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Sun Apr 15, 2012, 11:55 PM

Really Newsweek?

Jesus H Christ on a popsicle stick


In an age where women are dominating - in the workplace, at school, at home - why are they seeking to be dominated in their love lives? Recent media portrayals have shown that a rising number of modern women fantasize about being overpowered, while studies are turning out statistics that bewilder feminists. New shows like HBO’sGirls and books like Fifty Shades of Grey are showcasing the often hidden desire for powerlessness. But why? Katie Roiphe examines the submissive yet empowered female in Newsweek. “It is perhaps inconvenient for feminism that the erotic imagination does not submit to politics, or even changing demographics,” she writes.

http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2012/04/submission-rules.html

91 replies, 6602 views

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Arrow 91 replies Author Time Post
Reply Really Newsweek? (Original post)
kpete Apr 2012 OP
chollybocker Apr 2012 #1
steve2470 Apr 2012 #2
Lionessa Apr 2012 #3
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #12
Lionessa Apr 2012 #21
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #24
ananda Apr 2012 #46
lunatica Apr 2012 #47
seabeyond Apr 2012 #55
Blue_Tires Apr 2012 #58
Zalatix Apr 2012 #4
LadyHawkAZ Apr 2012 #35
Rex Apr 2012 #5
flamingdem Apr 2012 #8
Rex Apr 2012 #11
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #13
Rex Apr 2012 #20
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #25
Tom Ripley Apr 2012 #28
Tom Ripley Apr 2012 #28
Rex Apr 2012 #33
Tom Ripley Apr 2012 #37
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #70
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #76
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #78
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #79
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #81
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #83
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #84
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #85
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #86
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #87
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #88
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #89
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #90
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #91
MADem Apr 2012 #18
Tom Ripley Apr 2012 #27
Rex Apr 2012 #34
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #38
Tom Ripley Apr 2012 #50
Rex Apr 2012 #59
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #69
Rex Apr 2012 #75
flamingdem Apr 2012 #6
BeyondGeography Apr 2012 #7
MADem Apr 2012 #16
Lucy Goosey Apr 2012 #9
Kablooie Apr 2012 #31
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #10
flamingdem Apr 2012 #22
Sarah Ibarruri Apr 2012 #23
ProfessorGAC Apr 2012 #53
eridani Apr 2012 #41
nolabels Apr 2012 #42
Marrah_G Apr 2012 #62
Tom Ripley Apr 2012 #14
MADem Apr 2012 #15
tawadi Apr 2012 #17
Odin2005 Apr 2012 #19
Ikonoklast Apr 2012 #26
Rex Apr 2012 #36
sarge43 Apr 2012 #40
GoCubsGo Apr 2012 #52
gauguin57 Apr 2012 #30
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #39
Kablooie Apr 2012 #32
Ship of Fools Apr 2012 #43
no_hypocrisy Apr 2012 #44
ananda Apr 2012 #45
mainer Apr 2012 #48
flamingdem Apr 2012 #54
Iris Apr 2012 #49
Chorophyll Apr 2012 #51
blogslut Apr 2012 #71
MineralMan Apr 2012 #56
whatchamacallit Apr 2012 #57
MadrasT Apr 2012 #60
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #73
Marrah_G Apr 2012 #61
Iris Apr 2012 #63
Marrah_G Apr 2012 #64
Iris Apr 2012 #66
tallahasseedem Apr 2012 #67
jp11 Apr 2012 #65
Blaukraut Apr 2012 #68
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #72
Chorophyll Apr 2012 #74
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #77
Chorophyll Apr 2012 #80
Warren DeMontague Apr 2012 #82

Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:09 AM

1. This can't be real.

Tasteless parody or senseless Poe?

No fucking way.

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Response to chollybocker (Reply #1)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:12 AM

2. here also, right hand side, "On The Cover" :

Last edited Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:12 AM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek.html

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:15 AM

3. Note how they make it seem sexy and good with such a knock out woman?

 

I wonder how different the effect on women and men would be if that image was more representative of the 40+ #s overweight many women are, and the right age too, not too many that young are "powerful women" yet.

Just saying.

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Response to Lionessa (Reply #3)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:26 AM

12. Exactly, that pic shows a very skinny model, not at all representative

of the average and the majority of females on this planet. On the other hand, magazines are photoshopping the hell out of women today to make them all look 85 lbs.

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #12)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:00 AM

21. I think you're missing my point.

 

Last edited Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:01 AM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

I'm trying to say that by sexualizing it in such a way, they are implicitly suggesting that wanting to be dominated is something to be striven for.

I think if it was more representative of reality, more women might think, yeah, sometimes but yuck, no not something I want to strive for nor be "okay" with.

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Response to Lionessa (Reply #21)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:04 AM

24. I get it. nt

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Response to Lionessa (Reply #3)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 07:25 AM

46. Women have to be pornworthy these days...

... to make it in the media, show business, and often politics.

It's a very sick world we live in.

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Response to ananda (Reply #46)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 07:34 AM

47. This is a very astute observation

I wish I could rec this.

As a woman you're either June Cleaver or a whore. Nothing in between.

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Response to ananda (Reply #46)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 09:59 AM

55. yup lunatica and ananda. nt

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Response to ananda (Reply #46)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 10:58 AM

58. +1000

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:17 AM

4. Is there a ship off this planet?

 

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Response to Zalatix (Reply #4)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:39 AM

35. Yes, but it's owned by Newt Gingrich. Pick your poison. n/t

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:19 AM

5. As opposed to the secret fantasy life of working men

that write and edit magazines. Maybe called Newsweek. Can we crawl down into their pants with a camera? Maybe they could have at least found a woman that looks more like the average working woman and not a supermodel. I know they are going for the stupid affect, but really do they have to include all the faulsauce together on the cover? Speaking of that, why cover her eyes? Just to give it that S&M look?

Oh right, that was the whole point...carry on.

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Response to Rex (Reply #5)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:22 AM

8. +1 for faulsauce

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #8)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:26 AM

11. I cannot believe they are towing the M$Ms line.

Pathetic, I would rather beg for cash if it was me.

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Response to Rex (Reply #5)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:28 AM

13. haha! The writer and editor were fetishists who had themselves some plywood in

their pants while writing this?

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #13)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:58 AM

20. Well if they were thinking about powerful women secretly wanting

to feel powerless, they could have picked any number of visual situations besides sex to put on the cover...the fact that they went for the bondage look, meh dunno I am a guy and that was my first thought. Maybe they are into bondage and super models!?

I think it is to sell magazines.

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Response to Rex (Reply #20)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:05 AM

25. Maybe they are afraid of the Anna Wintours of the world nt

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #25)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:04 AM

28. I find Anna Wintour pretty frightening :)

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #25)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:04 AM

28. I find Anna Wintour pretty frightening :)

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Response to Tom Ripley (Reply #28)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:34 AM

33. You must, you must!!!

nt.

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Response to Rex (Reply #33)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 03:06 AM

37. Once for that wig, the other for those bug shades

Then there's that whole plain girl making a career out of picking on the pretty girls thing...

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #13)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:43 PM

70. Perhaps you haven't heard who is running Newsweek, these days.



She's royally fucked it up, too... And I'm not saying that just because a she's British.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #70)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 07:38 PM

76. She majored in sensationalism. She's clearly selling the magazine to men.

I've asked some women friends about the article and issue, and they think the thing is fucking demented, and totally out of touch. However, I'll betcha anything this issue is selling like hotcakes among men who get off on that.

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #76)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 11:09 PM

78. She's selling the magazine to men? Really?

Men who are more interested in fashion stories and the British royal family than actual news, maybe.

I'd be extremely curious to see if you find any hard demographic data to back up that assertion.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #78)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 07:02 AM

79. The cover shows a frumpy Queen of England? Or a skinny female playing victim in a sexual fetish

pose?

I think the cover is an attempt to get males to buy Newsweek (a la Maxim).

What happens after that, is hopefully that they'll get interested in whatever Newsweek happens to feature that week.

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #79)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 03:44 PM

81. Like I said, I'd be interested to see what the demographics are pre and post Tina Brown takeover.

Last edited Tue Apr 17, 2012, 03:45 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

A week ago, Newsweek was being hailed as brave feminist fighters for standing up for "puffy" Ashley Judd against the terrible male gaze misogynists at US magazine, with its 80% female readership.

Saying "it's designed to appeal to men because obviously it's designed to appeal to men" is an opinion, but not much else.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #81)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 07:54 PM

83. Do you think that showing women naked or in sexualized poses is done because for women? nt

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #83)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 07:59 PM

84. I see a woman with a tie wrapped around her head.

Maybe in your neighborhood, that's "sexy". Not mine.

I think the 50 shades of grey readership is OVERWHELMINGLY female, and that's what the inconvenient article with its inconvenient assertions is about.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #84)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:00 PM

85. Then I do believe you have been entirely too sheltered, if all you see is a scarf. nt

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #85)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:05 PM

86. I see a tie, not a scarf.

Last edited Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:06 PM USA/ET - Edit history (2)

The tie is a reference to 50 shades of grey, which has been enormously popular with female readers, despite the inconvenience of that fact to some small remaining islets of aging 2nd wave feminists.

I guess those women who like that book, the woman who wrote it, the woman who wrote the article for newsweek and the woman who publishes it, didn't get the memo.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #86)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:06 PM

87. If all you see is a tie, then you have been unduly sheltered. nt

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #87)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:09 PM

88. Yep.

I haven't read "twilight", either, and it's been over a decade since I had sex... with a republican.

I'm sure many who read this post are much more, er, worldly in those regards than myself...

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #88)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:14 PM

89. :) That's ok. Trust me though, that cover is not about fashion. nt

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #89)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:20 PM

90. I know, it's about 50 shades of grey and cheesy bondage porn aimed at women.

Last edited Tue Apr 17, 2012, 08:20 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

All I know is, I should have been a writer of low brow fiction.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #90)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 10:50 PM

91. It's never too late. nt

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Response to Rex (Reply #5)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:56 AM

18. Isn't Tina Brown editing that thing?

I think she's following the trend, not leading it. I saw this shit on TV a few days back.

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Response to MADem (Reply #18)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:50 AM

27. That bosomy Brit vulgarian is indeed editing that thing

She's Lady Midas In Reverse; everything she touches turns to shit

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Response to MADem (Reply #18)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:36 AM

34. Well it is all about selling...ahem news.

It's bondage news week!

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Response to Rex (Reply #5)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:08 AM

38. You mean, ah, "working men" ...with names like Tina Brown?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tina_Brown

Sorry, but ever since her Daily Beast took over, Newsweek has been a swirling vortex of suck.

Unless you like fashion stories and endless amounts of blibber-blabber about the British Royal Family.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #38)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 08:46 AM

50. She also wrecked The New Yorker; took it from midcult to lower-midcult

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #38)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 11:03 AM

59. I am as surprised as you are.

I figured the editors were reading one too many comic books with the impossible women as their inspiration. I believe it was about two decades ago (now that I've had a night to think about it) that I recommended an article out of Newsweek to somebody. At one time, it was a halfway decent magazine.

Seems so long ago.

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Response to Rex (Reply #59)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:39 PM

69. I cancelled my subscription, because I now find it nearly unreadable.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #69)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 06:52 PM

75. Looks like they are drinking the same kool-aid as the M$M.

nt.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:19 AM

6. This is so creepy

Newsweek fail. I see many complaints leading to a sold out issue however and the acceptance by the mainstream that all women want to be raped, kind of, this is so fitting with the repuke drive against women. I thought Newsweek was trending a tad more liberal..

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:20 AM

7. That woman never worked a day in her life

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Response to BeyondGeography (Reply #7)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:53 AM

16. YOU WIN THE THREAD!!!



Seriously, that was hilarious!

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:22 AM

9. I hate everybody

Okay, no, but what the fuck is this? When has Katie Roiphe ever been relevant? HBO's Girls and Fifty Shades of Grey are fiction. Fiction! Why is it being presented as reality in the cover of a so-called news mag?

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Response to Lucy Goosey (Reply #9)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:29 AM

31. Fiction to you but reality to the characters in the stories.

You just have a different point of view.

As I do when writing this kind of inanity.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:24 AM

10. I so don't believe this. Sex play is fun, whether it's one or the other playing alpha, but I

seriously doubt women are wanting to be overpowered regularly any more than men are regularly wanting to be overpowered by women. Besides, the same thing every time would seem boring as hell.

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #10)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:00 AM

22. Maybe "overpower" = "show a little enthusiam for once Harry"

The overpower thing could just be the idea that the guy is "so into" as opposed to "not that into" her

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #22)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:04 AM

23. LOL! Maybe so. nt

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #22)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 09:02 AM

53. Funniest Comment On This Thread!

Good one.
GAC

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Response to Sarah Ibarruri (Reply #10)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 05:04 AM

41. Pro doms report that their most reliable customers are powerful men

Why wouldn't the same dynamic work for women. According to various kinky people, subs outnumber doms across the board, regardless of gender or sexual orientation. That makes a certain amount of sense--after all, there are always more people in the audience than on stage, and more readers than writers.

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Response to eridani (Reply #41)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 05:58 AM

42. Thanks for the insight on what is

I often wonder why large groupings of people make me apprehensive, the thoughtlessness of the follow the leader crowd and why it all seemed so foolish. Must be some inbred genetic trait i was lucky enough to miss

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Response to eridani (Reply #41)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:49 PM

62. It's very true

People on the submissive side of BDSM often do so as an escape from having to make decisions and being "in charge".

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:29 AM

14. Man, if Helmut Newton's estate could claim all royalties due...

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:52 AM

15. This shit was on TV the other day-- a woman was saying that all the "moms"

waiting outside the school in their minivans were reading that book while they waited , and a cadre of women were all giggling about it and talking about it as if it was the greatest thing since sliced bread.

I reached for the remote--I just didn't want to deal with that foolishness.

Point is, though, Newsweek isn't operating in a vacuum. I guess that War On Women is being fought on many fronts...?

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:55 AM

17. Looks more like a cover for Vogue. eom

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 12:57 AM

19. Sexist horseshit!

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:22 AM

26. I'm old enough to remember when Newsweek wrote about, well, the news.

It's been years since that last happened.

When did the National Enquirer buy the name?

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Response to Ikonoklast (Reply #26)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:41 AM

36. Same here! Was trying to remember what year it was

I recommended an article out of Newsweek. Nope, drawing a blank.

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Response to Ikonoklast (Reply #26)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:30 AM

40. Newsweak jumped the shark

when it glammed up Paula Jones and made her cover girl. It's been circling the drain ever since.

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Response to Ikonoklast (Reply #26)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 08:53 AM

52. I thought they folded a few years ago.

Last edited Mon Apr 16, 2012, 08:54 AM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

I guess not. But, it looks like they should have.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:23 AM

30. All this tells me is that the marketing whizzes at Vintage books are working overtime

They know getting the media to analyze a trend to death (and give them an excuse to run this kind of provocative cover) will continue to sell the books of the "Fifty Shades of Grey" trilogy.

Vintage is behind all this chatter (and coverage) ... pure and simple.

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Response to gauguin57 (Reply #30)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:09 AM

39. How about one on how "Tiger Moms love Bondage!"

I think we have a winner$$$$!!!!!

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:32 AM

32. Ah. Now I understand women. I'll show this to my wife so she'll submit to me.

for the first time in our lives.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 07:17 AM

43. Please Please PLEASE let this be The Onion

string of expletives deleted.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 07:19 AM

44. Working Girl: 2012

Bad enough if a man designed and approved this cover. Worse if women signed off on it.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 07:23 AM

45. This is utter bullshit.

Media crap for profits.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 08:37 AM

48. "Fifty Shades of Grey" is what inspired this article

I haven't read the book, but apparently it's a HUGE hit among women. Has anyone read it?

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Response to mainer (Reply #48)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 09:56 AM

54. Here's a review from the NYT - the Cinderella fantasy + spanking

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/03/books/fifty-shades-of-grey-s-and-m-cinderella.html

This S-and-M story about a virginal college student and the handsome young billionaire who binds her sounds racier than it is. Mostly it’s an updated throwback to scandalous novels of the past, including “Jane Eyre” and the 1920s desert rape fantasy “The Sheik.” The main difference is that “Fifty Shades of Grey” and its two sequels, “Fifty Shades Darker” and “Fifty Shades Freed,” are set in modern-day Seattle and mix sexting with spanking.

In other words, “Fifty Shades of Grey” is to publishing what Spanx was to the undergarment business: an antiquated product re-imagined as innovation. When Sara Blakely, a former office equipment saleswoman, wanted control-top pantyhose without the hose and figured that other women might too, she started her own company, Spanx. Women embraced her light-weight girdle — once known as a foundation garment — as a body-shaping breakthrough. Ms. Blakely is now on the Forbes list of billionaires.

Similarly E L James, the British author of “Shades of Grey,” a former television executive who became an author by posting fan fiction online, wrote a typical romance novel, added some atypical sex and became an Internet sensation. Lots of women who weren’t used to reading erotic novels discovered “Shades of Grey.” And downloading was a huge part of the books’ success: readers who heard of the book from friends or Facebook could check it out instantly, cheaply and most of all, privately.

“Fifty Shades of Grey” doesn’t defy taboos in the way that other recent and much-talked-about books and magazine articles have, be it Toni Bentley’s ode to anal sex, “The Surrender: An Erotic Memoir”; Kathryn Harrison’s account of incest, “The Kiss”; or Daphne Merkin’s revelation of her spanking fetish in The New Yorker. Those accounts shocked mostly because the authors were well-known writers confessing to unseemly sexual vices. MORE

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 08:45 AM

49. Blown way out of proportion

And nothing new, really. I think it's pretty common knowledge that sexual fantasies can be born out of what happens in day to day life. Is Newsweek implying there are no business men who are submissives or have that fantasy?

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 08:50 AM

51. Katie Roiphe, huh? That explains it.

Her personal experience applies to ALL of us women, dontcha know. She speaks for every woman who ever had a job. And the fact that a bunch of women read "Fifty Shades of Grey" means that we ALL long to be submissive in our real lives.

Nice cover by Newsweek too.

I hope I don't need to put the sarcasm thingy.

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Response to Chorophyll (Reply #51)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:45 PM

71. Ms. Roiphe is quite atrocious

Last edited Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:46 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

Bleh on her and all stupid "trend" articles.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 10:08 AM

56. Sex sells magazines.

Last edited Mon Apr 16, 2012, 10:11 AM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

and there it is. If circulation is down, put a naked woman on the cover. Problem solved. A writer can be found to write any foolishness needed to sell magazines.

Uff da!

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 10:56 AM

57. That cover creeps me out

Wtf Newsweek.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:43 PM

60. Next week I wanna see

Last edited Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:44 PM USA/ET - Edit history (1)

A submissive man on his knees kissing a woman's foot in a black leather stiletto boot.

Fuck Newsweek and its projections.

Kinky sex is as old as the hills, and it comes in far more flavors than "submissive female".

"Surrender is a feminist dream" my ass. Everything any woman anywhere does any time, does not equal "feminism", for fuck's sake.

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Response to MadrasT (Reply #60)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:52 PM

73. So do I.

I mean, uh, you know, for research purposes only. Honest.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:47 PM

61. I can tell you why some women like it and why some men like it.

Many people on the submissive side of things in the BDSM world enjoy that aspect because during the rest of their lives they have to constantly be taking care of others, working, running a house, raising children. They get overwhelmed with having to be constantly making decisions about everything that they use this sexual choice as an escape.

I am not making a judgement as to whether this is right or wrong, I am just relaying the reasons behind the choice for many.

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Response to Marrah_G (Reply #61)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:51 PM

63. That's what I was trying to say up thread.

It's sex. People's sex live are complex and private and individual. I'm not sure what the intent of this article is b/c I don't really care about reading it. I would hope it mentions somewhere that these fantasies are fairly common amongst powerful men as well.

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Response to Iris (Reply #63)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 01:54 PM

64. It's one of the reasons why supermarket historical romance books are so popular.

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Response to Marrah_G (Reply #64)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:44 PM

66. haha! Yes, exactly!

It's not exactly rocket science!

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Response to Iris (Reply #63)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:52 PM

67. Exactly...

As long as the participants are willing ones, that's their business.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:40 PM

65. Really what?

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 02:54 PM

68. Never mind that in an S&M type sexual relationship, the Submissive is actually in control and holds

The power. Aside from that, sexual fantasies are just that - fantasies. Most women's fantasies aren't anything they would ever want to live out in real life, threesomes being a good example. Reality would look a whole lot different that fantasy in most cases.
Newsweek is psychoanalyzing a bit too much here.

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Response to kpete (Original post)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 04:50 PM

72. I'm not going to tell consenting adults how to get or not get their jollies.

I will even go so far as to say that I will graciously permit adult women to decide for themselves what sorts of books they choose to read, what kind of erotica they wish to view, and how they choose to get off.

Aren't I reasonable? I know, I'm skirting the bounds of making Jesus angry perpetuating the male gaze heteronormative phallopressive oppresionotronic, wisgrovenikul patriarchy, but really, if this is what the soccer moms want, shit, that's their business. Same as if Dick Morris wants to suck a toe. Just leave me out of it.

That said, I've heard the writing in these books is atrocious.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #72)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 06:37 PM

74. The point is, what "soccer moms" or anyone else want in the bedroom

or in their erotic literature does NOT automatically mean wanting to be "dominated" in the workplace or in the world at large. If Katie Roiphe doesn't understand that, she should STFU.

Also, the notion that women are now in charge of things when we only make up about 15% of Congress (and an even smaller percentage of CEOs) is just plain silly

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Response to Chorophyll (Reply #74)

Mon Apr 16, 2012, 11:06 PM

77. I agree with both your points.

Of course, as noted elsewhere in the thread, strong successful men seem to have a higher preponderance of sub sexual orientation, too. And given that the "strong, dominant man" in these 50 shades types stories is often one of these strong successful alpha types (who in reality is possibly more likely to be looking to be on the other end of that Power exchange) its quite possible that this sexual power dynamic is something akin to a cat chasing its own tail.

Off the subject, though, patti smith rocks.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #77)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 11:43 AM

80. I guess I sort of don't care about the sexuality of other people all that much.

Unless I'm directly involved. But Katie Roiphe is a freaking sloppy thinker and I'm really done with her.

Patti does indeed rock!

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Response to Chorophyll (Reply #80)

Tue Apr 17, 2012, 03:45 PM

82. Ill be honest, I didnt read the whole thing.

Nor am I all that interested in reading the book in question.

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