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Sat Dec 1, 2012, 05:47 PM

Romney starts over

Romney starting over from the beginning.

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"If I did it once I can do it again" said a somewhat disheveled and pathetic Romney at his new job. His wife Ann was inside behind the counter quietly crying, telling customers to eat cake and slipping 20's into her bra. The floor was littered with torn up home redecorating magazines and pictures of Michelle Obama. She fired up a cigarette beneath the "No smoking" sign and gave the finger to her huckster husband outside.

Mitt's sons, Tab, Biff and Powie pulled in one by one in their Euro-trash sports cars and made dad give them a fill-up while they laughed and brandished money to impress the hookers they had riding shotgun. No one went in to see Ann. They knew better. An old friend watched silently at the pathos. As the son's squealed away, Romney began dousing himself with fuel.

"Uh, Mitt? the friend said carefully, "Don't be so hard on yourself. You never really started like this. Your Dad gave you a million bucks and his friends gave you a leg up. You just were good at destroying perfectly good companies and filling your pockets. It's OK you lost the election and can't even pump gas competently."

Mitt looked up, his face full of sorrow and wet with gasoline and newly diluted grease from the oily pomade that used to slick back his heavily dyed hair. "You think maybe I don't need to immolate myself?"

"That's right, Mitt, you're just a chiseling rich bastard like me, nothing wrong with that," his friend said earnestly.

The front door of the convenience mart opened and Ann walked out, obviously shaken and irritable from drinking a case of 5 hour energy and downing a rack of Krispy Kremes. She had a lit cigarette in her mouth and removed it slowly, eying the two friends who began backing away. ""You got that insurance paid up Mitty?" she said holding the butt in flick position in her trembling hands.

"No" said Mitt shakily. "Liar" she said flatly, "I paid it myself this morning." The cigarette took flight.

12 replies, 1536 views

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Arrow 12 replies Author Time Post
Reply Romney starts over (Original post)
Bozvotros Dec 2012 OP
dommyluc Dec 2012 #1
russspeakeasy Dec 2012 #2
dgauss Dec 2012 #3
dixiegrrrrl Dec 2012 #4
Bozvotros Dec 2012 #6
lastlib Dec 2012 #5
malaise Dec 2012 #7
Kahuna Dec 2012 #8
dmr Dec 2012 #9
CountAllVotes Dec 2012 #10
Raine Dec 2012 #11
onethatcares Dec 2012 #12

Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 06:03 PM

1. Thank You, Bosvotros!

After reading that stomach-turning piece of Romney-ass-kissing fluff(ing) by Philip Rucker in the WP, this was a well-needed antidote.
I wonder if Mr. Rucker needed as much drugs to write his piece of journalistic malpractice as I needed to read it?

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 06:06 PM

2. Thanks...

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 06:08 PM

3. Now that was some good writing.

I think you really captured the essence of Tab, Biff and Powie. And that's just the way I would picture Ann flicking a lit cigarette at a gasoline drenched Romney.

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 06:12 PM

4. Wish I could give it more than one rec. A thing of beauty!

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Response to dixiegrrrrl (Reply #4)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 07:52 PM

6. You are too kind.

Thanks. It just kind of flowed out. I am amazed at how much I came to detest the whole Romney clan.

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 06:33 PM

5. That'd be just like Ann...to flick a lighted cigarette at a gas pump....

"Massive Explosion at Filling Station Kills Romneys, Others." Video at 11.....


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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 08:11 PM

7. Oh my!

Brilliant

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sat Dec 1, 2012, 09:42 PM

8. I can only add..

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sun Dec 2, 2012, 03:18 AM

9. Thanks! The cigarette took flight.

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sun Dec 2, 2012, 03:29 AM

10. Mitt's sons, Tab, Biff and Powie

Boy, talk about creative names, these are a few of them.

No wonder Mitt looks disheveled!

Great piece of writing there!!



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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sun Dec 2, 2012, 03:45 AM

11. Good one ... THANKS! nt

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Response to Bozvotros (Original post)

Sun Dec 2, 2012, 05:44 AM

12. you been channelling

some of the Hunter???? Maybe???

Good work.

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