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Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:17 PM

 

What Republicans think is happening now.

Thank goodness! All our (Democrats) free stuff is now coming in! Got my stack of $100's, a $5K prepaid Visa card and a copy of the Communist Manifesto, The Quoran, Bill Ayers Biography, The secrets surrounding Benghazi and how it was really Obama that arraigned the attack and instructions on how to turn all my white neighbors gay and then force them into having abortions.

Also included in this first package of free stuff (secretly paid for by attaching the funds from middle class republican's bank accounts) was a dictionary to make sure we don't end up looking as stupid as the teabaggers when making protest signs. YAY!

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Arrow 92 replies Author Time Post
Reply What Republicans think is happening now. (Original post)
Whovian Nov 2012 OP
flamingdem Nov 2012 #1
Whovian Nov 2012 #2
Indpndnt Nov 2012 #19
yardwork Nov 2012 #66
theKed Nov 2012 #73
Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #77
Heather MC Nov 2012 #26
flamingdem Nov 2012 #41
R. Daneel Olivaw Nov 2012 #76
CaliforniaPeggy Nov 2012 #3
vilify Nov 2012 #4
yardwork Nov 2012 #5
Jazzgirl Nov 2012 #34
dchill Nov 2012 #42
Volaris Nov 2012 #57
Indpndnt Nov 2012 #69
Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #78
eridani Nov 2012 #84
Manifestor_of_Light Nov 2012 #92
DURHAM D Nov 2012 #68
yardwork Nov 2012 #70
Jackpine Radical Nov 2012 #86
rbrnmw Nov 2012 #6
babylonsister Nov 2012 #7
n2doc Nov 2012 #24
Fantastic Anarchist Nov 2012 #44
Kennah Nov 2012 #82
rbrnmw Nov 2012 #87
SoCalMusicLover Nov 2012 #8
hifiguy Nov 2012 #15
Shrike47 Nov 2012 #29
Skittles Nov 2012 #53
mimi85 Nov 2012 #56
bluestate10 Nov 2012 #9
Indpndnt Nov 2012 #20
liberalmuse Nov 2012 #10
pokerfan Nov 2012 #17
PennsylvaniaMatt Nov 2012 #11
Whovian Nov 2012 #12
PennsylvaniaMatt Nov 2012 #21
longship Nov 2012 #13
kydo Nov 2012 #14
BuelahWitch Nov 2012 #18
sarcasmo Nov 2012 #31
yurbud Nov 2012 #16
theKed Nov 2012 #74
corneliamcgillicutty Nov 2012 #22
2naSalit Nov 2012 #32
proud2BlibKansan Nov 2012 #23
Cleita Nov 2012 #25
mckara Nov 2012 #27
quakerboy Nov 2012 #28
2naSalit Nov 2012 #33
Volaris Nov 2012 #58
sarcasmo Nov 2012 #30
xfundy Nov 2012 #35
PBass Nov 2012 #36
ErikJ Nov 2012 #37
RoccoR5955 Nov 2012 #38
The Old Creak Nov 2012 #39
Fantastic Anarchist Nov 2012 #40
KatyaR Nov 2012 #43
Liberalagogo Nov 2012 #45
Ruby the Liberal Nov 2012 #46
Megahurtz Nov 2012 #47
Sophiegirl Nov 2012 #48
Neurotica Nov 2012 #75
Sophiegirl Nov 2012 #89
amywalk Nov 2012 #49
bluestate10 Nov 2012 #79
Honeycombe8 Nov 2012 #50
bluestate10 Nov 2012 #80
Honeycombe8 Nov 2012 #90
Arugula Latte Nov 2012 #51
rbrnmw Nov 2012 #88
Arugula Latte Nov 2012 #91
Jim Lane Nov 2012 #52
bluestate10 Nov 2012 #81
MzShellG Nov 2012 #54
Spitfire of ATJ Nov 2012 #71
JohnnyRingo Nov 2012 #55
Sedona Nov 2012 #60
JohnnyRingo Nov 2012 #67
dsharp88 Nov 2012 #59
amywalk Nov 2012 #65
struggle4progress Nov 2012 #61
JackRiddler Nov 2012 #62
Nevernose Nov 2012 #63
Ikonoklast Nov 2012 #64
tiredtoo Nov 2012 #72
Kennah Nov 2012 #83
pepperbear Nov 2012 #85

Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:20 PM

1. Where's my stuff?

Plus free subscription to tier 1 cable so I can get msnbc and follow the secretly coded commands of socialists Rachel Maddwoman and Lawrence McDonnell.

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #1)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:24 PM

2. If you didn't get it today via the socialist postal system, it should be there tomorrow.

 

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #1)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:57 PM

19. I got a ranch here in Texas. They took it from a teabagger and gave it to me.

Pretty cool, I must say. As soon as I clean up the mess where their repub heads went all over the place, I'll post pics.

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Response to Indpndnt (Reply #19)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:44 PM

66. That's that redistribution that we voted for in action! Way to go!

I can't wait to get my factory I ordered when I voted early. I picked it off the wishlist the Democrats gave me with my ballot. They're getting ready to take it away from the Republican who owned it and "redistribute it" to me.

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Response to yardwork (Reply #66)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:57 PM

73. Awww man

My commie registration catalogue didn't come with my absentee ballot.
All I got was a half-acre of unused land in Alabama and this coupon for a free abortion.

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Response to theKed (Reply #73)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 10:58 PM

77. Hope your coupon included a GENERAL anesthetic!!

It's quite a painful experience, I am told (physically).

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #1)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 06:33 PM

26. I am still waiting on my AK-47 I was raised by a single mom

I have meeting schedule with a few Mexican druglords next week, really gonna need that gun

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Response to Heather MC (Reply #26)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:30 PM

41. Holder should be able to arrange that for you

ouch just kidding!

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Response to flamingdem (Reply #1)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 10:51 PM

76. Sorry, dude. It showed up at my house, and I signed for it.


Did you want to come over an pick up the Lenin Goatees, bale of 420, and lifetime supply of tax exempt vouchers?

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:26 PM

3. LOL!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:29 PM

4. I got got my Obama phone in the mail as a thank you gift for voting straight D.

 

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:30 PM

5. Did you get your Obama phone?

Also, don't forget to teach your neighbors to sing the National Anthem in Spanish. Remember, it will be the law to sing it in Spanish by Inauguration Day. Anybody attempting to sing the National Anthem in English after that date will be jailed by Homeland Security and have all their guns confiscated.

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Response to yardwork (Reply #5)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:10 PM

34. No, no, not jailed! Executed!

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Response to Jazzgirl (Reply #34)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:30 PM

42. No one will be jailed OR executed!!

We have internment camps (thx UN!) set up for those people.

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Response to yardwork (Reply #5)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:08 PM

57. "it will be law to sing it in Spanish..."

Was that a part of the Sharia Constitution we voted for last Tuesday? I didn't know...but it's awesome. All hail Great Leader Obama, most Holy of Holies.

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Response to Volaris (Reply #57)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:10 PM

69. You know, I saw a Xmas commercial last night.

I thought we did away with Xmas. What's the deal? I'm entitled to a Xmas-free TV experience, dammit!

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Response to Indpndnt (Reply #69)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 11:00 PM

78. No, we gotta sing "Feliz Navidad" along with Jose Feliciano.

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Response to Manifestor_of_Light (Reply #78)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 12:57 AM

84. NOOOOOOOO!! Anything but that! Anything! n/t

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Response to eridani (Reply #84)

Thu Nov 15, 2012, 01:57 PM

92. Ha Ha!!!!

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Response to yardwork (Reply #5)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:08 PM

68. I wanted a Cadillac but

got a 1989 Yugo instead. It came with a note, something about socialism...

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Response to DURHAM D (Reply #68)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:24 PM

70. Really? I got a new Tesla! It must be because your county is bluer than mine.

They really needed my vote.

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Response to yardwork (Reply #5)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 08:56 AM

86. No, no, the National Anthem is no longer operative. It's the Internationale now.


LA INTERNACIONAL

Arriba, parias de la Tierra.
En pie, famélica legión.
Los proletarios gritan: Guerra!
Guerra hasta el fin de la opresión.

Borrad el rastro del pasado!
Arriba, esclavos, todos en pié!
el mundo va a cambiar de base,
los nada de hoy todo han de ser.

Agrupémonos todos,
en la lucha final.
El género humano
es la internacional.
(bis)

And "Free Beer for All the Workers" of course. That's the only patriotic ong permitted in English.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:34 PM

6. I got mine Obamaphone today too!!!!!!!

It's real slick it's a Samsung Galaxy III Wow and the $7500 prepaid visa card will come in handy, when I'm out driving my new Jeep which was part of my freebie package. I also got a $5000 a month ebt card for food.

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Response to rbrnmw (Reply #6)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:35 PM

7. Hahaha! I'm waiting for mine... nt

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Response to rbrnmw (Reply #6)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 06:16 PM

24. That's a Chinese-made Jeep, right?

Had my free health care today, including Shiatzu massage, choice of drugs, and porn videos (GLBT, of course).

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Response to n2doc (Reply #24)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:32 PM

44. My girlfriend got her first abortion-on-demand today!

I was there, and it was a beautiful experience. We're planning on having many more!

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Response to n2doc (Reply #24)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 12:48 AM

82. They told me my Jeep is en route to China

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Response to n2doc (Reply #24)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 06:19 PM

87. Well of course it is nt

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:35 PM

8. Phones Are Cool, But Where Is My Damn Pony?

I was promised a Pony, and all I got was legalized pot.

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Response to SoCalMusicLover (Reply #8)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:50 PM

15. Ponies can be found at this site:

http://www.equestriadaily.com/

Notify the appropriate people at Obama For America with your specific Pony request.

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Response to hifiguy (Reply #15)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:02 PM

29. I want the Black Stallion.

We'll ride fast as the wind!

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Response to SoCalMusicLover (Reply #8)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:58 PM

53. ponies aren't just SENT

you have to specify size, color, and # of tricks it can perform........SHEESH

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Response to SoCalMusicLover (Reply #8)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:04 PM

56. Love it!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:37 PM

9. You got your free stuff? Where is my free stuff? I demand it, along with more free stuff because I

didn't get my free stuff on time!!!

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Response to bluestate10 (Reply #9)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:58 PM

20. You get a bonus because it's late! Yet another Visa card.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:37 PM

10. In Washington State...

we get to enroll in the "Weed 'O the Month" club. We also get bonus stamps for our commie catalogue coupon books if we choose to get gay married by a Rastafarian.

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Response to liberalmuse (Reply #10)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:51 PM

17. That's the gift that keeps on

giving throughout the entire year...

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:42 PM

11. Question?

Do I get a discount on a Prius at my local Toyota dealer now!?

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Response to PennsylvaniaMatt (Reply #11)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:44 PM

12. Wait a it. There will be one with a big bow on it in your driveway shortly.

 

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Response to Whovian (Reply #12)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 06:01 PM

21. That's right!

Why am I talking about a discount!? We just get them for free!!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:47 PM

13. On 7 November AM, I got a unicorn that farts rainbows

Plus, I have since received the prepaid VISA card, my new Obamaphone, a Volvo, and unlimited food stamps. Now I am eating steak with truffle sauce at every meal.

Victory is sweet!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:48 PM

14. Damn I'm in FL it will take weeks for me to get my free stuff

I want my free stuff!!!

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Response to kydo (Reply #14)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:54 PM

18. I hope Sam Brownback doesn't confiscate mine

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Response to BuelahWitch (Reply #18)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:07 PM

31. +1

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 05:51 PM

16. by contrast, the rich guys who bankroll the GOP expect NOTHING in return

No tax breaks, subsidies, or protection from prosecution. They just love the ideas of the Republican Party and think they are best for America.

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Response to yurbud (Reply #16)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 10:00 PM

74. Bless their hearts

Salt of the earth, those lads.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 06:06 PM

22. I GOT TRAVEL STAMPS

that are good for one world cruise for two on the QEII. Also included in my travel packet are airline vouchers for first class travel to any destination. Vouchers can be used multiple times but are only good for one year. At the end of the year I must reapply for the travel stamps and verify that I do not have a job and therefore will be available to travel. Oh the red tape in just getting my stuff!!

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Response to corneliamcgillicutty (Reply #22)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:08 PM

32. Most of them

sound like devout Calvinists.

BTW, I got my free stuff early 'cuz I voted early and the dems were concerned that I wouldn't get it after the election 'cuz I live in a reeeeeally red state.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 06:07 PM

23. What about the Obamaphones?

I can't wait to get mine!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 06:30 PM

25. I didn't get my pony yet, but I did get my other stuff. n/t

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:01 PM

27. Turning Neighbors Gay and Then Needing Abortions? Immaculate Conceptions?

Hello, Wolf? I've got a scoop for you!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:01 PM

28. To much credit given.

Republicans don't think. They believe. An important distinction.

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Response to quakerboy (Reply #28)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:09 PM

33. Indeed!

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Response to quakerboy (Reply #28)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:14 PM

58. From last weeks episode of American Horror Story: Assylum...

"Respect those who seek The Truth. Doubt those who claim to have found it."

Or something to that effect. Made me think of the difference between Nate Silver and Karl Rove.


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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:07 PM

30. Guess my free stuff was stolen by a Republican.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:13 PM

35. I got my Obama iPhone.

And a hundred pounds of caviar for my cat. A republican family was FORCED out of their ANCESTRAL home and I got to go and laff as they were tased, even the granny. Thank GOD she refused ObamaCare: More for me and any brown or dark person.

My librul buddy sprained his ankle and they sent him to the best hospital in New York City! In a stretch limo! From Florida!

He got his own plane to fly back in once his gout (from eating LOBSTER and truffles every meal; the chef they supplied him was FRENCH!

I get to ride along with gubmint re-education squads as they confiscate and burn Bibles and replace them with KORANS and melt down their guns to make statues of HITLER, STALIN and FDR dancing together.

Life is SO good these days. YAY OBAMA!

ETA:

ANd not only am I getting GAY MARRIED, everyone at the church down the street will be FORCED into it!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:14 PM

36. I'm looking forward to the E.G.M.

Enforced Gay Marriage.

I already have my eye on somebody.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:17 PM

37. But its hard to spell sitting on a T-Bagger's $10,000 Gubmint paid Hover Round.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:22 PM

38. What, no Obamaphone?!?!?

You must not rate!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:28 PM

39. Great post

But I want some of that stuff the generals are getting.........

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:29 PM

40. Don't forget that demon spawn, Saul Alinksy ...

He personally visited my house!

Wooohooo!

Edit: Correct pronoun

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:31 PM

43. I got the little house of my dreams on a quiet street,

my car paid off, and a VISA card with an unlimited credit line. Next week I'm going in for cataract surgery and dental work (all free, of course!). And you should see my new wardrobe--no more old clothes for me!

I LOVE being a Democrat!!!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:33 PM

45. All I got was a rock.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:33 PM

46. You must live in a Red State.

I also got a copy of Rules for Radicals and a Chinese Jeep.

Edited because everyone else beat me to the phone joke.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:34 PM

47. Yacht? Where's my Yacht?!?



....oh shit....wrong Party....

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:43 PM

48. I live in Northern VA

Obama promised to bring my free stuff to me personally. Not sure what it is, but he has good connections. Just hope it doesn't include a turnip from Michelle. I'll take free organic squash though. I don't like turnips, but they are both well aware of that.

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Response to Sophiegirl (Reply #48)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 10:07 PM

75. I do too and my son was told by a mom that he won't have to ask for band donations anymore

Really. He and his friends were collecting money for the band last weekend (a well-known annual collection event in our community). At one house, my son explained what they were doing. The mom said that her daughter went to well-known private school. She then went on to ask who the kids supported in the election. Keep in mind that these were 9th graders. One kid blurted out "Obama" and it was all over at that point. The mom said, "Oh, bad choice." She then went on to say that "Next time, if there *is* a next time, you won't have to ask for donations because Obama will be giving money away."

Needless to say, she didn't donate.

How rude and unbelievable is that?!

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Response to Neurotica (Reply #75)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 06:50 PM

89. What High School?

My kids went to Marshall and my son was in the band and went out at the beginning of the year for "Tag Day."

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:46 PM

49. Fort Lauderdale here. Tired and happy. Just got home from the Moochers Ball in Wilton Manors. Great

Time was had by all, but so much stuff, I had to make two trips to get it all home. Plus, not I am complaining, but I had to sign a promise to get an abortion and "go gay". Totally worth all the free shit.

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Response to amywalk (Reply #49)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 11:03 PM

79. Did anyone impregnate 50 people? We need more people asking for free stuff. And to keep getting

free stuff, we need to out vote the other side.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:50 PM

50. I got a lifesize stuffed Big Bird and a bag full of contraceptives in my 1st Free Stuff Package. nt

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Response to Honeycombe8 (Reply #50)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 11:08 PM

80. Your limitless credit card and luxury car are coming next week. Along with your Obama phone. nt

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Response to bluestate10 (Reply #80)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 07:49 PM

90. LOL. My car better be a pink Cadillac. After all, I AM a whore and a pimp! nt

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:54 PM

51. Uhh, Hellooooo -- Porn?!

I was told there would be free porn!

Specifically I'm waiting on "The Welfare Queen Does the Arty Jobless Hipster" ... *tapping toe*

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Response to Arugula Latte (Reply #51)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 06:35 PM

88. don't you mean the Welfare Drag Queen? we only get GLBT porn

to get us ready for forced gay marriage next week

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Response to rbrnmw (Reply #88)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 10:44 PM

91. That's right. Thanks for the reminder.

Are we going on the lottery system for our gay marriages? Or is there a giant computer base matching us on our interests such as "multiple piercings of unlikely body parts" and "overthrowing the bourgeoisie"?

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 07:55 PM

52. I have a question about the free pot.

I mean, I assume that I'll get free pot. My concern is that its use might be prohibited by Sharia law. Do I have to be sure to smoke it all before Inauguration Day? or is the implementation of Sharia law scheduled for later in the year?

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Response to Jim Lane (Reply #52)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 11:11 PM

81. No worry.

YOur home brewery is on the way. You can smoke pot and wash it down with beer while you lay around every day waiting for your next welfare check.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:01 PM

54. Hmmmph! All I got was an I vote sticker...

Can I at least have a raise?

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Response to MzShellG (Reply #54)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:41 PM

71. You're not high enough?

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:03 PM

55. You forgot about my Cadillac.

I'm going down to the dealer next week after the welfare line gets shorter.

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Response to JohnnyRingo (Reply #55)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:16 PM

60. Whazzamata? Didn't you get an elevator for it? nt

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Response to Sedona (Reply #60)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:02 PM

67. Nah... Wrong guy won. LOL

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:16 PM

59. I don't think this is legit. You made one logical error...

How can gay people be forced to have abortions? Answer me that!

Ha, gotcha!

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Response to dsharp88 (Reply #59)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:28 PM

65. Gurlz....

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:17 PM

61. I got a flying saucer, a harem, a year's supply of Frosted Flakes, and a hand-buzzer!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:20 PM

62. Where are my Soros checks?

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:24 PM

63. One of The Gays - a black one! - was just here!

He was driving a school bus full of young children he was indoctrinating to also be Gays. After we exchanged our secret Democratic code words ("Death to America! Down with George Washington, up with Muhammad!"), he gave me my free copy of The Communist Manifesto, stuffed full of hundred dollar bills and food stamps.

Tomorrow he's going to come back with some illegal aliens and we're gonna confiscate the neighbor's guns. If it gets too dark to confiscate -- what with our evil daylight savings conspiracy -- we'll just burn antique, thirteen-starred American flags for light and warmth. Yippee!

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 08:26 PM

64. I got a rock.




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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Tue Nov 13, 2012, 09:51 PM

72. Well i got a trip to Disney World

but it may be a trick as it was delivered in a papa johns pizza box. then i really don't know because the delivery guy was driving a Cadillac and dressed really nice. Do they take food stamps at Disney or should i just cash my big ass welfare check ?

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 12:50 AM

83. I smoked 4 onces of gay marijuana ...

... and now I'm eyeing Brad Pitt rather than Angelina Jolie.

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Response to Whovian (Original post)

Wed Nov 14, 2012, 08:39 AM

85. they just took my rich neighbor's house and divided it among me and 5 others.

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