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Tue Jan 29, 2013, 09:34 AM

A Message To Ann Coulter From A Labrador Puppy

I just do not like you.

It's hard to admit. Part of me is still trying to deny it. But it's true. Honestly, I can think about any single other person on this planet, and I just want to run around their ankles yipping at them happily and then lick their hands and nibble them with my cute little needle-sharp teeth. But somehow you are just not doing it for me.

Do you understand how bad this is? I am the most popular type of dog in the United States, because I'm never supposed to find a single thing wrong with people. Tens of thousands of years of breeding are working inside my adorable head trying to make me overlook your awfulness, so you can scratch my ear and give me a snausage. And then I just... I just look at that stupid, mean smirk on your face, and I want to take you down like prey, Discovery Channel-style. Really. Just watching you open your yap on Fox News makes me feel like a failure.

Is it because of those hideous things you've said about Muslims? Or the way you made fun of those 9/11 widows? Or... God, I don't want to do the list. Everyone already knows the list. Here's the latest. You wrote it in a paint-by-numbers piece against gun control:

Expect to hear a lot about Republicans preferring "the gun lobby" to "children." (Which is evidently not at all like preferring the teachers lobby to children.)

I think socked feet are creatures that burrow inside shoes, but your words break my brain...

READ THE REST (AND SEE THE PICTURE OF THE PUPPY, WHO IS CUTE, AND I POSTED IT BECAUSE THE INTERNET DOES NOT REWARD SHAME) HERE:
http://paulbibeau.blogspot.com/2013/01/a-message-to-ann-coulter-from-labrador.html

4 replies, 1038 views

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Arrow 4 replies Author Time Post
Reply A Message To Ann Coulter From A Labrador Puppy (Original post)
paulbibeau Jan 2013 OP
sinkingfeeling Jan 2013 #1
Scuba Jan 2013 #3
Helen Reddy Jan 2013 #2
Laura PourMeADrink Jan 2013 #4

Response to paulbibeau (Original post)

Tue Jan 29, 2013, 09:38 AM

1. Here's the puppy who wrote the letter.

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Response to sinkingfeeling (Reply #1)

Tue Jan 29, 2013, 10:00 AM

3. Most excellent awwwww.

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Response to paulbibeau (Original post)

Tue Jan 29, 2013, 09:51 AM

2. Certainly is a wise

 

little puppy breath we have here.

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Response to paulbibeau (Original post)

Tue Jan 29, 2013, 10:07 AM

4. That dog had better be careful after speaking out

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