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Fri May 30, 2014, 03:30 PM

what do you rhink the legal age to consent sex should be?


80 votes, 2 passes | Time left: Unlimited
15
10 (13%)
16
37 (46%)
17
2 (3%)
18
26 (33%)
19
0 (0%)
20
0 (0%)
21
5 (6%)
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143 replies, 4436 views

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Arrow 143 replies Author Time Post
Reply what do you rhink the legal age to consent sex should be? (Original post)
arely staircase May 2014 OP
winter is coming May 2014 #1
Iggo May 2014 #3
Lasher May 2014 #7
Jamastiene May 2014 #10
Egnever May 2014 #24
dipsydoodle May 2014 #29
Louisiana1976 May 2014 #97
bemildred May 2014 #2
LittleBlue May 2014 #4
ManiacJoe May 2014 #118
Leme May 2014 #139
Blue_Adept May 2014 #5
penultimate May 2014 #32
AngryAmish May 2014 #6
Jamastiene May 2014 #64
1StrongBlackMan May 2014 #84
AngryAmish May 2014 #87
1StrongBlackMan May 2014 #91
Warren DeMontague May 2014 #126
1StrongBlackMan May 2014 #130
Warren DeMontague May 2014 #140
redqueen May 2014 #89
ManiacJoe May 2014 #141
Jamastiene May 2014 #90
RiffRandell May 2014 #136
redqueen May 2014 #8
Nye Bevan May 2014 #12
redqueen May 2014 #15
Nye Bevan May 2014 #16
redqueen May 2014 #28
arely staircase May 2014 #131
pintobean May 2014 #17
LanternWaste May 2014 #23
Nye Bevan May 2014 #69
redqueen May 2014 #77
pintobean May 2014 #79
redqueen May 2014 #82
pintobean May 2014 #85
redqueen May 2014 #88
pintobean May 2014 #93
joeglow3 May 2014 #71
Kurska May 2014 #120
Warren DeMontague May 2014 #127
Jamastiene May 2014 #9
DrDan May 2014 #13
Jamastiene May 2014 #52
Egnever May 2014 #65
Jamastiene May 2014 #70
DrDan May 2014 #74
Egnever May 2014 #115
Egnever May 2014 #26
Jamastiene May 2014 #27
jberryhill May 2014 #34
Jamastiene May 2014 #35
jberryhill May 2014 #37
Jamastiene May 2014 #41
jberryhill May 2014 #43
Jamastiene May 2014 #47
jberryhill May 2014 #53
Jamastiene May 2014 #57
jberryhill May 2014 #60
AngryAmish May 2014 #62
Chan790 May 2014 #75
Comrade Grumpy May 2014 #39
jberryhill May 2014 #42
Jamastiene May 2014 #55
jberryhill May 2014 #58
Jamastiene May 2014 #66
jberryhill May 2014 #72
AngryAmish May 2014 #73
Jamastiene May 2014 #81
madville May 2014 #133
Jamastiene May 2014 #135
arely staircase May 2014 #137
Laffy Kat May 2014 #107
Jamastiene May 2014 #116
Spider Jerusalem May 2014 #129
Liberal Veteran May 2014 #11
bemildred May 2014 #14
Erich Bloodaxe BSN May 2014 #100
bemildred May 2014 #103
Erich Bloodaxe BSN May 2014 #106
bemildred May 2014 #108
arely staircase May 2014 #138
treestar May 2014 #20
Erich Bloodaxe BSN May 2014 #18
Louisiana1976 May 2014 #99
Lee-Lee May 2014 #19
Arkana May 2014 #21
jberryhill May 2014 #40
Jamastiene May 2014 #68
sarisataka May 2014 #22
NightWatcher May 2014 #25
Douglas Carpenter May 2014 #30
jberryhill May 2014 #38
Louisiana1976 May 2014 #102
Douglas Carpenter May 2014 #128
jberryhill May 2014 #31
LadyHawkAZ May 2014 #33
one_voice May 2014 #105
ZombieHorde May 2014 #36
redqueen May 2014 #44
NuclearDem May 2014 #48
redqueen May 2014 #54
NuclearDem May 2014 #61
redqueen May 2014 #76
Algernon Moncrieff May 2014 #45
NuclearDem May 2014 #46
Cal33 May 2014 #49
panader0 May 2014 #50
Prophet 451 May 2014 #51
Warpy May 2014 #56
AngryAmish May 2014 #63
Warpy May 2014 #78
Warren DeMontague May 2014 #59
gollygee May 2014 #67
jeff47 May 2014 #80
raccoon May 2014 #83
genwah May 2014 #92
ismnotwasm May 2014 #86
arely staircase Jun 2014 #143
FSogol May 2014 #94
Logical May 2014 #95
cali May 2014 #96
redqueen May 2014 #101
cali May 2014 #124
Logical May 2014 #111
struggle4progress May 2014 #98
deathrind May 2014 #104
gollygee May 2014 #109
redqueen May 2014 #112
deathrind May 2014 #113
uppityperson May 2014 #110
deathrind May 2014 #114
Iggo May 2014 #117
ecstatic May 2014 #119
Harmony Blue May 2014 #121
Kurska May 2014 #122
wickerwoman May 2014 #123
KitSileya May 2014 #125
Ballast_Point May 2014 #132
DireStrike May 2014 #134
Shoulders of Giants May 2014 #142

Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:35 PM

1. Old enough to use spell check. n/t

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Response to winter is coming (Reply #1)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:39 PM

3. Heh.

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Response to winter is coming (Reply #1)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:45 PM

7. Hahaha!!

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Response to winter is coming (Reply #1)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:47 PM

10. You rhink?

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Response to winter is coming (Reply #1)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:37 PM

24. DUzy!

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Response to winter is coming (Reply #1)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:45 PM

29. Hmm

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Response to winter is coming (Reply #1)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:13 PM

97. ....

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:36 PM

2. Ten years younger than I am. nt

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:41 PM

4. 16

Works in Washington State.

16-year-olds are gonna do what they want to do anyway.

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Response to LittleBlue (Reply #4)

Fri May 30, 2014, 09:31 PM

118. Exactly.

16 covers the situation where one graduates from high school before the other. Everything under 16 is governed by the age difference.

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Response to ManiacJoe (Reply #118)

Sat May 31, 2014, 02:38 PM

139. I was thinking 18 and everything under 18 is governed by the age difference. 19/17..ok etc

 

less than 14... not allowed

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:42 PM

5. I wanted an older option.

Realistically, I wanted an option for when ones parents says it's okay for it to happen.

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Response to Blue_Adept (Reply #5)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:48 PM

32. When the parents say so?

That could be bad going both ways...

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:45 PM

6. I put 16 but I am rethinking that

First, there needs to be a large Romeo and Juliet loophole so we do not criminalize normal stupid teenager sex.

Second, I just read that the average age of losing virginity is 17. Maybe we need to make it 15 or less. We need to stop making reasons to fill the prisons. So if two 13 year Olds hook up it is not a crime. A 20 year old and a 13 year old, that is a crime.

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #6)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:18 PM

64. That sounds more reasonable, except the 15 year old part.

Make it 16 or 18 instead and I can agree completely. Some people who are now on my ignore list seem to think I want to criminalize underage teens for doing what underage teens do with each other.

13 and 13, kids doing what kids do. 20 and 13, no fucking way.

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #6)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:43 PM

84. I can only think of a few instances where ...

" normal stupid teenager sex" has been prosecuted (in the past few years) ... once involved the prosecution of a Black 16 year old male (15 year old white female lover); the other instance involved the prosecution of a just turned 18 year old female (16 year old female lover).

Just saying ... normal stupid teenager sex is not widely criminalized, just stupid teenage sex where one of the participants is of a marginalized group.

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Response to 1StrongBlackMan (Reply #84)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:53 PM

87. And that, my friend, is why we should have fewer laws, not more

When prosecutors get broad powers the lowest on the totem pole get put in jail.

Fewer crimes, less lives ruined.

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #87)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:58 PM

91. I would settle for equal enforcement of the laws ...

as each (most) have a valid and real reason for existing.

If the prosecutor, for one second thought his/her precious seed would be subjected to that which he/she subjects others ... things would balance out.

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Response to 1StrongBlackMan (Reply #91)

Sat May 31, 2014, 03:38 AM

126. You think there are 'valid reasons' to arrest a 16 & 15 y/o for consensual "stupid teenage sex"?

Eh, I don't.

Did you have sex in high school? I did. So did a good percentage of my classmates, IIRC.

i'm not willing to rely on prosecutors' concerns for their own "precious seed" (your word choice) to ensure reasonable enforcement - or lack thereof- of laws criminalizing what is perfectly normal and fairly common teen behavior.

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Response to Warren DeMontague (Reply #126)

Sat May 31, 2014, 08:41 AM

130. I never said or implied that ...

think there are 'valid reasons' to arrest a 16 & 15 y/o for consensual "stupid teenage sex" ... Now did I?

I have not commented on the efficacy, the legitimacy or the wisdom/stupidity of such laws; but the fact is, those laws exist ... despite your wish that they did not.

I remember awhile back, I commented on an article where a father shot a man that the father found in bed with his 16(?) yr old daughter, in the early hours of the morning. I commented that if I it were me ... unknown man, my teenage daughter, early morning ... I couldn't say that I wouldn't have shot, too.

I believe that it was you, that responded that I was a father attempting to "control (my) daughter's vagina."

You seem to have a pattern of responding to stuff that was only said in your head ... or maybe it's just the way you respond to me.

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Response to 1StrongBlackMan (Reply #130)

Sat May 31, 2014, 04:57 PM

140. Not having an encylopedic knowledge of every discussion ever had on DU, I couldn't say.

What you said in this thread was, quote, "each (most) have a valid and real reason for existing." Meaning these laws.

That was a follow up post to one where you specifically brought up an example of a 16 & 15 yo being prosecuted for sex as an example of unequal enforcement of one if these laws based upon race or orientation, which i have no doubt is the case oftentimes.

You didn't specify that laws criminalizing teen sex were exempt from that, but you did say that most of the laws have a "valid and real reason for existing".

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Response to 1StrongBlackMan (Reply #84)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:57 PM

89. It's telling that the discussion isn't usually about the need for more Romeo and Juliet laws...

but instead often focuses on lowering the age of consent.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #89)

Sat May 31, 2014, 05:17 PM

141. That is often due to the bad phrasing of the question in the OP.

Like in this case.

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Response to 1StrongBlackMan (Reply #84)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:57 PM

90. That does seem to be the few times they ever do prosecute.

Most of the time, if it's straight white kids, they let it slide, but if it is a black male and white female or even a black male and black female in a lot of cases, or a gay couple, they don't hesitate to all of a sudden prosecute. And when they do, it is to the fullest extent of the law then.

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #6)

Sat May 31, 2014, 01:19 PM

136. Look at the Marcus Dixon case in GA.

I have a hard time answering this poll because of it.

Convicted of aggravated child molestation which was a law that was supposed to protect children from sexual predators...the prosecutor didn't have to charge him with it; the girl was 3 months away from turning 16, he was 18 and if convicted, 10 years mandatory prison sentence.

Race played a huge factor, the jury believed the sex was consensual and cried when they found out what the conviction meant...they thought he would go home that day.

I was so happy when the GA Supreme Court overturned his conviction.

Dixon was raised in Rome, Ga., by his partly disabled grandmother. With her blessing, a local white Little League coach, Ken Jones, and his wife, Peri, became Marcus' legal guardians when he was 11, and he became part of their family, which includes a teenage son and daughter. Dixon had an almost 4.0 grade point average and a full scholarship to Vanderbilt University.

But in February 2003 Marcus had sex with a girl who was almost 16. According to reports, she told him that if her father found out he would kill them both, because her father was racist. Two days later, she accused him of rape.

In court, however, the principal charge of rape didn't stand up. Wright Edelman wrote, "In May, a jury of nine whites and three blacks took just 20 minutes to acquit Dixon of rape. There was no forced sex, they concluded." The jury was then obliged to consider a lesser charge of "aggravated child molestation." Aggravated child molestation is a charge for adults who prey on children, not usually for teens who have consensual sex.

"This statute had never before been used to prosecute consensual sex between teens with less than a three-year age difference," Edelman wrote, adding that "a majority of states have passed 'Romeo and Juliet' statutes - which deal with teen sex when both partners are close in age - for exactly these types of cases."


Link: http://www.afn.org/~iguana/archives/2004_03/20040304.html

More: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marcus_Dixon

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:47 PM

8. Can we get an option for "Why does it always seem to be adult men who ask about this?" nt

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Response to redqueen (Reply #8)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:57 PM

12. Actually, women *sometimes* ask that question. Even here on DU!

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Response to Nye Bevan (Reply #12)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:03 PM

15. The word 'almost' has a definite meaning.

And I imagine if you looked at the other discussions taking place when I asked, there is some contest there.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #15)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:19 PM

16. Who said "almost"? (nt)

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Response to Nye Bevan (Reply #16)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:43 PM

28. I meant to put it before "always". Regardless, I wonder what prompted this man to ask.

This time.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #28)

Sat May 31, 2014, 09:45 AM

131. wtf is that supposed to mean?

What prompted it is my 16 year ol niece has a 20 year ol BF. But thanks for implying I am a pervert.

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Response to Nye Bevan (Reply #12)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:24 PM

17. Lol.

Nailed again.

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Response to Nye Bevan (Reply #12)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:36 PM

23. Different question, yes?

Different question, yes? Or is Montoowesday the first day of the week?

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Response to LanternWaste (Reply #23)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:24 PM

69. Yeah. Asking "should the age of consent be lowered"

is 100% completely and utterly different fron asking "what should the age of consent be".

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Response to Nye Bevan (Reply #69)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:35 PM

77. Did you ever go back and see if there was any context there?

Other discussions going on at the time?

Might be revealing.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #77)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:38 PM

79. It was an OP

It was up to you to provide any context. Who the hell is going to go on that wild goose chase to try to find out what was going on in your head that day?

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Response to pintobean (Reply #79)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:41 PM

82. He went on the goose chase to do his context-free (i.e. meaningless) "gotcha"

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Response to redqueen (Reply #82)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:46 PM

85. I'm guessing he remembered it

and did a specific search to find the thread. I don't know how one would even go about trying to find "context" for what you may have been thinking at the time.

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Response to pintobean (Reply #85)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:53 PM

88. Guess whatever you like, I don't care.

As for your inability to think of ways to do things, not sure why you think that's worth discussing.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #88)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:02 PM

93. I don't know why you would think

it's on anyone else to justify your reason for posting anything.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #8)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:25 PM

71. Sometimes a question is just a question

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Response to redqueen (Reply #8)

Fri May 30, 2014, 10:02 PM

120. "You're not allowed to discuss this aspect of the law, otherwise you're a pedophile"

Did I get your implication correctly? Or am I missing something here?

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Response to Kurska (Reply #120)

Sat May 31, 2014, 03:53 AM

127. It makes perfect sense that people like that would hang around DU

Given that the average age here is like 84.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:47 PM

9. I rhink it should be 18. n/t

Anything lower and it is veering off into possible pedophilia territory.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #9)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:59 PM

13. I am with you with 18

a little more mature

harsher penalties for 15 and under however

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Response to DrDan (Reply #13)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:10 PM

52. Apparently, we are bad people for that.

Apparently, it should be 17 or something.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #52)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:19 PM

65. Or maybe some people dont think kids should go to jail for having sex?

Especially when they are of similar age.

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Response to Egnever (Reply #65)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:24 PM

70. Underage kids wouldn't go to jail if they were with each other.

It is when an older adult preys on young kids when it breaks the law. Duh.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #70)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:30 PM

74. exactly - thank you

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #70)

Fri May 30, 2014, 07:21 PM

115. how in the world you come to that conclusion is beyond me

If the age of consent is set to 18 anyone under 18 that had sex would be breaking the law and subject to jail time.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #9)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:40 PM

26. that would imply that consent means

ok to have sex with and older person.

what if both people are the same age?

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Response to Egnever (Reply #26)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:41 PM

27. Duh,

if both people are the same age, then no law would be broken. Quit splitting hairs.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #27)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:50 PM

34. And if one is 18 and the other 17?


Since it is so obvious to you, perhaps you might tease that analysis out a little bit more than "Duh".

In point of fact, in jurisidictions where it is "18 or its a crime" then BOTH 17 year-olds are committing a crime and can be charged with it.

But, okay, you are fine with them being the "same age". So, two 17 year olds are dating. One turns 18 in June and the other one turns 18 in August.

So they can have sex until June, have to stop in July, and can have sex again in August, or else one of them is a "pedophile".

Do I understand you correctly?

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #34)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:53 PM

35. No, they need to be 18+, so 17 is against the law.

You and your semantics.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #35)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:55 PM

37. I'm actually just trying to understand you.


So, if two 17 year olds have sex, and they can certainly be charged with it, both 17 year olds would go to jail for having sex.

Is that correct?

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #37)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:58 PM

41. Semantics, splitting hairs. 18+ means 18+. Period.

I guess if you work hard enough at it, you can lower the age to 1 month old. That still doesn't change that 18+ means 18+. Now, I'm thinking I should have said 21+ just to totally fuck your mind up.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #41)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:00 PM

43. It's a lot more than "semantics" when your 17 year old kid is charged with a crime

...for having sex with another 17 year old kid.

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #43)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:08 PM

47. Why are you so obsessed with 17 year olds?

They are not even adults. So, there would be no cops going after them. They are kids doing what kids do, ffs.

You can keep trying to whittle it down one year at the time but that still does not make pedophilia any more acceptable. And that is what these threads are always about, trying to get people to accept pedophilia as A-ok. That is something I won't do. Period.

Tell you what. The legal age in my state is 16. Come find you some 17 year olds and protect them from the law...that doesn't even bother to prosecute pedophiles unless it ends up in the news because the baby had a broken pelvis and people raised hell about it, much less go after teens unless they are making out somewhere where someone called the cops on them. You are being ridiculous.

You most definitely are using semantics and splitting hairs when you come up with such nonsense just to try to pick a fight for no fucking reason.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #47)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:11 PM

53. Because, apparently in your view, I should have been locked up at that age


"They are not even adults. So, there would be no cops going after them."

Um, 17 year olds regularly commit crimes and have cops going after them.

I'm curious to know why, when I was 17 and so was my partner, you believe we should have been arrested. That bespeaks a stranger obsession than the one you are imputing to me.

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #53)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:14 PM

57. You apparently did not read what I wrote.

Learn to read. Quit being ridiculous.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #57)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:15 PM

60. I did read what you wrote


And you seem to believe that 17 year olds can't be charged with crimes. That is ridiculously wrong.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #47)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:15 PM

62. I was in college at 17.

I had a scholarship but otherwise paid my own way. I lived out of my parents house. In fact I had a job at 12 and paid my own high school tuition. I help pay my parents mortgage because my dad got sick.

But of course if I chose to have sex with my boyfriend or girlfriend I would have been a criminal.

The average age of first sex is 17. You want to make half of Americans coming of age criminals.

That is absurd and sick.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #47)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:31 PM

75. Um...

because here in CT, until the age of majority was lowered to 16, the police arrested 15, 16 and 17 year-olds for having sex with other 15, 16, and 17 year-olds. In fact, that's the case in many places.

It's not a semantic question, it's a legal one with real consequences. I'm sorry you live in a state where law-enforcement and the courts turn a blind-eye to pedophilia and inconsistently enforces its own laws.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #35)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:58 PM

39. You want to throw an 18-year-old in jail for having sex with a 17-year-old?

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Response to Comrade Grumpy (Reply #39)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:58 PM

42. And two 17 year olds

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Response to Comrade Grumpy (Reply #39)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:12 PM

55. Yes, in this case, the 18 year old is breaking the law. n/t

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #55)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:14 PM

58. Okay so....


As you mentioned above, you don't seem to have a problem with two 17 year olds, but you believe that if one of them turns 18, they need to stop and wait for the other one to turn 18.

And this makes some kind of sense to you? Something two people were doing on Tuesday was legal. It becomes illegal on Wednesday, and then becomes legal again next week.

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Response to jberryhill (Reply #58)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:21 PM

66. Lol, keep trying to put words in my mouth.

You are being ridiculous about this. What do you want? No age of consent laws at all? Does that make sense to you? Any age someone picked in the poll, by your logic, you would argue one age lower and say they wanted to jail teens. You ARE splitting hairs.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #66)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:25 PM

72. No, it's fairly understandable

While I certainly understand that there are simple minded people who cannot deal with a rule that cannot be stated in five words or less, it's as easy as this sort of thing:

You can't have sex with someone under 18 if you are more than two years older than that person.

Is that too hard to wrap your head around? Too "semantic" or "hair splitting"?

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #55)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:29 PM

73. I think I see the problem

It is common in these laws to have a Romeo and Juliet exemption...similar ages do not get prosecuted. So seem to be advocating that anyone over 18 cannot have sex with anyone below 18. That creates an absurdity that if 2 kids have birthdays a few days apart have sex the older can be charged with a crime if it falls in the few days when one is 18 and the other 17.

Most states give a 2 or 3 year cushion, where a 19 year old can have sex with a 16 year old or so.

I am correctly stating your position?

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #73)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:40 PM

81. Yes.

Just keep adults from preying on kids. Age of consent should be for that purpose, to keep pedophiles away from kids, not to aggravate teenagers under the age of 18. Eighteen is what most consider adulthood. So, the 18 year old shouldn't be going after 13 year olds. They should learn to control themselves better than that. But, if they were close enough in age, the Romeo and Juliet exemption would kick in. It's not rocket science.

Here in NC, the age of consent is different than in SC. I live less than 5 miles from the SC line. In NC, it is 16. In SC, it is 18, or at least it was at the time. Back when I was 18, I could not date a girl who was 17 and was from SC. When she visited NC, I had to seriously think what to do. Legally here, I could have probably dated her, but not in SC. I ended up erring on the side of caution and just stayed friends with her with no relationship and no sex. By the time she was old enough in her own state, we had ended up just being friends. It wasn't the end of the world. It wasn't that hard to do. I had to be the adult and make an adult decision. It might have been different if we had met and started dating when we were both underage, but because I was the legal adult, I decided not to break the law. I don't see how that is so hard.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #81)

Sat May 31, 2014, 10:11 AM

133. Age of consent in SC is 16

It's been that way forever. They actually tried to raise it to 18 in SC about 10 years ago but the bill failed.

Both NC and SC are 16, you may have missed your opportunity

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Response to madville (Reply #133)

Sat May 31, 2014, 11:44 AM

135. I was told it was 18 in SC.

Crap, I did miss a good opportunity. She was really sweet.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #55)

Sat May 31, 2014, 02:33 PM

137. in texas the age of consent is 17

so no crime.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #9)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:39 PM

107. No it's not.

Pedophilia is defined by sexual attraction to a PRE-pubertal child. So, approximately twelve-years old and younger in most cases. Sexual attraction to YOUTH is ephebophilia. I would think that ephebophilia isn't at all uncommon. There are just morays and legal issues with acting on these desires. (I do love my Merck Manual .) Ha.

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Response to Laffy Kat (Reply #107)

Fri May 30, 2014, 09:05 PM

116. Ok, but in our youth oriented culture,

I would still argue that ephebophilia (thanks for the terminology, I love stuff like that too), is pretty popular. I just don't want to see people preying on young kids or younger teens. Older teens 18 and above, are usually considered adults. So, that would still be my best guess as to what I personally would think it best.

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Response to Jamastiene (Reply #9)

Sat May 31, 2014, 04:39 AM

129. No, it really isn't

paedophilia has a clinical meaning; it refers pretty specifically to sexual attraction to a prepubescent child. Most 15-year-olds are sexually mature. An adult who is sexually attracted to a 15-year-old isn't a paedophile. It's creepy for all sorts of reasons that have to do with power imbalances and maturity and the ability to make a freely informed choice, but it's not really sexually abnormal the way that actual paedophilia is.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 03:53 PM

11. 35.

Just to be safe. Some folks take a long time to grow up.

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Response to Liberal Veteran (Reply #11)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:02 PM

14. Can young people be trusted to have unsupervised sex?

That's what I want to know.

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Response to bemildred (Reply #14)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:24 PM

100. Are you suggesting they should be having supervised sex?

And is that supervisory position going to be a paid position, or volunteer?

Are you expected to give them pointers to make sure they don't 'do it wrong'?

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Response to Erich Bloodaxe BSN (Reply #100)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:31 PM

103. I'm sure volunteers will be no problem. nt

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Response to bemildred (Reply #103)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:38 PM

106. Would they be provided popcorn?

Or expected to bring their own?

(Gods only know, if there had been observers the first time I did the deed, there would have been much laughing, and I probably wouldn't have had the nerve to ever do it again...)

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Response to Erich Bloodaxe BSN (Reply #106)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:40 PM

108. I'm sorry, I think we have gone far enough in this direction.

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Response to Erich Bloodaxe BSN (Reply #106)

Sat May 31, 2014, 02:35 PM

138. anyone voluteering for thst is more likely to bring kleenex. nt

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Response to Liberal Veteran (Reply #11)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:28 PM

20. It really does depend on the person

This is why I hope this "virgin shaming" bit is MRA exaggeration. Nobody should feel pressured or made fun of for being on higher end of ages on this.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:25 PM

18. The same age as for drinking, driving, joining the military,

entering into binding legal contracts, and any other type of thing we put an age limit on with a given reason of 'being mature enough to do'.

If we're going to arbitrarily choose a single age for defining minor vs adult, let's have that be the one single age at which everyone is considered switching from minor to adult for every purpose.

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Response to Erich Bloodaxe BSN (Reply #18)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:22 PM

99. Well said.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:26 PM

19. It should be more complicated than just a flat age

Two 14 year olds having sex is not the same as a 19 year old having sex with a 14 year old. You need to account for what is normal activity within peer groups.

So something like: 13-18 years old no violation if they are within 24 months of age with each other.

So a 19 year old having sex with a 17 year old is ok- and pretty well normal- but a 21 year old having sex with a 16 year old is not. Likewise a 17 year old with a 13 year old is not typical.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:29 PM

21. Uh, why is 18 a problem?

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Response to Arkana (Reply #21)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:58 PM

40. Nobody said it was 18


But it is not 18 everywhere.

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Response to Arkana (Reply #21)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:23 PM

68. Because some seem to think you want to throw two 17 year olds in jail.

It sounds to me like some want no age of consent laws at all.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:31 PM

22. 18 works for most

in my daughter's case, two years after I die. Make it three for my son

The maturity of those younger than 18 (actually many older but we have to declare people adults at some age) is not typically sufficient to make a reasoned choice. I think relative ages should be considered when deciding punishment for those who violate the laws.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:37 PM

25. are you considering taking a new lover?

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:46 PM

30. sex should be banned

It spreads diseases and causes unwanted pregnancies as well as overpopulation. It leads or at least contributes significantly directly or indirectly to much if not most mental distress and personal quarrels. The vast majority of violent crimes are committed by people during the most sexually active periods of their life - Prior to and after the most sexually active period periods of peoples' lives we see far less violence, crime and discord. It is perhaps the single greatest contributor to unnecessary and frivolous spending as well as posing, posturing and provocative behavior. Sex and the sexual urge simply makes life far more complicated in all respects. Let's be as responsible with humans as we are with animals. Neutering and spaying prior to the onset of puberty should be mandatory and the moral and ethical responsibility of everyone.

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Response to Douglas Carpenter (Reply #30)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:57 PM

38. I always appreciate the arbitrarily excluded opinion


Make all sex illegal and, you are correct, the whole thing becomes pretty simple.

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Response to Douglas Carpenter (Reply #30)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:29 PM

102. If we had mandatory "neutering and spaying prior to the onset of puberty"

where would babies come from?

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Response to Louisiana1976 (Reply #102)

Sat May 31, 2014, 04:21 AM

128. like they always did - from God via the stork

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:46 PM

31. Flawed Poll


The notion that a 17 year old couple who has been sexually active need to stop during the time that one of them reaches 18 until the other one does, is ridiculous. I would venture to guess that most of those who say "18" would also agree to what are dubbed "Romeo and Juliet" provisions.

This poll also needs an operative definition of "sex". It's not as easy as you think, and many jurisdictions still struggle with a sufficiently inclusive definition that covers the number, mechanics and genders involved.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:48 PM

33. *16

provided there is some legal leeway for close-in-age consent so that shit like this doesn't happen. I'm not a huge fan of statutory rape laws, I think coercive or predatory activity ought to be covered under actual rape or pedophilia laws, but if we must have them, there needs to be enough wiggle room so we're not telling the teenagers who are ready that their consent doesn't matter.

Delicate balance, there.

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Response to LadyHawkAZ (Reply #33)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:37 PM

105. I'm going to piggy back on your comment...

I agree with you. I think 16 is an appropriate age.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 04:54 PM

36. I don't know.

I would like to know what psychologists around the world think about this question.

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Response to ZombieHorde (Reply #36)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:04 PM

44. Good question. nt

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Response to ZombieHorde (Reply #36)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:08 PM

48. Yeah, me too.

I'd like to know if having 18 as a legal age is actually appropriate or if it's because of sexual puritanism.

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Response to NuclearDem (Reply #48)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:12 PM

54. Probably something to do with preventing adults from taking advantage of minors. nt

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Response to redqueen (Reply #54)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:15 PM

61. Well, to clarify, I meant more among teenagers.

Not between adults and teenagers.

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Response to NuclearDem (Reply #61)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:33 PM

76. That's what the Romeo and Juliet laws are meant to protect.

If you search for 'age of consent' and 'misandry', or 'age of consent' and 'MRA' you will see why we have the laws, and it isn't Puritanism.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:06 PM

45. 18, but with a two-year roll down to 15.

The way that would work is this. The age of consent is 18; however, a 19 year old won't face charges for sleeping with an 17 year old; an 18 year old won't face charges for a 16 year old; a 17 year old won't face charges for sleeping with a 15 year old.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:06 PM

46. 18 with appropriate loopholes for close-in-age relationships.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:09 PM

49. As far as health is concerned, I read a long time ago that when a 16-year-old gives birth, the

chances of having a deformed baby are 1 in 5,000. By age 40, the chances
have become as high as 1 in 50. That's 100 times!

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:09 PM

50. Be close to your children, talk to them about things. everything, when they are young.

Instill sense in them, challenge them, be close to them. Then let them make their own decisions.
I told my daughters (2) to wait to have a child, wait until your education is accomplished, your adventures (the youthful ones) are over.
You have money in your bank account, etc. My eldest daughter fell for a guy four years ago on a trip to Alaska. She came home and asked for birth control. She waited.
My point is that your contact, as a parent, is the most positive way to insure that your kids will do it right.
The age of consent? whenever they can be responsible for what might happen.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:09 PM

51. It's 16 here

"Here" being the UK.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:14 PM

56. Old enough to deliver a pregnancy safely

and 16 is the lower limit of that.

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Response to Warpy (Reply #56)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:17 PM

63. There you go putting scientific knowledge into an emotional DU fight

It is much preferred to cuss at someone who does not agree with you.

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Response to AngryAmish (Reply #63)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:36 PM

78. The question of emotional maturity is a fucking minefield

(OK, that got the cussing out of the way)

The question, especially for girls, is whether or not their bodies can survive a complicated pregnancy without being torn apart.

That's 16. I'll leave it to other people to supply anecdata about why 16 is too young and 12 is old enough.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:15 PM

59. Teenagers have sex with each other, which is not the same as adults having sex with them.

Last edited Sat May 31, 2014, 03:31 AM - Edit history (1)

So 'legal age of consent' is a complex question.

It was pretty normal, when I was growing up, for 15-16 yr olds to have sex with each other. I think there are 2 questions, one being what should be the legal framework around teens having sex w/ each other, and then should there be (I think there should) a bright legal distinction for adulthood, starting at 18?

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:23 PM

67. I'm more concerned about the difference of age between the two people

than their specific age. I don't know the specific age but I'd have a "Romeo and Juliet" thing of 3 or 4 years.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:38 PM

80. Other

18, unless the all of the involved parties are within 4 years of age. If they are close in age, something around 14-16.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:41 PM

83. 60, for everyone.


Well, it would help keep the population down!


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Response to raccoon (Reply #83)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:59 PM

92. I was thinking somewhere in the early 40s.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 05:51 PM

86. Why?

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Response to ismnotwasm (Reply #86)

Sun Jun 1, 2014, 11:59 PM

143. why what? nt

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:04 PM

94. Constant rhino sex? What did I miss?

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:05 PM

95. 16 is too young and sort of disgusting so many selected it. n-t

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Response to Logical (Reply #95)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:10 PM

96. well then you must be horrified by me. I picked 15. Kids have sex with each other

I believe it's generally healthy or at least not detrimental. Clearly a 15 year old having sex with another 15 year old is different than a 15 year old having sex with a 20 year old.

I think it's kind of odd that people don't understand that adolescent sexuality in not only potent but normal.

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Response to cali (Reply #96)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:25 PM

101. Most don't, though.

Not sure what definition of 'normal' you're using there.

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Response to cali (Reply #96)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:46 PM

111. sick nt

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:20 PM

98. The states voted on this: 16% chose 17, 24% chose 18, and 62% chose 16

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:36 PM

104. From an evolutionary stand point...

This was decided hundreds of thousands of years ago. Clearly evolution got this one wrong.

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Response to deathrind (Reply #104)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:42 PM

109. It sounds like you're being sarcastic

which makes me think you think that it should be legal to have sex with anyone who has hit puberty, in which case I'll remind you that many girls hit puberty between 8 and 11. Do you think it should be legal for an adult to have sex with an 8- to 11-year-old child?

If I misunderstood you, then I apologize.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #109)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:48 PM

112. Reading that reminded me of an ugly rhyme that's used to push the idea

that very young teens (and pre teens) are mature enough for sex.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #109)

Fri May 30, 2014, 07:00 PM

113. No, I do not believe the age which

Evolution has determined that the human body is ready for procreation is the age that it should happen. In fact I am not entirely sure 18 is old enough in many cases given the possible ramifications of sex. Having said that my vote was at sixteen because realistically for a majority of people that is about the timeframe that the exploration in this area begins and if we were smart we would recognize that and instead of treating the act as something bad and pretending it does not happen we would teach young adults about it and about the responsibilities and the potentially deadly result that can happen from uneducated and unprotected sex.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 06:46 PM

110. with someone comparable or someone much older, teacher, person of power differential?

With people the same age or at most 2 years apart, 16.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 07:17 PM

114. As a society we...

... charge and prosecute 13/14/15 yr olds (in some cases even younger) as adults for violent crimes. Yet on this particular subject we are clearly not comfortable applying the same standard. Is this the right thing to do. I personally don't think so. If we are going to classify a person under 18 as a "child" or "young adult" it should be applied across the board.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)


Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 09:40 PM

119. 18, but if we're talking two high school kids around the same age

I don't think there should be any legal consequences involved. The statutory rape criteria should involve anyone 20 or older who is sexually involved with someone 17 or younger.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 10:06 PM

121. Legal adults

18 years old.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 10:11 PM

122. It is a hard subject matter for me.

When I was 13-14 I very much wanted to have sex other males, even someone in their 20's. I really don't think it would have done me considerable harm if the opportunity had presented itself earlier than the 2 years later when it did.

Then again, I'm not everyone and I understand the purpose of age of consent laws. It is still an awkward position for me to turn around and say "that should be illegal" for something that I would have willingly and happily done at that age. Then again, as I said I'm not everybody and laws are designed to protect people, often from their own mistakes.

Regardless, I think 15 or 16 would be fair and understandable, with the obvious caveat it can't be with someone who holds a position of power over them. There should also certainly be romeo and juliet laws within certain age ranges. One highschool student shouldn't go jail for having consensual sex with another highschool student, even if I think the age of consent should be above when one starts highschool.

It is all immaterial to me anyways. 18 would be a hard cutoff for me, regardless of the laws involved.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Fri May 30, 2014, 10:22 PM

123. The youngest age at which one could theoretically support a child.

Around 16.

If we consider kids younger than that too young to drive a car or hold down a full-time job, they are too immature to consent to an activity that could produce more kids.

It depends on the age of the partner though too. Two 15 year olds is not the same situation as a 16 year old and a 28 year old.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Sat May 31, 2014, 03:20 AM

125. I didn't vote.

Bwcause I think it should depend on the quality of sex ed available. If the schools are allowed to teach a proper sex ed course, with not only biology, contraception and how to avoid stds being taught, but also different types of sexual identities, a large block of time used on consent, and a serious, non-religious attitude, I think the age of consent should be 16.

In the US, it should uniformly be 18, untill they actally teach sex ed.

In both cases, there should be Romeo and Juliet laws, (age gap of which should be 4 years,) and if both are under 18, but consenting, no charges possible.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Sat May 31, 2014, 09:49 AM

132. Not sure if the people who chose 21 are serious or not...

 

You want to arrest the majority of every college student body?

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Sat May 31, 2014, 10:14 AM

134. Ask me again when we have a sane sex ed policy.

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Response to arely staircase (Original post)

Sat May 31, 2014, 05:24 PM

142. This is hard for me to figure out

But noone should ever have to register as a sex offender for having consensual sex with someone 1 or 2 years younger than them. That's needs fixed more than anything else.

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