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Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:05 PM

Slut shaming - I think it comes from the same culture as date rape

Both assume that it is every man's right to have sex with any woman, whether she is willing or not. In all too many cases, the man walks away with nothing except maybe the congratulations of his friends, while the woman bears all the consequences and shame.

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Arrow 21 replies Author Time Post
Reply Slut shaming - I think it comes from the same culture as date rape (Original post)
hedgehog Jan 2013 OP
gollygee Jan 2013 #1
Warpy Jan 2013 #2
gollygee Jan 2013 #3
yardwork Jan 2013 #5
In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #4
hedgehog Jan 2013 #6
In_The_Wind Jan 2013 #7
snooper2 Jan 2013 #8
FreeState Jan 2013 #10
VenusRising Jan 2013 #9
DogPawsBiscuitsNGrav Jan 2013 #11
davidn3600 Jan 2013 #12
redqueen Jan 2013 #13
gollygee Jan 2013 #14
FreeState Jan 2013 #16
gollygee Jan 2013 #17
redqueen Jan 2013 #18
hedgehog Jan 2013 #15
redqueen Jan 2013 #19
redqueen Jan 2013 #20
davidn3600 Jan 2013 #21

Response to hedgehog (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:07 PM

1. It's absolutely related

If you look at these teen gang rape situations, it's all about slut shaming. If you look at the tweets and videos from these kids in Steubenville, it's all slut shaming. And "slut" can refer to any woman/girl someone doesn't like, regardless of sexual history.

Edit: and I should add that it is wrong regardless of her sexual history. AND (I have a lot to say on this kind of thing) they are perfectly fine with their own sexual histories, which apparently include a bunch of rapes by their own bragging, but then label girls as "sluts" as if the girls are the ones who are shameful.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #1)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:10 PM

2. All misogyny does, from antiabortion ranting to outright rape

All of them eradicate a woman as a human being with rights of her own.

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Response to Warpy (Reply #2)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:10 PM

3. +1000000 n/t

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Response to gollygee (Reply #1)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:14 PM

5. Yes. They are proud to call themselves the Rape Crew.

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Response to hedgehog (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:13 PM

4. I have never heard of slut shaming before now.

It is disgusting for any man to feel that way.



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Response to In_The_Wind (Reply #4)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:20 PM

6. From what I can make out - many women are as involved in slut shaming as men.

I think many times it is used to define who is in the group and who is merely used by the males in the group.

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Response to hedgehog (Reply #6)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:31 PM

7. I am aware that some women can be cruel.

I've seen same sex abuse.

I believe when a crime is committed . . . everyone who was had knowledge of the intent beforehand should be charged with conspiracy to commit a crime.

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Response to hedgehog (Original post)


Response to snooper2 (Reply #8)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:38 PM

10. I dont think STDs should be used to shame anyone

that didnt work out to well with HIV and it does not work out well for other STDs.

By the way, one does not have to be sexually open to get herpes.

http://www.hhs.gov/opa/reproductive-health/stis/herpes/

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Response to hedgehog (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:37 PM

9. Yes, girls are part of slut-shaming, too.

I know the Daily Mail is nothing more than a gossip rag, but they are reporting on Slut shaming by girls.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2257975/Alarming-trend-teenaged-girls-shame-peers-dressing-slutty-wearing-make-up.html

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Response to hedgehog (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:47 PM

11. I think it's used as a derogitory term all the way around. Even used for someone

 

who hasn't had sex. Girls are much more sexually active now, probably more so than boys, but I have no stats to prove that, just guessing. Most boys don't really care how many partners a girl's had when it comes to dating. I think they're much more open minded about those things today.

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Response to hedgehog (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:51 PM

12. Women are more of an issue with that than men

Most men are not going to care about a woman's sexual history unless the guy is highly religious or something like that. Heck, what normal male wouldnt want a relationship with a woman with a high sex drive?

But when women come into conflict with each other. Sex tends to often be a point of attack. And I've personally witnessed how vicious it can be.

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Response to hedgehog (Original post)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:55 PM

13. It's not "slut shaming", it's woman hating.

There’s no such thing as a slut.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #13)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 05:58 PM

14. The term "slut"

means "woman that person doesn't like" or "woman who upset that person" or "woman who turned that person down for a date", but it doesn't have anything to do with sexual behavior. They use it simply as a slur against women.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #14)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 06:05 PM

16. That is not the definition of slut

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/slut

a. A person, especially a woman, considered sexually promiscuous.
b. A woman prostitute.


http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/slut

a : a promiscuous woman; especially : prostitute
b : a saucy girl : minx


http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/slut
Word story
Slut first appeared in the written language in 1402, according to the Oxford English Dictionary , that great repository of language information. At that time, slut meant roughly what one sense of slattern means today: a slovenly, untidy woman or girl. It also apparently meant “kitchen maid” (”She is a cheerful slut who keeps the pots scrubbed and the fires hot.”). By the end of the 15th century the sense “a woman given to immoral or improper conduct” had come into use, and it is the only meaning in use today. Interestingly, the same second meaning, a promiscuous woman, developed for the term slattern.

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Response to FreeState (Reply #16)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 06:13 PM

17. What I'm saying is that people use the word for any woman they are upset with

They don't reserve it for women they consider to be promiscuous. Or maybe they define "promiscuous" as "any woman who displays any sexuality at all." Though I think that would even be too limiting for how the word is used. It seems like those who use the word just generally shame women by calling them sluts and whores because attacking women through their sexuality is effective.

Really though I'm not disagreeing with you. I just know that people will label absolutely any woman or girl a slut, and also that the standard for "promiscuous" is ridiculous and irrelevant.

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Response to gollygee (Reply #14)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 06:14 PM

18. Yep.

The term isn't simply used to shame sluts’. It’s used to promote misogyny.

Women get called bitches regardless of our behaviour. Do we go around telling people not to ‘bitch-shame’ us? No, we say that people who call people bitches are sexist assholes.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #13)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 06:04 PM

15. I agree, but was using the term in common use to describe the action -

the shaming part, not the girl daring to have sex part!

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Response to hedgehog (Reply #15)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 06:18 PM

19. Yeah, I just like reiterating that when I get the chance.



When all that "this slut votes" crap was going on I realized how much damage women were doing by trying to reclaim the word, buying into the divisive and hateful idea of it.

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Response to hedgehog (Reply #15)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 06:34 PM

20. Also, the idea that women and girls are worse about it or engage in it more is incorrect.

The fact is that both the shaming and date rape do come from the same kind of culture.

Rape culture. Patriarchy. Girls are raised in a society that hates women, so of course they are likely to grow up with internalized self hatred (internalized misogyny) and engage in this divisive virgin/whore shit, too. Not exactly rocket science.


Also also, the ad that Google found most appropriate to run based on the keywords on this page after I added that last edit? Asian Beauties.

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Response to redqueen (Reply #20)

Mon Jan 7, 2013, 07:03 PM

21. So men are the reason women call each other a slut?

Typically women do this because of their own jealousy and insecurities. It's not any different than bullying. You got to put someone else down in order to feel better about yourself. That's the cause of it.

A girl that hangs out a lot around guys and has a lot of guy friends (even if she isn't having sex with them) will be mocked and insulted by fellow women....not men. And why is it done? Because those girls are jealous that another girl is getting attention from boys.

And that's how the drama starts.

Jealousy is a human emotion...it has nothing to do with patriarchy.

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