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Thu Dec 20, 2012, 01:57 PM

On Newtown, bullying, and DU...a thread for the bullied ("Here There Be Monsters")

This is not about Newtown...not specifically, anyway.

We've all seen the picture of the Newtown killer. We've all heard and read the news reports on the nature of the man behind the gun. Loner. Loser. Disturbed. Alone.

I think, very quietly, a lot of DUers have endured a grueling stomach-clench as all this has unfolded...because we look at that picture of the shooter, learn his story, and know that - save for his wretched decision to slaughter - we have been where he was. I've seen a number of posters allude to this without spelling it out...and why would they? It's a hell of a thing to bare your throat. Been there, done that, got the scars.

This is not intended to excuse his actions in any way, shape, or form. Not to put too fine a point on it, but fuck him.

That being said, I wrote this, and posted it here in February of 2008:

Here There Be Monsters
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x7669873

The important part is not the article itself, but the responses to it, and the resulting conversation. The sharing of similar experiences. The welcome recognition that we who know about this separate, separated, savage existence are not, in fact, alone. On DU, we are actually surrounded...and in very good company.

If you got a clot in your core over this horror because you know that person, because it was/is you, please read the link I posted...ESPECIALLY the conversation in the comments.

You are not alone.

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Reply On Newtown, bullying, and DU...a thread for the bullied ("Here There Be Monsters") (Original post)
WilliamPitt Dec 2012 OP
DissidentVoice Dec 2012 #1
Nay Dec 2012 #2
WilliamPitt Dec 2012 #3
Nay Dec 2012 #6
WilliamPitt Dec 2012 #7
Sekhmets Daughter Dec 2012 #8
99Forever Dec 2012 #4
WillyT Dec 2012 #5
sakabatou Dec 2012 #9
Sekhmets Daughter Dec 2012 #10
LineNew Reply .
WilliamPitt Dec 2012 #11

Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 02:13 PM

1. Bullied...

I suffer from PTSD today as a result of childhood abuse, a big part of which was being bullied.

Back in the '70s/'80s bullying at my schools was treated as "just ignore it" and "get over it" by the "authorities," especially when the bullies came from "good (wealthy) families" and I was a punk from the bad side of town.

My grade school "solved" playground bullying by putting boxing gloves on the antagonists and letting them pummel the hell out of each other in the school gym while the school nurse watched.

Not everyone who was bullied grows up to be a Newtown or Columbine-type killer, thank God.

There has to be more active intervention when bullying is noticed.

I would say that mental health services need to be more involved, but unfortunately the Republican party has decreed that it is not a "right" for everyone to have access to health care. It's getting better, but the services I needed were too expensive for my parents way back when.

It's easier to raise a child than to repair an adult.

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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 02:42 PM

2. As a nonentity in HS, I could understand the rage of some shooters. But Adam Lanza hadn't gone

to school for years. And when he chose a school, he didn't shoot up bullies -- he shot kindergartners. I just don't think the 'bullied' meme works here. Why not shoot up the last HS he went to, if bullies were his focus?

Personally, I think he felt MORE isolated and despairing at home than he ever felt while he was going to school. I think his mother's 'economic collapse' fears worked on his mind, and when he found out mom was going to be committing him to a mental institution, well, that was it. That was the trigger.

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Response to Nay (Reply #2)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 02:44 PM

3. Being a loner doesn't end when you graduate.

Being tagged a "loser" doesn't either.

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Response to WilliamPitt (Reply #3)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 04:13 PM

6. Very true - but that still doesn't explain why he shot kindergartners rather than, say, the HS

kids he hated in the HS he went to. The little kindergartners, frankly, would have been the most accepting of him when he was in kindergarten. I guess I just don't see the connection, unless he was just jealous of normal little ones enjoying the beginning of their lives, little ones that he might have imagined his mother enjoying rather than the son she got. It was all in his head, I'm sure, but I'm just trying to figure out why that school, why little peeps.

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Response to Nay (Reply #6)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 04:23 PM

7. I can't answer that.

I don't imagine anyone ever will.

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Response to Nay (Reply #6)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 04:56 PM

8. Perhaps his goal was to inflict the most pain possible.

Their very innocence would make this pain almost unbearable. Or perhaps, they represented the age at which his own torment began.

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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 02:53 PM

4. Thank you Mr Pitt.

so very important.

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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 03:17 PM

5. K & R !!!


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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 04:57 PM

9. I was bullied in the class

I don't remember the reason, but I mostly shook it off when I got older.

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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 05:09 PM

10. A great post, and much needed here.

Thanks for re-posting it.

Bullies are created not born and the one thing they all have in common is cowardice. I think, as a society, we would be better served if we insisted on "parenting" classes for the parents of bullies and family counseling.

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Response to WilliamPitt (Original post)

Thu Dec 20, 2012, 07:31 PM

11. .

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