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Sun Dec 9, 2012, 04:13 PM

BILLIONAIRES WARN HIGHER TAXES COULD PREVENT THEM FROM BUYING POLITICIANS Posted by Andy Borowitz

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Introducing a new wrinkle into the already fraught fiscal cliff showdown, a consortium of billionaires today warned that if their taxes are raised they will no longer have enough money to buy politicians.

While the American family has seen increases in the cost of food, health care and education, Mr. Adelson says, “those costs don’t compare with the cost of buying a politician, which has gone through the roof.”

Adding insult to injury for America’s billionaires, he says, “the simple dream of someday owning a President is slipping out of reach.”

“People think a billion dollars buys you a President, but they’re wrong,” he says. “It barely gets you a lemon like Mitt Romney.”


Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/borowitzreport/2012/12/billionaires-warn-higher-taxes-could-prevent-them-from-buying-politicians.html#ixzz2EajbsU8N


11 replies, 2468 views

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Reply BILLIONAIRES WARN HIGHER TAXES COULD PREVENT THEM FROM BUYING POLITICIANS Posted by Andy Borowitz (Original post)
magical thyme Dec 2012 OP
libodem Dec 2012 #1
gateley Dec 2012 #2
freshwest Dec 2012 #10
sheshe2 Dec 2012 #11
LisaLynne Dec 2012 #3
parisordi Dec 2012 #4
Omaha Steve Dec 2012 #5
calimary Dec 2012 #6
dorksied Dec 2012 #7
savebigbird Dec 2012 #8
hue Dec 2012 #9

Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 04:36 PM

1. Tragic

Let me start by saying boo fucking hoo.

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 04:48 PM

2. *snort*

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Response to gateley (Reply #2)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 07:01 PM

10. Also!

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Response to freshwest (Reply #10)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 10:05 PM

11. Those poor billionaires..

Poor Poor Pitiful Me!

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 04:57 PM

3. And those Mitts lose all their resale value as soon as you drive them off the lot.

:/

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 06:05 PM

5. Marta is putting this on a T shirt


K&R!

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 06:27 PM

6. I FREAKIN' LOVE Andy Borowitz!!!

This is another GREAT one!!! Thank you for posting, magical thyme!

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 06:41 PM

7. Is this legit or satire? I'm sorry if I seem obtuse, but I'm unfamiliar with Mr. Borowitz.

Did the billionaires really say this?

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 06:51 PM

8. Is that a threat...

...or a promise?!?

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Response to magical thyme (Original post)

Sun Dec 9, 2012, 06:51 PM

9. Awesome!!

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