Thu Aug 9, 2012, 07:27 PM
me b zola (18,878 posts)
4 replies, 1161 views
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Adoption & Truth (Original post)
|me b zola||Aug 2012||OP|
|me b zola||Aug 2012||#2|
Response to me b zola (Original post)
Fri Aug 10, 2012, 09:13 AM
southernyankeebelle (11,304 posts)
4. I hope and pray that if she finds them she won't be disappointed. I say really careful what
you wish for. My husband came from Germany. He was adopted by older american couple stationed in Germany. My husband was 4 yrs old when he was brought here. I won't go into the whole way we found her but we did. We found some of the German family. We found out his mother's sister lived in Canada and his mother ended up marrying an american and moved here to the states. I should have realized by how they said they wanted to protect his mother from being hurt with their reunion. None of them seemed to worry how he felt. Well in the end we did meet her. He talked with her on the phone. When her husband died we went to the funeral. I actually liked the husband very much. I was on guard with her. She had another son after my husband. His brother was interracial child and was a nice guy. The problem was she kept comparing the boys together. She kinda put a wall up between them. His life wasn't as stable as my husband. My husband wanted to be friends with his brother but the resentment he had grew and we blamed his mother. Finally one day he told us that his father that died wasn't he natural father either. So we went back home and he would call her every now and then. You never knew if she was being honest. My husband would want to talk with his brother and he was never there always in school. This went on for a very long time. We figured it out that he must be in jail because she wouldn't give us his address. Then some other issues happened and finally we just cut it off. That family is crazy. I felt really bad for my husband.
All I tell you to remember if you look for a parent there is a reason they gave you up. If you get to talk with them find out the health questions but just be careful the reunion doesn't come back to bite you in the butt especially if you have children.