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Sun Feb 10, 2013, 04:47 AM

The Garden of Eden was America? So say the Mormons & ...

Mormon founder Joseph Smith established a settlement in Daviess County, Missouri, and taught that the Garden of Eden was somewhere in that area.

Well, a Democratic in 2013 can suppose too....

Perhaps in the year 1776, God looked down on the world and said, " I need
a new Garden of Eden"...So, God made America.

And then God said, " I need a country where knowledge isn't confined to a tree
and everyone is invited to take a bite from the apple without being
afraid of being bitten by a snake or a vampire from one of the latest
Twilight Movies"...So, God made America.

"I need a country where all men will treat women as equals and not as
if I made them from spare parts. Where all white men will realize that
all other men are not there to work in The Garden on their behalf.
Where The Garden will not only be open to those who got their first,
but to all those who can contribute to the greater good for all. And the
only time they will be forced to leave is when they are coming back for
the final time to see me"...So, God made America.

God then said, " I need a country where priests, TV Evangelists and Hare
Krishnas, are not handling my public relations. Where religions are
committed to spreading my word and not their will, and the only time
I see a Religious Leader on his knees and his lips moving, is to say a
prayer"...So, God made America.

"I need a country that will protect the Garden and not poison it. If I
wanted a polar bear to be on that thin of ice, I would have made him
a pelican. I need a country that wants its children to be thinner than
its atmosphere and knows that carbon dioxide is something you breathe
out, not a plague on the way in!...So, God made America.

God wants a country that is strong enough to protect and gentle enough
to reflect on the changing kindness and callousness that will cause so
much unrest. God said that he had to have a country that, "depended
more on doctors and science instead of manna and miracles. A country
that didn't spend so much time worshiping me, but appreciates how much
I believe in them"...So, God made America.

God looked around at what he created and said, "this Garden of Eden won't
perish by his hand. Not by temptation, information, or self-realization, but only
by our lack of faith that we are already there. Honor it, cherish it and always remember
that God does bless it...So, God made America!

http://www.politicalpizza.net/2013/02/the-garden-of-eden-was-america-so-say.html

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Reply The Garden of Eden was America? So say the Mormons & ... (Original post)
PoliticalPizza Feb 2013 OP
Catherina Feb 2013 #1
Democrats_win Feb 2013 #2
libodem Feb 2013 #3
libodem Feb 2013 #4

Response to PoliticalPizza (Original post)

Sun Feb 10, 2013, 09:53 AM

1. I didn't think it possible but they've outdone themselves n/t

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Response to PoliticalPizza (Original post)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 02:12 PM

2. According to Wikipedia, it's true!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Garden_of_Eden

Members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (also known as the Mormons or Latter-day Saints) believe that the Garden of Eden was located in present-day Jackson County, Missouri

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The rest of the wikipedia article discusses where the BIBLE says the Garden of Eden is. Oh those Mormons, always changing the Bible!

Of course the article in the OP is all about pointing out the fun of the whole thing.

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Response to Democrats_win (Reply #2)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 03:24 PM

3. They also call native Americans

Lamanites, and consider them a lost tribe. I think the belief is something like the Biblical mid-easterners, wove submarines out of basket material and traveled to The Americas from under the ocean.


I believe DNA studies have completely deconstucted this doctrine.

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Response to PoliticalPizza (Original post)

Mon Feb 11, 2013, 03:32 PM

4. Pretty sure they still

Believe that Jesus, Himself visited and converted these Lamanites, during the three days, before rising. The faithful often adopt and convert Native children, if they can get their hands on them.

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