HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Main » General Discussion (Forum) » I am 'mentally ill'.
Introducing Discussionist: A new forum by the creators of DU

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 05:47 AM

I am 'mentally ill'.


I have dealt with depression for 40 years. This includes 2 major episodes when I signed myself in to get help I knew I needed. I have never felt the urge to hurt anyone but myself.

I will not get a gun because even though I have a handle on it now, if I was to drop into a black hole it is too easy to end everything before any steps to help are taken. Logically I know that I can recover. However, that is overridden by the massive dark cloud that interrupts every part of life. I do not believe anything will help.

If I tell some people that I do deal with depression, I am viewed with side eyes. I know that many are uncomfortable and that some wonder if I am going to suddenly erupt into some homicidal tornado.

Many people do not make distinctions. I have to be careful if I decide to confide in anyone. It is a burden for those who try to help. When I need someone to talk to, my cats psychoanalyze me many times.

This is what society and our system of mental health have created. People who need help that could ease problems before they curl up into nothing are shit out of luck. Many just suffer in silence for what can seem like eternity. Others who have major problems are never given the help they need or cannot be dealt with in a humane way that keeps them from harming others.

It is beyond shameful. Please consider all the ramifications of dealing with the 'mentally ill'. It is a catchall term that traps people in a type of limbo or outcast group for a long time.

Crazy Grits

10 replies, 1411 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 10 replies Author Time Post
Reply I am 'mentally ill'. (Original post)
Are_grits_groceries Dec 2012 OP
Victor_c3 Dec 2012 #1
leftyladyfrommo Dec 2012 #2
safeinOhio Dec 2012 #3
marions ghost Dec 2012 #4
safeinOhio Dec 2012 #6
Are_grits_groceries Dec 2012 #7
malaise Dec 2012 #5
Historic NY Dec 2012 #8
vlyons Dec 2012 #9
truebluegreen Dec 2012 #10

Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 06:24 AM

1. Nope, most people don't get it

Most people think that mental illness and depression are that you're just really sad. Its more than that and, unless you've been through it yourself or you have a loved one who has, it's really hard for most people to understand.

I've got my own issues that I seek help for (PTSD and depression) and my wife is diagnosed bipolar. I really do get what you are saying.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 06:31 AM

2. I've had issues all of my life.

I would never hurt anyone - not even me.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 07:31 AM

3. Those with anger issues, more than depression may not want to own guns.

If you have ever hit a person when you were angry, have had a problem because of jealousy, find yourself in heated arguments often or find yourself seeking revenge against someone that has done you wrong. Don't own a gun. I think almost everyone of the recent shooting involved a person with some sort of anger problem. As depression is sometimes attributed to anger turned inward, that may also be a signal.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to safeinOhio (Reply #3)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 08:07 AM

4. good point

Anger issues are very often ignored. "Don't own a gun" is excellent advice. Often those who are unable to control anger have guns to reinforce their ideas of justice. Those who trigger their rage, beware.

It is possible to learn how to control anger & get treatment --not easy but worth it. A lot of people never do and live their whole lives not knowing how to make peace within themselves. But I have seen some who get there. Usually they develop positive outlets for their volcanic energy and learn how to express anger instead of bottling up. They recognize the need for a conscious change. Support groups are a big help. If anyone reading this knows they have such a problem, do something about it now. Don't wait. You are not alone. You may have good reasons to feel angry--we all do. (It's not limited to men either). You can get a handle on your emotions and learn more positive ways of coping. Just do it. You know who you are.

Christmas--doing some Xmas shopping and trying to function in the horrendous amounts of traffic the holiday generates, I see plenty of people whose anger is not under control. A woman screamed and shook her fist at me when I didn't move up quite close enough to other cars at a stoplight. I saw people rudely knocking against a fragile old man trying to navigate a busy food section of a mall. A server in a busy coffee shop was taking out her anger on customers in a nasty, sarcastic, passive-aggressive way. You see it everywhere in this period just before Christmas. Supposedly the time of love and good cheer--but a lot of people reserve that only for their own families and are rude and hostile to others. There are people who really thrive on taking their issues out on others. They are some of the most unhappy souls in the world.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to marions ghost (Reply #4)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 08:12 AM

6. That reminds me to add to the list.

If you have ever flipped off another driver, responded to another angry driver or used your car to make a point.

It is easy to learn to let things go and it's better for your health.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to safeinOhio (Reply #3)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 08:39 AM

7. I remember what the psychiatrist on M*A*S*H said to Hawkeye.

This is a paraphrase.
'Anger turned outwards is rage.
Anger turned inwards is depression.
Anger turned sideways is laughter'

I try to turn it sideways. If even some of it is deflected, it helps.
That character on M*A*S*H is one of my favorites even though he was only on here and there.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 08:12 AM

5. You are one great human being

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 08:58 AM

8. We never got past lumping everything together remember Tom Eagleton.......

unfortunately your right our system, is stuck somewhere between the 18th & 19th century bias.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 09:18 AM

9. I also have suffered from depression

For years, I self-medicated with booze, which made it worse actually. I was a functioning alcoholic. As soon as I got home from work, into the kitchen for the first on many highballs in a giant iced tea glass. Now I don't drink booze. I don't like the way it makes me feel.

Depression is a tough nut to crack. There is help out there, assuming you have health insurance that covers mental wellness. Depression is a physical ailment, not just a mental ailment. Diet, exercise, and plenty of water throughout the day can help, provided one is not so far down the black hole that getting out of bed, off the couch, etc. becomes almost impossible. Any depressed person who manages the struggle to achieve some mental wellness is really very courageous. If you are depressed, or know someone who is, please please continually reinforce the idea that you, or they, are SOMEBODY. Somebody who counts, somebody with value, somebody who actually adds value.

A sense of worthlessness, loneliness, and helplessness was at the root of much of my depression. Plus I grew up in a dysfunctional family with parents, who had piss poor social skills. No one taught me how to make friends. Indeed I was taught that Mother was my only real friend and distrust everyone else. How sick is that? I realize now that she was probably very depressed also.

I'm ok now. I know that I am somebody. I'm not afraid of failure. Failure is an honored teacher.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to Are_grits_groceries (Original post)

Sun Dec 16, 2012, 11:43 AM

10. I too have suffered from mental illness, in my case depression.

So have other members of my family, immediate and extended, mental illness in various forms. Some of us have harmed ourselves, none of us have harmed others.

And one thing I know is that the mentally-ill are no more likely than the general population to harm others. Statistically probably less.

Another thing I know is that I miss my brother--schizophrenic, gentle, kind, and simply the nicest person I ever knew. He never had a bad word to say about anyone. Things could irritate him, but I never saw him angry at anyone, and although his life was constrained by his malady he never felt a lack. He accepted and dealt cheerfully with every thing that came his way.

He died a few years ago from heart failure, at the age of 53. Complications from lupus, really.

I'll miss him forever.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread