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Fri Feb 22, 2013, 12:15 AM

Rotting Smell In Congress Traced To Decaying Senator Who Died Inside Wall

WASHINGTON—Maintenance crews inspecting the U.S. Capitol building this morning confirmed the foul-smelling odor emanating from the back of House chambers over the past two days was caused by the rotting carcass of a dead senator who got stuck inside the walls. “Looks like the poor guy crawled in there somehow and couldn’t get back out again,” custodian Bill Conwill told reporters while extracting the decaying legislator and placing the remains in a garbage bag. “There’d been complaints of something scurrying around in here chewing on the insulation for a couple weeks until the sounds suddenly stopped, then it really started to reek during a joint session of Congress. This kind of thing tends to happen once or twice a year when it gets really cold outside. They’re trying to make their way indoors and get warm, I guess.”

At press time, House Speaker John Boehner had notified the senator’s constituents of the situation and reminded members of Congress to firmly lock all doors when exiting and avoid leaving open containers of food out that could attract hungry representatives


http://www.theonion.com/articles/rotting-smell-in-congress-traced-to-decaying-senat,31395/

6 replies, 1763 views

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Reply Rotting Smell In Congress Traced To Decaying Senator Who Died Inside Wall (Original post)
octoberlib Feb 2013 OP
Cleita Feb 2013 #1
octoberlib Feb 2013 #2
tomm2thumbs Feb 2013 #3
solara Feb 2013 #4
Granny M Feb 2013 #5
Selatius Feb 2013 #6

Response to octoberlib (Original post)

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 12:24 AM

1. Hope Fox News doesn't pick this up as real news.

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Response to octoberlib (Original post)

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 12:38 AM

2. Mitch McConnell will probably demand a Senate hearing

on the matter.

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Response to octoberlib (Original post)

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 01:37 AM

3. And they thought all those flies were coming from Lindsey Graham's mouth


well, half of them anyway

the big ones

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Response to octoberlib (Original post)

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 01:46 AM

4. Terrific!

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Response to octoberlib (Original post)

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 02:54 AM

5. Probably got more done than the ones outside the walls. nt

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Response to octoberlib (Original post)

Fri Feb 22, 2013, 02:57 AM

6. Hell, half the time I can't tell if they're zombies, vampires, or Beelzebub himself in the Senate nt

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