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Wed Dec 5, 2012, 05:48 PM

To have this be a legal marriage means everything to both of us




West Seattle women to be first same-sex couple to get a marriage license in King County
http://westseattle.komonews.com/news/people/805019-west-seattle-women-be-first-same-sex-couple-get-marriage-license-king-county

Just after midnight tonight, two West Seattle women will be the first same-sex couple in King County to receive a marriage license since our state legalized gay marriage.

Jane Abbott Lighty and Pete-e Petersen of West Seattle have been together 35 years, and were featured in a Referendum 74 ad (see video above), according to a press release from King County Executive Dow Constantine.



Petersen, 85, was born in Manhattan but grew up in a small Alabama town with her grandmother. She served five years in the Air Force as air-evac flight nurse during the Korean War. Petersen adopted her sister's daughter at almost three years old.

Lighty, 77, was born in Fremont, Neb. but mostly grew up in the San Francisco Bay Area. She was also a nurse.



The couple had a commitment ceremony years ago but say a domestic partnership just isn’t the same as a marriage.

"To have our 35 year loving relationship publicly honored and celebrated and have this be a legal marriage means everything to both of us," said Lighty




I am so damn proud of my state and even the red-leaning county where I reside. Washington state voted 54% in favor of marriage equality last month and in my neck of the woods, R-74 passed with 50% of the vote.

Here's another article on preparations for marriage license applications:
http://www.goskagit.com/all_access/county-auditor-readies-for-same-sex-marriage-applications/article_dcbab30b-61d6-5a89-b6b6-3ff7a95c3860.html



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Arrow 21 replies Author Time Post
Reply To have this be a legal marriage means everything to both of us (Original post)
countryjake Dec 2012 OP
peacebird Dec 2012 #1
niyad Dec 2012 #2
countryjake Dec 2012 #15
RC Dec 2012 #3
AlecBGreen Dec 2012 #5
Lars39 Dec 2012 #6
AlecBGreen Dec 2012 #7
Lars39 Dec 2012 #8
RC Dec 2012 #9
Lars39 Dec 2012 #10
AlecBGreen Dec 2012 #12
Lars39 Dec 2012 #13
countryjake Dec 2012 #14
AlecBGreen Dec 2012 #16
countryjake Dec 2012 #17
Science Geek Dec 2012 #20
AlecBGreen Dec 2012 #21
progressoid Dec 2012 #4
Zorra Dec 2012 #11
suffragette Dec 2012 #18
Hekate Dec 2012 #19

Response to countryjake (Original post)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 05:50 PM

1. Wonderful!!!

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Response to countryjake (Original post)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 05:59 PM

2. how wonderful--but how sad that this is still such an issue so many places. we should celebrate

love and commitment.

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Response to niyad (Reply #2)

Thu Dec 6, 2012, 06:41 AM

15. So true, it is sad, but wa state is full of celebration today...

the massive lines of couples waiting to get their licenses last night was incredible!

One of our local channels broke in to regular programming right before midnight to show the countdown and then the two little women highlighted in my OP stepped forward to receive what they should have been able to get 35 years ago, when they first fell in love and made their commitment to one another. It was a glorious moment to see.

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Response to countryjake (Original post)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 06:07 PM

3. What is wrong with being allowed to marry your best friend?

 

Marriage is a legal contract. All kind of other contracts are legal. Why not allow a marriage contract with your best friend, no matter the genders, be legal also?

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Response to RC (Reply #3)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 08:27 PM

5. I can share my perspective

"Marriage" is a religious term. Civil unions are another matter. If we want to talk "marriage" then that falls into the religious realm. Im not trying to parse words, just trying to be clear.

I am a liberal, Christian Democrat. The church I attend is a healthy mix of liberal and conservative Christians. My pastor is a great man and defies stereotype (you'll just have to take my word for it ) He is staunchly liberal on many issues (workers rights, social justice, environment, etc) even so he is opposed to gay marriage. Form our talks he feels that being gay is not a sin in itself, but engaging in homosexual sex is prohibited. Many of my fellow parishoners feel the same way. They recognize that being gay is not a sin, but having gay sex is. I disagree with them but I understand why they think that way.

In terms of accepting gay marriage/civil unions, I think some Christians might view it in a similar way to legalizing prostitution: you know it may have positive benefits for those involved (better treatment for women, safer, taxed, regulated, etc) but they are afraid that by doing so, they are sanctioning it as "OK" when they feel it isnt. Does that make sense?

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Response to AlecBGreen (Reply #5)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 08:42 PM

6. The marriage ceremonies your pastor performs are legal only because the state

licensed him/her to perform them. No one would force an unwilling pastor to perform a marriage ceremony.
In your world I suppose it's ok for a couple to have 4-8 marriages between them, yet deny a gay couple who has between faithful to each other for 30 years the right to be married.

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Response to Lars39 (Reply #6)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 08:55 PM

7. thanks for your reply

"The marriage ceremonies your pastor performs are legal only because the state licensed him/her to perform them." Yes, we (America) have put ourselves into a situation where we have entangled church (marriage) and state (a legally binding union). I think they should be two separate issues.

"No one would force an unwilling pastor to perform a marriage ceremony. Yes, I know that and so does our pastor.

"In your world I suppose it's ok for a couple to have 4-8 marriages between them, yet deny a gay couple who has between faithful to each other for 30 years the right to be married." In my world? Do you mean me, AlecBGreen, or my church? I personally support the right of gay couples to be joined, both in the eyes of the state (civilly) and the church (religiously). Neither my denomination, the majority of my local church nor my pastor share that opinion. Im workin on it

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Response to AlecBGreen (Reply #7)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 09:24 PM

8. I used to think that having civil unions and marriages would be the answer until

I finally realized that would be setting up a 2-tier system...and those never treat people equally. It is your world if you are going to a church that would deny gay people the right to marry.
Food for thought:
If God made "mankind"in His image as sexual beings, why would He be so cruel as to deny some of those beings the ability to act on their sexual feelings?

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Response to Lars39 (Reply #8)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 10:00 PM

9. For the same reason he would deny Heaven to those that never had a chance to hear of his son.

 

That though is what started me on the path of me being a non believer, when I six or seven years old.

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Response to RC (Reply #9)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 10:30 PM

10. A few years behind you, but same result.

Middle name "why".

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Response to Lars39 (Reply #8)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 11:24 PM

12. I disagree

"I used to think that having civil unions and marriages would be the answer until I finally realized that would be setting up a 2-tier system...and those never treat people equally."

Lets assume a hypothetical reality where gay couples could be wed civilly and have their partnership legally recognized by the state with all the benefits currently enjoyed by todays married citizens. Lets also assume that the majority of American churches would still refuse to 'marry' them in a religious ceremony, although there would be exceptions as there are today (UU, some Episcopal, some Lutheran, etc). Do you think that this system would a true 'two-tier' system that would make things worse? I think it would be a step UP from our current situation and would be the logical next step into full acceptance for our gay brothers and sisters.

"It is your world if you are going to a church that would deny gay people the right to marry." Equality & gay rights are important issues to me and it is an issue on which I disagree with many Christians. I feel that gays SHOULD be allowed to marry and not be forced into a life of celibacy. I absolutely do not think they should be denied the right to spend their life with whomever they pick. I have spoken to my close church friends and pastor about this frequently. As Dr MLK Jr said, "The moral arc of the universe is long but it bends towards justice." I see myself as part of that process.

"If God made "mankind"in His image as sexual beings, why would He be so cruel as to deny some of those beings the ability to act on their sexual feelings?" This is a question that could take up several days of thinking and writing. What it really boils down to is, does the OT commandment of "A man shall not lay down with a man, as with a woman (etc)" mean what we think it means, and if so, does that still hold true? My thought is no, it does not. While we Christians are not given license to sin however we wish, we have been told that we are no longer "under the law." That phrase and ones like it is all over Paul's letters. Ex: Romans 7:6: “But now we have been released from the Law, having died to that by which we were bound, so that we serve in newness of the Spirit and not in oldness of the letter.”

Anyway, I could talk about this all night but its late and I have work and I just got done grinding up a whole hog leg (ha! there's another OT commandment we seem to ignore ) Anyway feel free to respond if you wanna keep talking about this. Its a subject that is very important to me. Gnight!

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Response to AlecBGreen (Reply #12)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 11:31 PM

13. Given the near theocratic status of many red states,

Giving more rights to those married in a church would absolutely happen.

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Response to AlecBGreen (Reply #7)

Thu Dec 6, 2012, 12:33 AM

14. Here are a couple of links...

that you might find useful to help in your discussions with your church people:

Making history: Seattle First Baptist Church, uniting Gay couples for 33 years, plans free December 9 ceremony
http://www.sgn.org/sgnnews40_48/page44.cfm

Group Wedding at Seattle church celebrates the first day for same-sex couples to legally marry
(this is a pdf. of the wedding announcement for the Seattle First Baptist)

http://seattlefirstbaptist.org/Documents/Flyers/Group-Wedding-at-Seattle-First-Baptist-Church.pdf

There are several Unitarian Universalist churches in the state that are also planning wedding galas for this coming Sunday.

I think that as more and more hearts and minds are opened to accepting civil rights for all, those who cling to ancient mores will recognize the discriminatory nature of their tenets. I would never have believed that the backwoods rural county that I live in could get a majority to vote in favor of our referendum, but it has, and the conversations I've had with those who were formerly heatedly opposed to such a law have now become surprisingly rational. People do change. I encourage you to continue "workin' on it", you might be pleasantly surprised with the results of your efforts.

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Response to countryjake (Reply #14)

Thu Dec 6, 2012, 05:56 PM

16. thanks for the links

It is amazing to me that a Baptist church (traditionally they are quite conservative) would perform same-sex marriages. That is a step in the right direction IMO.

"People do change. I encourage you to continue "workin' on it", you might be pleasantly surprised with the results of your efforts."

I agree. When my brother came out, my mom (already liberal) became very informed and vocal on the matter within our church. My long-time childhood pastor has changed his thinking on the matter to supporting same-sex rights (and marriage AFAIK) and I think my mom may have played a role in that. If he can do it, many can.

My concern, well-founded or not, is that I support same-sex marriage for the wrong reasons. My brother is gay and I want him to be happy. That does not mean it is OK in the eyes of God. Humanity has a long history of doing what it wants and justifying it by saying "Oh yeah, this is what God wants!" Even so, I think it is better to err on the side of mercy, love and inclusion. Its a tough issue for me but one that I will not retreat from. I think gay people are deserving to enjoy all the benefits and responsibilities of marriage, both civic and sexual. As my conservative pastor taught us during confirmation, "God made sex for PROcreation and RECreation." Amen!

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Response to AlecBGreen (Reply #16)

Fri Dec 7, 2012, 01:37 AM

17. Assuring equal rights for all in this country isn't any gods concern...

and a government that might think that it actually has the power to force any of its citizens "into celibacy" or deny them a life that is secure in a loving commitment, is certainly not one that has the words "certain unalienable Rights" or "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness" in its founding documents.

The USA defines law by what is laid out in our Constitution and determining rights should never be conditional on some supernatural approval, whether some citizens might believe otherwise or not. We are fighting for marriage equality in our nation here, not some church's canon, creed, or biblical text to be deciphered; if those whose religions condone and justify discrimination are finding it a spiritual struggle to deal with, then I honestly think it's high time for another reformation within those faiths.

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Response to AlecBGreen (Reply #5)

Fri Dec 7, 2012, 03:14 AM

20. How do you feel about atheists marrying?

.

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Response to Science Geek (Reply #20)

Fri Dec 7, 2012, 05:43 PM

21. it depends on how you define marriage

If they (two atheists) want to be united in the eyes of the state, thats fine by me. Thats a civil union. If they want to have a traditional 'marriage' where they have a ceremony and party and honeymoon, white dress & cake, etc, thats fine by me. If they want a pastor to do it and invoke the name of God in the ceremony, that strikes me as odd. In that sense, I think its wrong.

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Response to countryjake (Original post)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 08:15 PM

4. Rec.

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Response to countryjake (Original post)

Wed Dec 5, 2012, 10:57 PM

11. K&R nt

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Response to countryjake (Original post)

Fri Dec 7, 2012, 01:50 AM

18. K&R

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Response to countryjake (Original post)

Fri Dec 7, 2012, 03:13 AM

19. I love weddings.

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