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Tue Mar 5, 2013, 09:25 AM

Conservative Group: Geico Pig is Bestiality



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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 09:57 AM

1. This is the kind of thing you would expect mentioned at a high class cocktail party....

Just before the pie fight....

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 10:00 AM

2. I'm content to sit back

and not defend either side in this battle of intellects.

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Response to Shankapotomus (Reply #2)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 10:55 AM

5. Oh, there's only one side.

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Response to Iggo (Reply #5)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 11:06 AM

8. As for the pig haters

... we can't exactly have a battle of wits with the unarmed, can we?

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 10:26 AM

3. With all the problems in our country,

they're worried about a friggin' PIG?!

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 10:39 AM

4. How dare they!

I'm a big Geico pig fan.

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Response to zanana1 (Reply #4)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 11:37 AM

11. I hate the pig, but the fundies are ridiculous

I look at that pig and think "pork chops". But I guess my mind is cleaner than that of the average Fundagelical loon.

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 10:56 AM

6. if they really believe that, then they must really have a subconscious bestialtiy problem. They

really need professional help

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 11:00 AM

7. STOP THE INSANITY!!!

Followed to its logical (?) conclusion, this would make almost everyone in America guilty of so-called - gag! - bestiality.

What will 1M (hahahaha) Moms want us to do next? Kill all those satanic cats and dogs most of us have? This is worse than wanting to do away with Big Bird, it's dragging his reputation through the mud while they're at it. Leave them go long enough and they'll start insisting that mothers stop cuddling and God-forbid KISSING their little boys because they'll say it promotes incest. I don't even want to think about the warnings we can expect regarding dads kissing their little girls.

This bunch of crazy idiots have all gone off their collective rocker for sure now, and I'll bet it was a short jump.

So for the record, I want to say here and now that I LOVE THE PIG! Only his commercial connection is regrettable, and it's probably not his choice in the first place so why blame him even for that??? Shoving Wall Street as far away as possible, to me he represents freedom and innocence. The very best shows him passing a human on a zip line or ski lift, squealing his sweet little lungs out, and midway there's a pause where he intones, "Pure adrenalin!" and then resumes his joyous squeal as he forges ahead. Who doesn't love that? As something of an adrenalin junkie myself, I take him as downright exemplary.

Now excuse me, I have to go and feed and cuddle AND KISS my little mini-Beagle/Pom dog I named Molly Maguire so she could be Irish too. What does that make ME, you hateful bunch of idiots? Far worse, for 16 years I was blessed with two big red chow dogs who were the most faithful, loving companions and guardians a person could want. One held nightly conferences with me where she'd stand and bark socially for several minutes before bedtime. I don't really know whether she was telling on her sister or what, but it happened every night like clockwork as soon as I said "Let's turn in now, baby girls." I couldn't leave a landline phone anywhere in reach of the alpha because she'd knock off the receiver and stand there barking at it, probably wondering why nobody answered. Is it my fault humans don't speak canine? Whatever she was trying to convey, I'm sure it made more sense than any conservative on earth.

When they eventually had to be put down because their progressive paralysis left them hardly able to walk even when I lifted those 70-lb dogs up front and back, it nearly killed me. They're both buried out back in my yard, together in death as they were in life, and for a long time I wished I were sleeping there with them. Even now it's taken me half an hour to get through this paragraph.

I know it's wrong to hate people, but I damn sure hate the sorry state of their souls if they have any to be concerned for in the first place. Some DU'ers might want to laugh off this conservative nightmare, but I'm telling you it's symptomatic of total rot. If I could reach out and touch one of those sociopaths right now, I'd slap her sillier than she already is.

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 11:19 AM

9. What woman hasn't been on a date with a pig?

I'll let them call it beastiality for every time a gal is out with a TALKING PIG!

There is just so much stupid in America!

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 11:25 AM

10. Puppet coitus is not an issue to be taken lightly...

We all know what horny little buggers those puppets are...

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 01:35 PM

12. Wait. What?

Wow... just, wow. More like a million (or 54 thousand, as the case may be) STUPID moms.

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 02:53 PM

13. I though it was a little gross when I first saw it.

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 03:55 PM

14. The Onion is getting major competition from the political rightwing

The only difference is.......the wingnuts don't know they're comics!!!!!

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 04:49 PM

15. Conservatives are just obsessed with sex

they see it everywhere in the most unexpected places and things - they really have a huge problem. May be Boehner and McTurtle can arrange for counseling to be inserted into the Affordable Care Act.

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Response to Smilo (Reply #15)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 05:38 PM

16. If they do insert it into the Affordable Care Act, I hope they insert it slow and very deep.

 

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 06:08 PM

17. Not a benchmark

This is about half a peg down from when Jerry Falwell called Tinky Winky, the Teletubby, gay.

The bar on conservative / fundamentalist asshattery is pretty damn high. If the 0.054 Million Moms want to be taken seriously, they’ll better exercise their moribund brain cells

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 07:33 PM

18. NO, What's Bestiality IS..........

The way these same complainers devour these same animals at their annual "PIG JIGS" and "WEE WEE WEE" BBQ's.

It's like watching piranhas kiss.

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 08:10 PM

19. The regions where these

"million Moms" tend to come from are the same places that as late a a few years ago banned gay marriage, but continued to allow bestiality as legal. And somehow I think they don't even realize it.

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Response to celtics23 (Original post)

Tue Mar 5, 2013, 08:51 PM

20. LOL But what the heck, I give the conservatives this one. He is on a date in one of the ads.

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