R

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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 06:00 PM

14. Excellent video, cool young man. Thanks for posting.

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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 06:21 PM

15. Something I frequently heard as I was growing up in Texas: "Football builds character!"

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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sat Jan 12, 2013, 06:30 PM

16. Here is the article he cites and another detailing harrassment:

An Incomplete Guide to Not Creeping
August 9, 2012 By John Scalzi

http://whatever.scalzi.com/2012/08/09/an-incomplete-guide-to-not-creeping/

Witnessing harassment at Worldcon

Posted on September 3, 2012 by Sigrid Ellis

http://sigridellis.wordpress.com/2012/09/03/witnessing-harassment-at-worldcon/


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Response to redqueen (Original post)

Sun Jan 13, 2013, 07:42 AM

20. There is one point that I would have phrased differently:

People generally have the right to be left alone if they desire it, but in my opinion, in particular in the context of high-school culture, a person who will dislike (I mean a general form of antipathy, not absence of sexual attraction) another person regardless of the personality of the other person is probably in the wrong.

Therefore, I think the part about "you are not entitled to be liked" I would have phrased as "in order to not come across as creepy, don't waste your time trying to gain the approval of arrogant assholes". Achieves the same thing but puts a stronger emphasis on the fact that you are not to blame for being disliked.

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