Best teacher comment about a student's paper ever!

[Are_grits_groceries]

Bwahahaha!

[yeoman6987]

1. Fake

No way a student has their teacher as a friend.

[DamnYankeeInHouston]

3. I am a teacher and a friend to many students and their families, mostly past, some present.

[yeoman6987]

5. Wow! Kinda surprised with present

I am all for past but just didn't think students would want their teachers to know what they are up to until later. Maybe it's real.

[gcomeau]

13. Specifically... a *Facebook* friend?

Not saying it's impossible, but would be really very unusual.

[1monster]

31. Our school district tells us NOT to have any social media contact with any student

attending district school, not just the schools we teach in...

It is for the safety of the students, the district employees, and the school district. Former students are okay. Current students, not okay.

[LWolf]

14. I don't friend my students,

although I'm always asked to. I like to keep my private life private.

My district, and my school, have fb pages. I can, if I want, create a professional fb identity to interact with them. I haven't, but many teachers have.

[WillowTree]

2. Way to crush a kid's spirit, if true.

[DamnYankeeInHouston]

4. I agree - very mean.

[tkmorris]

6. Sometimes the naked truth is what's called for

Without having seen this kid's paper I cannot say if this was such a circumstance.

[pnwmom]

11. No, what is always called for are comments that are helpful. Spewing comical insults,

no matter how well deserved, will not help the student improve his or her writing.

[WillowTree]

21. Fine. Then the teacher should be professional about it.

Snide rhetoric and hyperbole are completely out of place in this venue (school).

[11 Bravo]

32. I vehemently disagree. I have been a teacher for ...

almost 40 years, and I neither I, nor to my knowledge, any of my colleagues ever penned anything as demeaning or dismissive toward a student placed in our charge.
If this is not faked, then that teacher should feel ashamed.

[PatrickforO]

7. Yeah, that's over the top. Would have been better with the, 'I know you can do better' approach. n/t

[tblue]

9. Is that a teacher or a critic?

It's showing off, and rude.

[Hekate]

12. Plagiarism from the Internet is a huge problem these days. Teacher might suspect that. Also....

I started college in 1965, and some of my professors could be memorably sarcastic. My favorite classroom statement from Prof. Sharp was: "Simple minds, simple answers."

I think this kid's spirit will survive.

[uponit7771]

19. +1, not constructive at all

[jeff47]

23. Depends on the "kid's" age and history.

If the "kid" is older, like end of High School or in College, then there's less reason to be delicate. They should have learned how to write a coherent paper by the time they're at that late stage.

Also, if there's a history of the teacher trying to be delicate and supportive and the kid just isn't getting it, then it might be time to be more direct to get their attention.

[WillowTree]

24. There's a huge difference between "delicate" and being snide and condescending.

I would not have had much respect for any teacher that I had in high school who responded to a legitimate question that way. This isn't constructive criticism, nor is it indicative of someone who wants to instruct, but rather of someone who is looking to make the reader feel small and stupid.

And, by the way, if the paper was really that bad, then the teacher must have done a pretty pittiful job of explaining his/her expectations for the report. Especially since the student's question itself would seem to indicate that the kid is interested in doing well, or at least better, and isn't just blowing the poor grade off.

[jeff47]

25. And my point is it may not be a legitimate question.

We don't have the history of questions this student has asked and the teacher has answered. It could very well be that the approach you support was taken dozens of times before this interaction.

Heck, we don't know if this was actually sent to the student or was a "What I wanted to say was...." post.

[WillowTree]

30. Whether things were presented to a kid in a more professional manner or not.......

........it is highly unlikely that such sneering, self-satisfied rhetoric is going to result in any improvement.

[awoke_in_2003]

27. It isn't...

I don't think any teacher would say something like this privately to their student, let alone publicly. There is zero constructive criticism there, it is all insult.

[jmowreader]

8. Sounds like a college teacher, not a high school one

[pnwmom]

10. I give the teacher an F. The teacher failed to provide any useful feedback, which is

a teacher's job. This is just a humorously written hit-piece.

No student would know how to improve his or her work based on this.

[GreatGazoo]

17. +1 assuming this is not fake (a big assumption) the teacher failed to provide

useful feedback, opting instead to showcase their colorful metaphors.

[malaise]

15. Bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah hahahahahahahha

Perfect

[alcibiades_mystery]

16. Grading the Teacher's Writing

A Few Comments on Your Research Paper Response

"In fact, the sentences...seemed to be placed there against their will."

The seeming was a fact? "In fact" clearly serves as an intensifier here, but it is confusing, given that what follows is not really a "fact" as we (or the reader) would generally understand it. The general problem with this sentence is what's called a slow wind-up. Between the subject ("the sentences&quot and the main verb ("seemed&quot you've placed a 20 word (!) restrictive clause. It makes the sentence more confusing - even to the writer! Indeed, the content of the restrictive clause is merely apparent ("apparently&quot while the content of the main clause is clearly apparent ("clearly seemed&quot !

"...interacting at a cocktail party..."

A "cocktail party?" This is not the best metaphor to be addressed to a student in 2015. Perhaps it would work for a prep school student in 1963. It's an archaic metaphor for interaction relative to the audience; people don't really go to "cocktail parties" anymore, even with the cocktail culture resurgence. In any case, who kidnaps people and forces them to go to a cocktail party? If you're going to use the kidnapping metaphor in sentence 3 and the hostage situation metaphor as your forceful close in sentence 6, you shouldn't interrupt those with the cocktail party metaphor in sentence 4. Rather, the cocktail party should be switched out for something a) more relevant to the reader and b) more consistent with the surrounding tropes in sentences 3 and 6.

Overall, a good start, and we get your point. But... Lack of audience-focus. Poor transitions. Bizarre mixed metaphors. Clunky sentences. I would also caution you on your lack of grace here, but we should focus on improving your actual writing before we deal with issues of ethos. B-

[ecstatic]

18. I find that response rather disgusting

Based on the response, I'm guessing the student didn't organize the paper properly. If the course topic was not English or literature, she probably felt it wasn't her job to help him, but she could have at least offered more constructive guidance--perhaps a link to a site the student could visit to get on track.

The problem is, many students aren't taught this in school. I had a friend who made it to college without knowing the minimum requirements for a coherent essay/ paper (intro with thesis, paragraphs supporting the thesis, conclusion). Once I taught him the basic formula, he was competent enough to pass georgia's regents exam (which really isn't saying much, and I think that exam has been discontinued due to so many college students failing it, smh).

[Brickbat]

20. This thread is even funnier than the graphic.

[Lizzie Poppet]

26. Yep.

I could easily see myself writing something like that. And sure, that probably means it's a good thing I don't use my PhD to teach...but it's still funny.

[yellowcanine]

22. crappy teacher who doesn't use constructive criticism.

Sarcasm and ridicule is no substitute for a well reasoned critique. The guide for the teacher should be, "How can I improve this student's ability to write a good paper?" This might get guffaws at a cocktail party but it doesn't help students. The teacher seems to have failed as a stand up comedian and now is taking it out on his students.

[bigwillq]

28. If this is real, teacher needs to go.

Not a very good way to motivate a student, imo.