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Sun May 5, 2013, 06:48 PM

NRA-Theism: Glenn Beck’s Jesus Was A Pistol-Packin’ Messiah

The keynote speaker for this year’s NRA convention in Houston was a real crowd pleaser with experience riling up weak-minded right-wing sheeple. Glenn Beck’s sermon was delivered with his usual flair for phony emotion and theatrics.

Beck set up his speech by fluffing the audience with praise for what awesome, charitable, courageous, sexy, patriots they all were. Of course, they lapped up this drooling approbation like thirsty puppies and rewarded Beck’s pandering with masturbatory applause. Beck gave the people exactly what they wanted and even titillated them with a teasing hint of a new project he would be announcing “in the coming days” with “major partners.”

The primary message of Beck’s program, however, was a more overarching appeal to the grand province of the Lord, with whom Beck frequently reminds folks that he is in close communication. Never mind that Beck’s interpretation of the divine is in stark contrast to that of most theologians. Take, for instance, how he inexplicably juxtaposes the mission of the NRA with that of the Prince of Peace by saying “Our right to keep and bear arms will not be infringed. We will follow the footsteps of Jesus Christ.” And while Beck never reveals where in scripture he learned that Jesus’ footsteps were fortified with firearms, he returned to the theme several times with pronouncements like this:

“Jesus was a man of God. He was a man of peace. He was a man of forgiveness. But make no mistake, Jesus Christ was also immoveable. The right to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed. And we will win by strapping on the full armor of God.”

http://www.newscorpse.com/ncWP/?p=9595


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Reply NRA-Theism: Glenn Beck’s Jesus Was A Pistol-Packin’ Messiah (Original post)
Ichingcarpenter May 2013 OP
The Velveteen Ocelot May 2013 #1
SummerSnow May 2013 #5
The Velveteen Ocelot May 2013 #6
ZRT2209 May 2013 #2
nobodyspecial May 2013 #3
OneGrassRoot May 2013 #4
SummerSnow May 2013 #7
cprise May 2013 #8

Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun May 5, 2013, 06:51 PM

1. Who would Jesus shoot?

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Response to The Velveteen Ocelot (Reply #1)

Sun May 5, 2013, 07:00 PM

5. Jesus wouldnt shoot anyone.....

But I can see him slapping Beck

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Response to SummerSnow (Reply #5)

Sun May 5, 2013, 07:08 PM

6. Or he'd just shrug his shoulders, say something like,

"Dude, you're going to hell," and walk away, rolling his eyes.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun May 5, 2013, 06:52 PM

2. Dear Glenn: God doesn't need your help. FYI.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun May 5, 2013, 06:56 PM

3. What an idiot

'And we will win by strapping on the full armor of God" That passage was not literally referring to armor and guns.

I'm an atheist, but part of me always wishes they are right. And when their time comes, God will point to how they twisted his words for their own gain and send them down to hell.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun May 5, 2013, 06:56 PM

4. OMG, did he speak today?

Oh, the irony.

I launched the COMPASSION REVOLUTION, in part inspired by my experience with Beck followers (after being mentioned on Beck's show a couple of years ago).


http://www.democraticunderground.com/10022803133

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun May 5, 2013, 07:12 PM

7. So now he has them believing..

Carrying a gun makes you Christ-like.

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Response to Ichingcarpenter (Original post)

Sun May 5, 2013, 08:25 PM

8. Definitely a "Mars Hill" type Christian

Basically, anything that an abusive slob identifies with = Christian (i.e. Jesus was a 'real man'). Its a remix of the trashy side of pop culture with male chauvinism and gun love.

It allows them to be more 'creative' and 'persuasive'.

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